She’s made of iron

I played hooky this morning to escort my wife to and from the hospital, where she had a colonoscopy done. Apparently she’s perfect inside as well as outside, and got a clean bill of health. So clean that the doctor said she doesn’t have to come back for ten years.

I guess I’m as ugly on the inside as I am outside, because last time I had this done I was told I should come back every three years. Mary is going to outlast me, that’s for sure.


  1. says

    That is probably true for me and my husband (I will go years before him). Funny enough I would rather it be that way, I definitely want to be selfish and go first. Will suck for him, but then he could trade up for a younger female :)

  2. says

    There’s gonna be fortune, lamborghinis, and blow for the broker who arranges to sell NFTs of the colonoscopies of the rich and famous. The great part is nobody’ll really be able to tell yours from Kim Kardashian’s so all you need is a friendly endoscopist and a USB stick!

  3. DonDueed says

    My first one, I got clearance for ten years. My second, I had a polyp and had to come back after five.
    My third one is next month.

  4. says

    So very happy to hear that about your wife. And, I know that many others share my sentiment that I hope you are here for a very long time. (That may be both a blessing and a curse, given the state of the world in which we live)

  5. davidc1 says

    It has been three years since my last one,so I am overdue.But because of the pandemic and that twat faced twat johnsons handling of it,the NHS has a waiting list of ten million for more important things like cancer treatment,so I won’t bother them.

  6. nomdeplume says

    Two kinds of people in this world, those who have to have colonoscopies every 3 years and those who have them every 10.

  7. birgerjohansson says

    Your wife is clearly part rockfish – they don’t decline with age (Science, november 11th).

  8. simonhadley says

    My one and only colonoscopy was around ten years ago and I spent the next week in total agony. It was so bad they put me on a fluoroscope to check for perforations, which there were none. I’m due again but the thought of going through that kind of pain again terrifies me. I’d like to know if anyone else has experienced this because it doesn’t seem normal.

  9. StevoR says

    @ simonhadley : I don’t think so, no, but I also think we’re the wrong people to be asking and you should ask your doctor – and maybe get a second opinion.I’m surprised you didn’t ask at the time..

    @ davidc1 : What? During or after you’re colonoscopy?! Wrong order I’d say!

    @ shermanj : Seconded by me.