Turmoil in the world of beauty pageants

Regular readers of this blog likely have noticed that I have not been covering beauty contests with sufficient due diligence so here are some items to make up for that deficiency.

The first is that Nina Davuluri, an Indian-American, was yesterday selected as Miss America, thus advancing the diabolical plot by people of color to take over the country and completely oppress white people. Already complaints have come in that Miss America should be an ‘American’ and asking when a white woman will win that contest. The fact that many seemed to think she was an Arab and that her selection occurred just four days after the anniversary of 9/11 seemed to cause an immense amount of angst. I mean, who can blame them? A black president AND an Indian Miss America? When will the humiliation of white America end?

Meanwhile, there has been a fuss about the Miss World contest currently being held in Indonesia. Who would have guessed that holding a beauty contest with women parading around in revealing swimsuits would arouse protests in a Muslim-dominated country that has an increasingly large hardline religious community that views even the sight of a woman’s bare shoulder as an intolerable sexual provocation that will inflame male passions? In order to placate the hardliners, the organizers have dropped the bikini portion of the contest and have been asked by the government to move the finals from the capital Djakarta to the resort island of Bali, where Hindus are the majority.

In addition, a counter beauty pageant called Muslimah World has been arranged in which the contestants “have to be pious, be a positive role model and show how you balance a life of spirituality in today’s modernized world” said the event’s founder Eka Shanti.

“We don’t just want to shout ‘no’ to Miss World,” said Shanti. “We’d rather show our children they have choices. Do you want to be like the women in Miss World? Or like those in Muslimah World?”

The event’s contestants were chosen for their religious abilities, including memorization of the Quran and also public speaking, beauty, style, and fashion modeling.

Fourteen of the 20 finalists are Indonesian, and others come from Brunei, Malaysia, Bangladesh, Iran and Nigeria.


  1. Numenaster says

    Presumably the public speaking segment will measure contestants’ ability to remain appropriately silent in public, and beauty/style/fashion modeling will be combined into a “Best Burqa” section.

  2. Chiroptera says

    Regular readers of this blog likely have noticed that I have not been covering beauty contests with sufficient due diligence….

    Wait, we still have those things?

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