I tried. I put the young male spiders with the young female spiders, and the females cringed and refused to move while the males wandered around pretending to be busy. You don’t even have to watch the movie, the full story is in the title.
I’ll plump them up and try again in a few weeks.
Perhaps you should start with foot rubs and see what develops from there.
Cue that well-known Australian expression: “I’m not here to fuck spiders!”
Apparently, neither are the spiders.
‘Plump them up’? Perhaps you need a fluffer.
Hey, spiders, it’s a junior high dance this Friday!
My own sex life has been much the same, sadly. Well, apart from being shunted in the direction of potential mates with a paintbrush. That doesn’t happen to me very often. Maybe I should be thankful that nobody has tried to eat me either.
Well, did you institute a proper sex-education programme for them in advance? If not, you’ve only yourself to blame!
Maybe they’ve given up sex and cannibalism for Lent.
The thumbnail image is a disturbingly accurate description of my dating life.
throwaway, butcher of tongues, mauler of metaphor says
What does food availability have to do with receptivity to mating for either the male or female? Would a starved male and female pair be more or less willing to mate? What about the inverse situations?