Octopuses do not have magic powers

That German octopus has much to answer for…or rather, the aquarium that got lots of free advertising by promoting it as a soccer game predictor does. Now an Arizona aquarium has an octopus that ‘predicts’ the outcome of the Superbowl, and it’s getting annoying. I have a quarter in my pocket that predicts the outcome, too — heads, Seahawks; tails, Patriots.

Besides, octopus-picking and coin-flipping are irrelevant. Seahawks are going to win.


  1. Menyambal says

    I dunno about them not having magical powers. I heard there was a professor up in Minnesota, they completely took over his brain.

    (Hey, thanks. I just learned who is gonna be in the Super Bowl. I really had not known.)

  2. twas brillig (stevem) says

    But how could the Patriots possibly lose? Inconceivable!! Belacheck (sp?) won’t ever let it happen: tween eavesdropping on the enemies radio signals (twixt coach and Qback), to under-inflating Brady’s “special” set of balls for the game, to whatnot. The Pats can’t lose. Ever. (‘cept when they do lose, however…).
    But if the Magic Octo says so, gotta happen. Magic, donchano. But, but but, NOT MAGIC, just those special eyes octos have; infused with thiotimeoline, gives them the ability to watch events of the future. We can only see the present, see we mustn’t rule what what is possible to the octo eyes.

  3. twas brillig (stevem) says

    edit @3:
    see we mustn’t rule out what what is possible to the octo eyes.

  4. says

    You are aware that the Giant Pacific Octopus is found in Puget Sound? Inside info. Not magic.

    Also, if the Patriots should win, there will be a great rising, and an end of humanity’s time. And Seattle shall be eaten first.

  5. says

    What is this “superb owl” you speak of? A subspecies of the great horned owl? It must be if you’re talking about Seattle, since that owl is found in that state.

  6. samgardner says

    Oh, come on, everyone knows god is just going to swoop down and make a team win at the last moment (you know — about halfway through the second quarter).

  7. Alverant says

    Nah it’s Teddy Bear the porcupine who knows who will win. And he’s cuter than some silly cephalopod.

  8. Matrim says

    Octopodes do not have precognition…however they are able to phase through solid matter like Shadowcat, and at least a few of them can shoot laser beams out of their eyes.

    @10, Eamon Knight

    But did you learn anything else?

  9. skybluskyblue says

  10. Ichthyic says

    under-inflating Brady’s “special” set of balls

    out of context, that is a rather strange turn of phrase.

  11. souhjiro says

    But…but octopi are experts on soccer, for them to predict football outcomes is a bad idea

  12. ravenred says

    You have a MAGIC, FUTURE-PREDICTING quarter?

    Truly, a great prophet art thou, Myers….

  13. twas brillig (stevem) says

    re 24:
    Of course, EVERY coin knows the future accurately. One side is TRUE, always. So it is always correct. Flipping it is simply superfluous. One side is always right (it’s our fault if we can’t figger out which side is correct ;-( ).

  14. gerryl says

    Oregon Zoo has an aged orangutan who used to be presented with jerseys from each super bowl team. She actually had a pretty good record for selecting the winner. The media would be invited to watch the selection and it would end up on the evening news. It was weird how seriously the reporters took the event. The rule was that she had to put the jersey all the way on for her selection to count.

    They don’t appear to be doing this anymore, but i’m pretty sure she would have to go with the home team.