It hurts so much when friends and family post this sort of thing.
Devout Christians have found by looking through a microscope a gene in your D and A that makes you an atheist. It’s the Satan gene what do you say to that atheists Satan made you this way so god must be real
You can’t argue with that. All you can do is close the window, delete your facebook account, send a hit squad of clowns armed with pies to Zuckerberg’s house, and resign from the human race.
Whenever God opens a door, he closes a window.
Devout christians have no business looking at my D and A.
Is there a conversion/deconversion gene in one’s D and A as well? If so, did God put it there or Satan?
Thinking of it, maybe conversion and deconversion occur from epigenetics.
I never got this far. When I got the third friendship request from my friends girlfriends DOG I got the message. That place is not for me.
They… saw DNA by means of a microscope. And not a scanning tunneling electron microscope, but just a normal light microscope.
What.
What are you talking about DNA. It’s clearly D and A. Those things are clearly seen under a microscope.
Christians are too obvious.
The worse ones are so-called “liberals” who posts “Support Israel” on their FB on Oct 7, then radio silence for the rest of the war, instead, they’re whining about how AI this or Trump that.
It took me five minutes to parse this. But I still can’t quite figure out what the original poster thinks “D and A” would be. “Dick and Ass”?
D’N’A, like Toys’R’Us.
Are you sure this story wasn’t a part of the “poopology” article below? Wow…
Umm, how is this facebooks fault?
Okay, idiots say stupid things on facebook. Theyalso say stupid things on X-twiiter, on Truth social -atleats whilst that lasts, on TikTok on whatver, in bars and churche sand other places anyhow.
Fb is just one of my media where people say absurd and fallacious things. Why single it out in particular? I don’t get it.
Also, of course, you can ague with it. Arguing with it may or may not help and suit your purposes and likely wont convince the poster of that tripe – at least not immediately but still.
@ 8. voidseraph : Not sur eif serious but reckon its DNA as in deoxyribonucleic acid as we understand it (kinda ~ish) and they obvs don’t.
This looks like parody to me.
@ ^ Raging Bee : Yes it does but then it is very hard to say for sure..
Poes law sadly applies.
@Raging Bee #13 – My first thought too, but something that starts off as parody can still be taken seriously if people are willing to believe it.
D’nA to y’all
Clarifying #12 : “..as in deoxyribonucleic acid as we understand it (kinda ~ish)..” here – “we” being me in partciula and likely not necessarily others who do ndestand DNA much better than I do. Not that I’m alone but then I’m sure there are people who understand it far better than I and many others do.
FWIW. Pretty sure Satan wasn’t meant to be able to make people X, Y, Z, athiest or otherwise in the Christianist mythology albeit so many varations and splinters and differing views as typical of all large
religionsovergrown cults. .PPS. Finally sa w the final season of the (not the in anything but name – the robot dogs version*) War of the Worlds just now and, well, so many unanswered questions and “what the that still doesn’t make any sense WHY??? feelings and thoughts on it.
.*
Sigh, yes, I really should be asleep now. A-n-y-h-o-w see :
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/War_of_the_Worlds_(2019_TV_series)
As I intended to put that link there.. Hands, brain,, world, all messed up..
@16. Larry : R well, N – e how..
( ‘e’ for emissions, Peculiar emissions in stellar spectarl terms. Maybe?)
If satan is powerful enough to insert genes into our DNA, that makes it as powerful as the xian god.
And, why didn’t that all powerful god just remove the satan gene?
It’s Epicurus again.
“Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not all powerful.
Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent.
Is he both able and willing? Then why is there evil?
Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?”
It is hard to tell satan from the fundie xian god.
The fundie xian god makes satan look good.
I gave up on Facebook long ago for many reasons.
Facebook is a very predatory company.
You are their product. They vacuum up all your information and sell it.
Besides which, as a Boomer, I noticed that almost all of my contemporaries aren’t on Facebook. Nobody I know and want to talk to has a Facebook account.
and resign from the human race.
Already disqualified from the human race for shoving.
I quit Facebook when they stopped showing me my friends’ feed and instead starting showing me their maximize-engagement feed.
The characterization of the Abrahamic religions as “monotheistic” is a joke. Like most polytheistic pagan religions of the ancient world, the Old Testament is full of other people’s gods. It was assumed these other gods existed though perhaps not as powerful as THE god. So, Satan is a god, or at least a demigod, as are Bal, Beelzebub, Ashera. David (the beloved) and Solomon (wisdom) are also gods/demigods. Even Eve (who “creates” Cain and Abel) and Adam should probably fall into this category. The New Testament has a fair amount of ambiguity about “other” gods.
Which continues today.
Xians don’t even agree on how many gods there are.
Three? Four? One? Five?
The RCC would add Mary to the Trinity. Throw in satan and they are up to five.
The various xian gods all vary a lot among themselves.
Liberal SJW god.
Deistic god.
Mystic god.
Republican god.
Tea Party god.
Fundie xian god.
White nationalist god.
Neo-Nazi god.
Mormon god.
To call these gods the same stretches the point beyond breaking.
The various xian gods don’t even like each other.
Pick whichever god or gods you want. They are all equally real, after all.
Raven @25 – yes, but the bit I really don’t get, and nobody seems to ask, is “even if this God of yours exists, why do you think a. you need to worship and obey it b. why does this God demand that you do that?” I’m pretty sure none of them have even thought about it.
I’m reminded of why I left Christianity. Glad I eventually found my way to atheism. Far more love and hope than Christians offered me. Even in these dark days, they still don’t have anything to offer me on an emotional level.
As for Facebook, I’m glad I dodged that bullet long in advance: Never got into it. My dad uses it for his photo club and doesn’t engage with anyone else specifically because of the absurdity and hate outside his little circle… Now I’m feeling nostalgic for Web 1.0.
For the Satan gene, I remember some fundie claiming vaccines were filled with demon DNA that would steal your soul or something, equivalent to performing The Unforgivable Sin if you got injected. Tells you how weak their God is, if a human intervention can damn someone’s soul to eternal torment by fiddling with their meat chemicals. Of course, it is consistent with their frequent transphobia: They see the soul as subservient and inferior to the meat between one’s legs.
Whether you believe that spark of personhood is the product of emergent behavior from neurochemical reactions, some kind of ineffable aether, or whatever else civilizations have dreamed up, it still amazes me that people take such meat idolatry seriously and are willing to hurt people over it.
The fundie xian bar is a lot lower than that.
You don’t have to obey their god. You are supposed to try but there is no real penalty for failing.
To be saved, all you have to do is have faith. Faith that jesus is god.
That is all. That is it. That is all you have to do to be saved and born again.
“Once saved, always saved.”
“Xians aren’t better, just saved.”
It is all sort of trivial.
Why does jesus care if anyone believes he is real and the god of the universe anyway? It shouldn’t make any difference to him.
Do my family, friends, and pets believe I exist?
I have no idea because they never say.
If they said they didn’t believe I actually existed, I wouldn’t care. It doesn’t make any difference to me.
I would be concerned that they are having mental problems though.
It is a common delusion that your friends and family have been replaced. Replaced by exact duplicates of your friends and family.
I saw this once long ago. Fortunately, it was temporary and they managed to come out of it.
If the Xians think there is a devil gene they should fund a CRISPR-cas9 insertion of a “gene driver” that expunges it from the gene pool.
(Hey, that is a decent idea for a grift. You can have the idea for free but please tell me how many marks agree to pay you money to de-satanize the species)
“Monolatry” is a useful word.
From what we know of ancient religious practice, with city-specific patron gods and so forth, it seems likely that some form of monolatry was always closer to the norm than true polytheism anyway.
The phenomenon obviously very neatly bridges the gap between polytheism and so-called “monotheism” of the Abrahamic type, to the extent the latter truly ever exists in practice anyway. It’s curious that monolatry often seems to be elided in popular ‘history of religion’ presentations, in order to present monotheism as far more of a conceptual leap than it actually is.
I get it. We need to find Satan’s genetic lab (in a volcano, perhaps?) and destroy it.
I am willing to organise the search if you send me your credit card details.
For an additional fee, you get a jar of my BS-G (begone-satan-gene) Ivermectin, blessed by Yog-Sototh himself.
If you look at how they act and disregard what they say, fundamentalists from all of the Abrahamic organized religions are indeed monotheists.
They worship Mammon (and no other).
Perhaps not by that name, but that’s what their actions tell me… and told Richard Pryor half a century ago… https://youtu.be/PV1Kc4mo1_0?si=SDvOJrWWJALnQ8cG&t=120
You have better odds of winning Powerball three times in a row than this being a genuine posting by a “devout Christian” putting this forth as a serious argument.
The biggest tell is this: the kind of Christian who might post a message resembling this would never write “god” with a lower case “g” when they were referring to their god, even if they misspelled every other word in their post. The fact that they didn’t misspell anything but “D and A”, and that they did capitalize Satan, but not god, are also clues.
This is most likely either somebody’s idea of a joke, or just straight-up trolling.
jack lecou @ #30 — Nice polysyllable. I’ll try to remember it. I would agree it describes the Judean approach, and probably most early Christians. As I understand it there were favorites associated with a place (city, mountain) though it seems those gods were more of a patron or protector from all the other gods. In other words, they plied the local god for protection but saw other gods all around them.
Knew I had a Satan gene in my D, didn’t know there was one in my A as well. Hi there little fellow.
Checkmate. We lost. Drat.
Social media is such a wasteland of stupid. Almost all of it. I honestly don’t bother with any of it.
The biggest difference between Christians and Satanists is that it’s only the Christians who have total faith in the existence of Satan! 🤪
And all the cards will fall like dominoes. Checkmate Atheists.
I’d like to think it’s a Poe, but too many of the faithful have worked too hard to prove me wrong.
All comments (I have read) are clever and appreciated.
I especially appreciated @27 birgerjohanssen and @37 Bruce
Not leaving my own “clever” comments because it would be noise and not better than others.
This looks like the product of something someone said out loud fed into a slick speech-to-text-to-inspirational-quote generator with no proofreading.
I’ve heard worse arguments put forth in all seriousness by devout Christians. I will never underestimate the bottom of the barrel for evidential apologetics.
They’re idiots to post something like that.
I think the solution is offering to buy them a subscription for a free dictiamatery site. Then wait to see if they notice anything wrong with that statement beyond “I will not take your evil atheist Satan money!”