Doors

Here’s an entirely hypothetical scenario.

You’re in a room with two exits, marked Door A and Door B. By each is a guardian, Guardian A and Guardian B. You need to go through one of the doors.

Door A is light and flimsy, easy to open—just turn the knob and you’re through it. Reasonably enough, before charging through, you ask Guardian A what’s on the other side.

“Joy and delight, an eternal life of perfect happiness, an end to doors and constant traveling…and all you have to do is turn that little knob, and believe.”

That sounds too good to be true, so you ask him how he knows, and whether he has been through the door.

“No, not yet, I can only go once my tour of duty here is done. But I dream of it every night, and I can also tell you that almost everyone who has come here has gone through Door A.”

You want confirmation, so you turn to Guardian B and ask if that’s true.

“Yes,” he says, “most people do go through Door A. I don’t know if it’s true about what’s on the other side, though.”

Door B is rather imposing: it’s a huge steel block, bristling with locks and complicated gadgets. It looks like it’s going to take a lot of time and cleverness and strength to get it open. It’s so intimidating, you’re not even sure that you’ll be able to figure out how to open it. You ask Guardian B if it’s as difficult as it looks.

“Oh, man, yes…it’s hard. At least it was when I was your age—now I’ve had so much practice at it that I can go through this door easily, all the time. I’m afraid I can’t just open it for you, though. I can give you suggestions and hints, but you really do have to do all the work yourself. It’s a kind of admissions test to see if you’ll be able to cope on the other side.”

This is not entirely encouraging, and you hope there’s something as good as joy and delight beyond the door, so you ask what’s over there.

“Knowledge,” says Guardian B. “Hard work. Interesting ideas. And doors—many more doors, each one harder than the next, and no end to them in sight. Clever people, all working together to open more doors. It’s a whole world, a good but complicated place.”

Guardian A screams, “HE LIES! There’s a tiger on the other side that will kill and eat you. I think it’s on fire, too. And worst of all, if you go through Door B, you’ll never get to experience the beautiful life behind Door A. Guardian B is evil, and he wants you to suffer!”

Guardian B just rolls his eyes. He’s heard this before.

“Look, kid, Guardian A means well, but he doesn’t know anything. I’ve told you the truth about what’s behind my door; maybe ol’ A is right about what’s behind his door, but all I’ve ever seen when someone opens Door A is a dark room beyond. You get to make the choice, at least so far—A and his friends want to seal off my door to ‘protect’ all the travelers who come through here.”

Your choice. What door do you go through?

Welcome to the new place!

As you’ve figured out now, I’ve joined the ranks of the many science bloggers at scienceblogs.com. The plaster’s still wet on the walls and there are a few things I still would like to see fixed up here in the new place (my rotating logos will be implemented some time—Carl Buell‘s Brontops will change now and then, pretty as it is; someday I’ll have to see what I can do to get Pirate Mode functioning here, too), but for now it’s a good clean layout and plenty of buckets to pour text into, and that’s all that really matters. Most importantly, with a team of pros managing the behind-the-scenes work and some really powerful servers to handle the pages, I’m hoping the frequent slow-downs and flailing databases of the past are now behind me. Let’s try to kick the tires and have a few hundred-thousand-visitor days to see how well it can all cope, OK?

Let me also reassure (or worry) you with one important thing: I think Seed gets it. When we were negotiating this move, one specific request was that I could be as free here to say what I want as I was on my own server, and I’m confident that that will be the case—so expect me to be as obnoxious as ever, sprinkling little bits of information on my usual abrasiveness to make it all go down smoothly. So, no changes except for the new URL, better performance, and a few quirky features that are gone but may slowly be restored…content will be the same, and there are promises of better things to come. We all win!

Of course, if there are things you really miss, or if you encounter new problems, please do let me know about them, and I’ll pass them onto the good guys who do the real work around here. I’m planning to just put my feet up and babble.