Phillip Garrido was a man of God with a joyful story to tell.

“If you take this a step at a time, you’re going to fall over backward and in the end you’re going to find the most powerful, heart-warming story,” he said.

“I tell you here’s the story of what took place at this house and you’re going to be absolutely impressed.

Oh, right. Here’s his heart-warming story: in 1991 he and his wife kidnapped an 11 year old girl; they imprisoned her in their backyard; he raped her repeatedly; and she eventually gave birth to two children, who are now 11 and 15, and who were also confined to that small yard for their entire lives.

I am not impressed. I presume that what he thinks makes this a happy tale is that he was an enthusiastic god-walloper who was caught while handing out religious tracts, but you can read his blog and see that he was just nuts.