I get email

The other day, I pointed out that tasteless web design is a hallmark of crazy web sites, and used this Overcompensating comic to illustrate it…and you all scurried over to Timecube to see one of the best examples on the web.

I got this email today.

Dear Mr. Meyers,

Putting aside any offensive criticism of our website on your web page at http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/contact.php, we found many of the comments extremely humorous, even though at our expense.

We comment on your page at http://lfnexus.com/scumbagwebsites.htm.

Thank you for the good laugh!

Oh, yes, you can share this email with anyone you wish!

PS: There is method in our madness.


Dr. Michael Bisconti
The L. F. Nexus

They got the url of my “offensive criticism” wrong: it’s at an article called “How can you tell when you’re a kook?” I think he shows all the signs.

Here’s what’s really funny. I originally laughed at a whole series of insane arguments he made against evolution, homosexuality, and women, and look at what he considers the most offensive thing I said, that warrants rating me as a “medium scumbag”:

This website incorrectly reported that we believe that Gay “activity” can be sinless. However, this was due to an editorial problem on one of our web pages, which has since been corrected.

I guess my sin was that I accurately reported on a comment that was less than damning of homosexuality.

But now, you must see this: their updated website. Behold, and tremble in fear. This is getting up there pretty darned near Time Cube territory. It may get even better, since up near the top they prominently mention that they have a new site under construction by WebPsyops, Inc.. Yeah, that’s who we all ought to turn to for our professional web design.


  1. Emmet Caulfield, OM says

    This is getting up there pretty darned near Time Cube territory.

    Still in the ha’penny place compared to Gene Ray — at most 0.5 Tc — so lame, they can’t even do “stark raving bonkers” right.

  2. clinteas says


    Powered by the Nexus Empire?

    What the hell is this lunacy??
    The page layout makes one dizzy….

    Who’s this Mr Meyers anyway??

  3. Weaves says

    That site hurts my eyes. I have no idea what they’re trying to get across or want me to click. It’s a bunch of randomly placed, badly spelt tripe.

  4. NewEnglandBob says

    Dr. Michael Bisconti knows a lott about scumbags because he is one.

    I bet he is a voodoo doctor!

  5. AnthonyK says

    Must…deny…evolution…one million pages…not wrong…headaches….nexus…ultimate truth…PZ Myers…only man with beard…embryos..evil..must be destroyed…

  6. says

    “because sometimes a person writes things in a temporarily impaired mental or emotional state that they later regret and recant.”

    Well, there’s hope for them, I suppose.

    It’s not like getting banned in Turkey, though.

  7. dead yeti says

    #3 – Mr Meyers would be me, strangely almost everyone who writes to me spells it Myers, PZ i want my surname back.

  8. ennui says

    eXolution FTW!

    Maybe PZ just should have jabbed a fork in our eyes, to save time and everything. That web design stinks worse than rotting olive loaf on a sumo wrestler’s taint.

    That is all.

  9. Laurel says

    Before the internet, the only way to expose yourself to this level of crazy was to work at Kinko’s.

  10. says

    Thank you for reminding me of the nauseating horror that is TimeCube. With that in mind, I clicked and trembled in fear at the Nexus site. It does make me wonder if they tried to implant any subliminal messages in there.

  11. Arnold Facepalmer says

    Try harder next time PZ, you only rated “medium scumbag” on his rating system, not the highly rated “monster scumbag” category.

  12. Muzz says

    Surely anything called a Medium Scumbag list has to include John Edward et al

    I’ll get me coat.

  13. Nerd of Redhead says

    Why does the name of that web company make me think of some of the baddies on B5? Did they intend that connection?

  14. mayhempix says

    That has to be the ugliest website… hard to look at. But at least it does match the “content”.

    My favorite heading was:

    (Now in Alphabetical Order)”

    I’m so impressed they finally learned how to list alphabetically.
    Even idiots can learn new tricks.

  15. Cappy says

    Now THAT is some crazy stuff! I went to the page on eXolution and when I clicked on any of the links explaining it or how evolution was in error all I got was”URL not found”.

  16. WRMartin says

    What is there fixation with The Rambo Hunters? Isn’t that a gay dance troupe?
    Hmm, on further reflection The Rambo Hunters appear to be on the side of teaching evolution:

    We are now in the process, working with the L. F. Nexus at http://lfnexus.com, of training 10,000 bounty hunters to enforce the upcoming “Lockdown Law,” which prevents the teaching of the scientific uncertainty of evolution in science classrooms.

    Emphasis: mine. From: http://rambohunters.com/
    If there actually was a law called the “Lockdown Law”, that is. And if it actually applied to the illegality of teaching the uncertainty of evolution.
    Or would that be yet another ‘editorial problem’? Methinks the entire ‘organization’ might be an editorial problem. Or quite possibly they are incorporated as a disorganization. An LLD (Limited Liability Disorganization) if you will.
    But that’s just a guess. I certainly don’t need 1,000 oily Bear-y Bounty Hunters with lube knocking on my door to make sure I’m doing the sodomy thing correctly.
    Most of their pages appear to be some sort of test page for detecting insanity but they read the paper incorrectly and got the captions mistaken then went ahead with Insanity Template Version 2.9.123421349834965874698769844365.b

  17. Sastra says

    Who are these people? Well, I looked, and found this on their site:

    Our website is a joint venture of the Chicago Christian University, the National Psychiatric Association, the Pneumiatry Institute, the Chicago Theoretical Physics Institute, the Chicago Linguistics Institute, the American Institute for Men, our other partners, and the Chicago Collegiate Church. Our purpose is to establish and demonstrate the foundations of knowledge and belief.

    “National Psychiatric Association?” Isn’t that a large, legitimate organization?

    No, you’re thinking of the American Psychiatric Association. According to their webpage, the National Psychiatric Association was founded when the APA “rejected the scientific method in the classification of mental illness” when they no longer considered homosexuality an illness. It appears to be the same folks as in the other site. I’m going to guess that all these organizations consist of the very same people. Or, perhaps, person.


  18. ctygesen says

    I’m reaching for some kind of comparison, but I’ve started to realize that ‘batshit crazy’ is entirely unfair to batshit.

    Is anyone else preparing to fight the 10,000 bounty hunters that will enforce the Anti-Evolution law? Finally a use for my Zombie Survival Guide.

  19. mayhempix says

    I was so impressed to see that WebPsyops is building a “Time Machine”.

    There’s a reason they boast about artificial intelligence.
    Their web page is so advanced it doesn’t do anything.

  20. Alien says

    Thank you, PZ, for the link to LFNexus. As I read the website, I could tell that I wasn’t as smart as I once was. Fortunately, the website itself explained part of my problem. It is “Fornication-Induced Brain Injury” (http://lfnexus.com/braininjuringsin.htm). Also fortunately, the website taught me how to defend myself…. with Sexual Karate! (http://lfnexus.com/sexualkarate.htm). Thank you PZ, and thank you Scienceblogs! You saved my brain with your timely steering towards this valuable knowledge!

  21. KnockGoats says

    I managed to look at that website’s front page for nearly 2 seconds. Anyone beat that?

  22. Breakfast says

    With some of these sites…my shocked amusement wanes in proportion to my growing suspicion that the author is actually an untreated case of schizophrenia (TimeCube in particular).

  23. Nerd of Redhead says

    Is anyone else preparing to fight the 10,000 bounty hunters that will enforce the Anti-Evolution law?

    With this group, they will be so inept they will make Janet Evanovich’s Stephanie Plum look like a kick-ass professional bounty hunter.

  24. Epinephrine says

    Wow, that’s a wacky little site. I love the section on “Sexual Karate”. Great advice. If only all religious nuts would avoid sexuality.


    The most basic principles for fighting sexual temptation and the most important principles for fighting sexual temptation are:


    Don’t stick your hand in the fire and you won’t get burnt.

    This means avoid temptation. For example, avoid television programs and movies that contain sexual images.


    If you get pushed into the fire, run, run, run!!!

    This means, if you accidentally run across sexual images, flee (run away as if your house was on fire).

  25. says

    My favourite part…

    Try our new high-powered search engine.
    Our search engine currently accesses only a part of our website.

    Apparently they have 14 million subscribers too.

  26. DuckPhup says

    This guy takes nutbaggery to the level of high-art. Regarding his degrees… his modus operandi appears to be setting up a phony accreditation agency… then setting up a phony institute of ‘higher learning’, which, is then accredited by the phony accreditation agency… then he grants himself a phony advanced degree from the phony institute of ‘higher learning’.


  27. Christophe Thill says

    Well, at least there’s one good thing to be said about this LF Nexus website. The design is perfectly adapted to the content.

    Ahhh… I can’t resist quoting their stuff…

    – They have a page called “Stupid hotel employees”.
    – They oppose evolution to “exolution” (which is “its contrary”). There’s even a link to a page defining exolution. But don’t click on it or you’ll get a 404.
    – The home page is full of missing pictures. Including, apparently, a portrait of Albert Einstein.
    – In 2009 they’ll open “scrubbed movie theatres” in something like 50 US cities. They are places where you can see expurgated movies (but only “gratuitous violence” is deleted: “healthy violence” is allowed to stay).
    – They mock “Muslim ignorance and superstition”. Straw vs. beam, pot vs. kettle, etc.
    – They have a “ATM system” to rate TV commercials. M stands for “maddening”. It means there are “people NOT in street clothing”.
    – “Futurists see Androids, Dimethrodons, and Android Men.”

    OK… got to stop now…

  28. strangest brew says


    The L. F. Nexus is working with Rambo Hunters, Inc. to train 10,000 bounty hunters to help enforce the upcoming “Lockdown Law.” The Lockdown Law states:

    ‘Evolution may not be taught in science classrooms.’

    Does it indeed?

    Anyone aware of this supposed fact?

    De Dude is well gaga methinks!

  29. says

    I liked their big plans for “Scrubbed Movie” theaters, where they will edit out all the parts of movies they find offensive.

    They plan to open about 50 theaters all over the country this year, where they will get the money for this I can’t imagine. Still, it will be sad when they get sued for copyright violation, like the Mormons did when they opened their “Clean Flix” movie rental stores. It’s weird how so many people really don’t understand why it’s wrong to take someone’s work, change it without permission, and then sell it.

  30. mayhempix says

    It was my first visit to Timecube.

    Too absurd for words. I scrolled down the page for what seemed like an eternity. About half way down there was a picture of the good doctor aka The Wisest Man. When I finally reached the bottom it actually said “NEXT PAGE”. I mean, come on…. next page??? After that already interminable one?

    At least he doesn’t seem like he could be dangerous to others.

  31. McNam says


    They sure do, but i like how they have to write it 14,000,000 (14 million). Just in case you weren’t sure what all those zeros mean.

  32. hinschelwood says

    I notice that Gene Ray is asking for financial support for his site. I don’t know how long that message has been there – I haven’t looked at Time Cube for years now and his posting habits are strange, to say the least.

    What does he do that requires financial support? The hosting costs must be very low, even with the traffic that a classic site that Time Cube must generate. Is it to fund his research into Cubism?

    If I find a coin with four sides, I’ll send it to him.

  33. bud says

    Ha ha ha!!

    Up at the top right it says, “Our new website (see Einstein graphic below) is being built by WebPsyops, Inc., the inventor of web-based artificial intelligence”

    Go check out WebPsyops: http://webpsyops.com/

    Ha ha ha !!

  34. Feynmaniac says

    Oooh, so this is the internet equivalent of a crazy homeless man yelling on the street.

    Here’s a sample:


    This means, if you accidentally run across sexual images, flee (run away as if your house was on fire).


    #2 You are a moronic woman if you “wear the pants in your family.”



    Note that, for similar reasons, we DO NOT advocate the interracial marriage of ANY two races but note that we DO NOT oppose existing two-race marriages in which children are involved.


    The King James Bible is the Word of God.

  35. strangest brew says


    ‘At least he doesn’t seem like he could be dangerous to others.’

    What about the inevitability that mentally challenged bunnies that find this site and think they reached Nirvana…sorry Heaven…

    Mind you if anyone finds this site in any way a vindication of their attitude then we is all in grief methinks!

    Seems it is a project solely maintained by a bunch of wannabees all accredited by the good Doc’s degree scams!
    Plus a few erstwhile army buddies and one token female…

    Dr Dino would be jealous!

  36. julie says

    Thank goodness I had the Nexus to tell me how to be a good wife (which really seems to consist of saying “yes, dear, you’re right” in every situation). Otherwise I might have considered living my life as, you know, something other than a doormat.

    And I would pay good money to see the “scrubbed” version of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. (Yes, it’s actually on the list.) That would be, what, three minutes long?

  37. Tulse says

    Sastra, it looks like most, if not all, of those “partner” organizations you listed are simply other Dr. Michael Bisconti endeavours, and appear to be nothing more than single web pages hosted by his own hosting company, Solutions, OCC. For example, here is an exemplary passage from the website of The Pneumiatry Institute:

    The terms “Pneumiology,” “Pastoral Anthropology,” “Pneumiatry,” “Pastoral Anthropiatry,” “Anthropiatry,” “Psychiatric Pneumiatry,” and “Pneumiatric Psychiatry” were coined by Dr. Michael J. Bisconti on January 1, 1959. Pneumiology is the science of Pastoral Anthropology. Pastoral Anthropology is scripturally ethical Anthropology. Dr. Bisconti is the founder of the science of Pastoral Anthropology (Pneumiology). Anthropology is the science of human beings. Pneumiatry is the science of Pastoral Anthropiatry. Pastoral Anthropiatry is scripturally ethical Anthropiatry. Dr. Bisconti is the founder of the science of Pastoral Anthropiatry (Pneumiatry). Anthropiatry is the science of the healing of human beings from the scientific and fideistic perspectives. Dr. Bisconti is the founder of the science of Anthropiatry. Medicine is the science of the healing of human beings from the scientific perspective. Medicine is a part of the field of Anthropiatry (e.g., see Abortion). Psychiatric Pneumiatry is scripturally ethical, advanced Pastoral Psychiatry. Psychiatric Pneumiatry is not a medical discipline though it requires a degree of medical knowledge. Dr. Bisconti is the founder of the science of Psychiatric Pneumiatry. Pastoral Psychiatry is not a medical discipline (see Dr. John Bonnell). Pneumiatric Psychiatry is a specialized type of Psychiatry. Pneumiatric Psychiatrists are licensed Psychiatrists who have received additional, advanced training in Pneumiatry, including Psychiatric Pneumiatry, at the Pneumiatry Institute. Dr. Bisconti is the founder of the science of Pneumiatric Psychiatry.

    I have to admit, though, that I’m a bit confused as to who founded all these disciplines…

    (It is interesting to note that none of the navigation links on that page seem to work.)

    And of the other organizations listed on the Solutions, OCC page, my favourite is noted as:

    CSRI White Papers
    Formerly “Gays Are Perverts Dot Com”

  38. KnockGoats says

    This means, if you accidentally run across sexual images, flee (run away as if your house was on fire).

    Now that’s useful information. Just keep a porn mag (or even an underwear catalogue) in your pocket, and if you’re approached by “Dr.” Bisconti, wave it at him (I mean the mag/catalogue), and he’ll instantly flee!

  39. Feynmaniac says

    LOL! Their Media Page features Dr. Phil, Lou Dobbs, Bill O’Reilly AND Glenn Beck.

    we do believe that they are some of the better advisors, reporters, and commentators currently on television

    That explains a lot.

  40. says

    The ACLU does not know the history of the First Amendment, or the entire Constitution for that matter. When the founding fathers wrote this amendment, they were using the word “religion” in the way it was used in their time. Religion was not:

    The worship of God.

    Religion was:

    The worship of God according to some set of rules and regulations.

    In other words, the First Amendment:

    Does NOT prohibit the worship of God in the government arena.

    Rather, it prohibits:

    FORCING anyone to adopt a SPECIFIC STYLE AND MANNER of worshipping God in the government arena.

    (Do not give up your rights! Read the section below titled “Specific STYLE AND MANNER in Government Meetings and in Schools.”)


  41. Curt Cameron says

    At the bottom of his page titled “The Ten-Step Proof of the Insanity of Atheists,” it says “See Dr. Michael J. Bisconti’s 100-volume, 1000-page-per-volume Encyclopedic Apologetic for Scientific Theism (link not active yet).”

    100 volumes ?!? And 1000 pages each ?!?

  42. Janine, Bitter Friend says

    For some reason, this reminded me of Gregory Simmons second debate with PZ.

    Every now and then, another eccentric evolutionist will come out and say that they have discovered another transitional form. Basically, you can think of a transitional form as a creature that is half one creature and half another creature. It would be something like a creature that was half dog and half cat or half buffalo and half deer.

    Now, sometimes the transitional form is supposed to be something like half man and half ape. Now, when we ask the evolutionist how they know the creature is half man and half ape, here is their answer:

    Because we said so.

    When we ask why we should simply take their word for it, they answer:

    Because we are smarter than you.

    When we ask how they know they are smarter than us, they answer:

    Because we know more than you.

    When we ask how they know they know more than us, they:

    Run away!

  43. Steve_C says

    Nope Dan. It’s the real deal.

    I mean look at Icke’s site… he’s fucking insane and his site isn’t an eyesore, but I think that’s an outlier. Kooks make sites that are eyesores.

  44. Falyne says

    Hahahaha, this dude!

    Yes, every credential you see on that LF Nexus website is produced by Michael J. Bisconti himself. It’s great. Pure comedy gold.

  45. Bill says

    There are a few laughs on his “Virtual Deism” page.

    The idea is that God acts as if he’s not personally involved in the universe. Confirmation is from personal experience: “On one occasion, God confirms in our minds and hearts that he will provide a given blessing. On another occasion, he does not.”


  46. Falyne says

    My all-time personal favorite internet kook is this guy:


    Although sadly he moved all his quote banners behind a link. Used to be, all the graphics in the “quote banner” link? They were on his front page.

    His main shtick is “the evil allopathic medical conspiracy is going to kill us all”, but it also veers off into “illuminati MKULTRA demonically-mind-controlled sex slave” and “fight the government’s poisoning us with chem trails by building orgone generators to boost up the good cloud beings” territory.

  47. says

    This TimeCube thing – it is a joke, right? Right?! I mean, it has to be.. it just has to..

    Nope. It’s a man with mental health problems and an internet connection.

  48. Nangleator says

    My favorite bit:

    “There is much we can say here but suffice it to say that there are over a thousand studies (we will be publishing a few) that reveal the following simple economic fact: Men who view pornography make 45% less money in their lifetimes than men who do not view pornography.”

  49. kingjoebob says

    If only this site existed when I was in High School… The pure hell I could put my geometry teacher thru with that farked up graph paper.


    On a side note I can never unread that tripe. Web pages like that should come with warnings.

  50. says

    As the owner of the only other scumbag website to make “Dr.” Almond Biscotti’s list, can I say how honored I am to share the table with you? I’m not actually sure what I did to get listed, but it was definitely worth it, and I’ll do it again.

  51. Badger3k says

    Personally, I think “the American Institute for Men, our other partners…” is a Freudian slip. Just sayin…

    Is this where Ted Haggard will be working soon?

  52. John Phillips, FCD says

    I think even looking at that site for a few seconds damaged my brain. For since I returned here and started reading everyones posts I haven’t been able to stop laughing. I also like that WebPsyops are going to build H G Wells’ time machine all over again.

    20 years ago, crazies like this would have had to be happy writing the odd letter to their local paper and/or screaming on a soap box in their equivalent of London’s Hyde Park Corner. But oh no, thanks to the Internet, now they can inflict this on all of us as well as broadcasting it to a million web sites.

    Sorry I am rambling, well more than usual. See, I told you that a few seconds at his site damaged my brain.

  53. Christophe Thill says

    I also love how, after PZ, number 2 “scumbag” is a guy who “doesn’t understand the system of university accreditation”. Provided he really doesn’t (I haven’t checked), the guy could be stupid, perhaps. But a scumbag? Doesn’t the word suppose bad, nasty acts toward other people?
    And who is #3, will you ask? Well, there’s none. they only found 2 scumbags on the whole Web.

  54. LadyH says

    I didn’t get any farther than this before I got sick. Other than the fact that equal respect != equality, I was especially horrified by #4. It’s the assholes who aren’t “holotristically righteous” (whatever that is) who absolutely expect you to do whatever they say. Good men don’t. I like good men.

    “Here are our official positions on men and women and their differences and likenesses:

    #1. Men and women are to be afforded EQUAL respect.

    #2. Men are better suited for some of life’s callings than women.

    #3. Women are better suited for some of life’s callings than men.

    #4. Married women are to follow the leadership of their husbands in all things unless the husbands fail to pursue a holotristically righteous lifestyle.”

  55. Kevin says

    Yeah, what everyone else said!

    I think my favourite part is the passive aggressive plea for money (“Keep Your Money” at http://lfnexus.com/keepyourmoney.htm ). Don’t send us donations. We don’t want them. But if you did compensate us for the good works we do, well, that’s different: we could do miracles – like stopping evolution from being taught!


  56. noncarborundum says

    There’s even a link to a page defining exolution. But don’t click on it or you’ll get a 404.

    I did find this, but I’m afraid it won’t enhance your understanding of eXolution (or anything else) one little bit.

  57. bsk says

    “Dr. Michael J. Bisconti, B.E., M.B.A., D.B.A., M.A., Ph.D., M.S., Ph.D., M.A., Litt.D., M.S., D.Sc., Ph.M.D., S.J.D., Et Al”

    Damn, this slick dawg has two MAs, two PhDs and even a Ph.M.motherfuckin’D!

  58. Nerd of Redhead says

    Dang BSK, there went the fuse in my BS meter again. That many degrees means probably most of them were bought over the web, or just invented. Otherwise, he would be 150 years old.

  59. Falyne says

    Y’know, on the one hand, it’s probably good his claims of authority are THAT absolutely mind-bogglingly overdone. Otherwise, some moron might actually *believe* him.

    …and, yeah, I’m kinda overestimating humanity when I assume no one will find “Dr. Michael J. Bisconti, B.E., M.B.A., D.B.A., M.A., Ph.D., M.S., Ph.D., M.A., Litt.D., M.S., D.Sc., Ph.M.D., S.J.D., Et Al” believable…

  60. David Marjanović, OM says

    Sounds like I’ll have to visit that site, whale.to, and timecube.com (again) to put the Tc scale on a firm quantitative footing. I don’t have time, alas.

    But I did look at the home- and only page of WebPsyops. ROTFLMAO! I wouldn’t have thought it could be possible to diagnose someone as 0.8 Tc based on that little material!

  61. jj says

    That time timecube site is amazing. I can’t even grasp how someone could spew that much fecal matter at once. I keep trying to figure out what the hell this 4 corner cubic day is all about. It sounds sweet, and I like to believe in crazy shit, but it just keeps going into one-god-equals-queer-god-blacks-are-going-to-kill-whites-queer-queer-god-mom-dad-Queers-kill-my-lil-brother-HIV-god. Sometimes I wonder what it’s like to be that insane.

    or the Half of Earth seen from Space cannot exist without the Opposite Half NOT SEEN – existing only as opposites with a plus & minus zero existence. As an Entity, the Opposites will cancel each other out to nothing

    Now if that isn’t the most logical argument I’ve ever heard.

  62. bsk says

    SteveM, Nerd:

    My guess is he read a footnote somewhere and mistook the “et al” for a qualification after the author’s name.

  63. Parker says

    “10,000 Bounty HUnters will Enforce Evolutionary Law”.
    What, by gunning down the weak, sick and deformed? Are they going to let loose tigers in strip malls?

  64. les says

    They need to get to work; when you have 3 times as many categories of scumbags as you have identified scumbags, you’re just slackin’.

  65. says

    I can believe it…!!!!

    They claim to edit movies like: “bambi”, “Fantasia”, “Finding Nemo”, “A Space Odyssey”, “Around the World in 80 Days” to remove:

    Profanity, Verbal Obscenity, Visual Obscenity (any degree of nudity, Gay Content, Gratuitous Violence (violence that serves no purpose but to excite the viewer),Gore (extreme damaging of body parts and bodies)…

    maybe we are doing them a favor commenting about their site…

    Acording alexa:

    “pharyngula” receives about 0.0099715% of the world internet trafic, while this site receives: 0.00002%

    We are making this site more visible…

  66. ThinkingApe says

    Oh no. According to the interracial marriage link, my daughter is going to get picked on and beaten up 1000 times more than her fellow classmates when she goes to school.

  67. Janine, Bitter Friend says

    For shits and giggles, I went to the Rambo Hunters site. This is everything.


    Real American Bounty Hunters


    We are now in the process, working with the L. F. Nexus at http://lfnexus.com, of training 10,000 bounty hunters to enforce the upcoming “Lockdown Law,” which prevents the teaching of the scientific uncertainty of evolution in science classrooms.

    Anti Gang Division
    More than 50,000 bounty hunters active.

    Anti Illegal Alien Division
    More than 20,000 bounty hunters active.

    Anti Sodomite Division
    A sodomite is a person who practices homosexuality and/or bestiality.
    More than 1,000 bounty hunters active.

    Drug War Division
    More than 100,000 bounty hunters active.

    In the upper right hand corner there are links to the United States Army, United States Air Force, United States Navy and United States Marine Corps.

    For some reason, I was really hoping that their mission was to bring Sylvester Stallone down.

  68. DominEditrix says

    Hey! Don’t be so down on the LF folks! They have a Unicycle Library! Just that one wheel, going ’round and ’round and ’round…

    I’m going to go and wash my mind out now.

  69. says

    I think the Timecube is a likely example of though-disordered writing. The author appears to be a florid schizophrenic.

    The L F Nexus by “Dr.” Bisconti seems qualitatively different to me. The form of his writing is not as disordered. It could be the result of delusion and/or narcissism. It could also be an uneducated person making things up, all the while proclaiming his ideas to be profound. Kook, however is not is the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of the American Psychiatric Association. I, for one, would welcome it as a useful category.

    The URL for the “company”, WebPsyops, Inc. that is “designing” Dr. Bisconti’s “website” (all 1,000,000 pages of it) is webpsyops.com, which is owned by…drumroll…one Micheal Bisconti.


  70. karen marie says

    sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don’t.

    except in the case of dr. bisconti.

  71. Psychodigger says

    But, but, but, these people are insane! Have you read the bit where they ´prove´ that the theory of evoluthion os only a ´hypothesis´? Absolutely howling mad!

    It hurts.

  72. Aquaria says

    Before the internet, the only way to expose yourself to this level of crazy was to work at Kinko’s.

    Oh, I don’t know about that. Guess where they go to right after they leave Kinko’s?

    Yep, straight to the USPS to send it off. And we don’t get just the Kinko’s nuts. You want some real crazy, get the guys who mail their handwritten diatribes. On notebook paper. In pencil.

    We can always spot one of these missives:

    1) It never has a return address (someone other than the recipient might know the sender has the ultimate dangerous knowledge t and OH NOES!!!111!!!! The black choppers are kumin!!!!!).

    2) The sender has used 22 yards of packing tape to wrap around the entire envelope. And then the address label gets slathered onto the first few layers of tape and wrapped about 50 times with Scotch tape. And then they add the stamps layer and tape over that, a really stupid thing to do, because that invalidates the postage, which means, yep, we postal workers get to open it in the admittedly futile hope of finding contact info inside, read it to ourselves–then to our co-workers, copy it and send it around to all our friends.

    Anyone wanting to know how much crazy, stupid and just plain mean there is in America, ask a postal worker. We’re not like Best Buy or Target, serving a niche of our fellow citizens. We serve all of them. However crazy and dumb and horrible y’all think Americans can be… Well, it’s worse than that.

  73. Leon says

    Wow…that’s some busy Web site. I have to say I was struck by one of their links:

    Human Sexuality: The “Homo-Hetero” Position

    The first thing that came to mind is that however you cut it, one of the two in that position is guaranteed to be unhappy about it! Maybe Dr. Bisconti could be the “Hetero” in the position, while the rest of us watch…

  74. Qwerty says

    PZ, you have some work to do as you are only listed as a Medium Scumbag on Nexus’s website. There is room for improvement.

  75. mayhempix says

    “The URL for the “company”, WebPsyops, Inc. that is “designing” Dr. Bisconti’s “website” (all 1,000,000 pages of it) is webpsyops.com, which is owned by…drumroll…one Micheal Bisconti.”

    I knew that was coming. Nuts like Bisconti love to pretend they are a tree of nuts.

  76. Muffin says

    Hah.. the fake counter on that site made me laugh. At least if they try to present themselves as being more successful than they are, they should try to keep it realistic.

  77. dave says

    Timecube closely approaches a theoretic limit that defines just how monster raving loony you can get without actually burning a hole in the universe or something. It will be around for years for people to marvel at.

  78. Wowbagger says

    Before the internet, the only way to expose yourself to this level of crazy was to work at Kinko’s.

    Forgive my (Australian) ignorance, but why would someone at Kinko’s (a photocopying/binding place, yes?) be exposed to ‘this level of crazy’? Did something significant happen at one?

  79. ice9 says

    “The answer, primarily, is that, today, there are millions of people, especially, young people, who are ruining their lives with information, comments, and pictures they are posting on the Internet.”

    He got his degrees by out-commaing the rest of the students.

    It would be great fun to meet this man face-to-face.


  80. Steve_C says

    One of my favorite nutters is Alex Jones…

    Sounds like Limbaugh is as looney as Icke.

    His Illuminati/NWO paranoia is priceless.

  81. Paul says


    I’d assume they get a decent volume of crazed nutters self-publishing their paranoid and/or delusional pamphlets.

    Of course, having dated an Architecture major in college, most of my experiences with Kinko’s involved hysterical students running on nowhere near enough sleep trying to get something printed and getting worked up when “the guy that does the oversized printing” isn’t in today. It can be difficult to mediate in these situations.

  82. Wowbagger says


    Thanks for that – it makes a bit more sense. I hadn’t considered the whole pamphlet-as-a-popular-choice-for-spreading-wackaloon-philosophy option; we don’t see that much of that here.

    Probably a good thing…

  83. mayhempix says

    Posted by: Steve_C | January 15, 2009 6:19 PM
    “One of my favorite nutters is Alex Jones…”

    Yes, but Alex Jones is a nut with an agenda…. money. He has built a complete empire around 911 Inc. I’m convinced he’s cynical opportunist and says whatever will give his radio show higher ratings and drive the real nuts to his sight to buy his “exclusive” videos.

  84. Cowcakes says

    You bastard PZ. The least you could have done was give a firm warning about visiting that site. Although to be fair as it refused to display correctly in Firefox and opened up Internet Explorer before I got the full hideous effect.

    I should have stopped there but being the inquisitive type followed some of the links. Bloody hell (sorry SC) these people must just run on a very primitive nervous system as there is absolutely no evidence of higher brain function. If the government here in Australia is going to filter the web that site should be number one on the hit list.

    I fear for the sanity of anyone who sees it, not because I think they may believe the inanities contained therein but it may cause a matterantimatter like reaction with a sane mind.

  85. says

    The unicycle encyclopedia might be the best part. 2 billion pages, really? Shall we visit the calculations required for that?

    Assuming it takes about 1 minute to complete a single page by holding down the ‘f’ key, that’s a quick 2 billion minutes, or ~33 million man hours to complete the unicyclopedia. Assuming his craziness would ward off anyone from working for him, he alone can be expected to complete the project in a swift 3,805 years. Provided he does absolutely nothing else in his life besides work on it.

  86. Elwood says

    Outstanding. Thanks PZ, I’ve discovered a man who has PROVEN that evolution is ‘only a hypothesis’ and there is only ‘0.00002%’ of the data needed to prove the Theory. This proof is succinctly laid out on the page

    but if you can’t follow it you can buy the 20 page pamphlet. If that’s too skinny on detail, the 100 page booklet may be required. If, however, you’re really not getting it, the 1000 page book, or for the terminally insane, 3000 page encyclopedic version may be required for you to fully appreciate Dr Bisconti’s TOTAL LACK OF A CLUE.

    The Clarks at http://www.skepticsfieldguide.net/ would implode studying the Doctor’s work.

    He’s considerate enough to place a Warning regarding the website, but instead of apologising for designing the website under the Borel Infinite Monkey Law, he states that he will change his opinion as he learns new evidence. Just like Science.

    Oh, except for inviolate (I think he means inviolable… but I’m not the Doctor) facts like the existence of God.

    And Gay=Bad


  87. AntimatterSpork says

    In case any of you missed it, WebPsyops’s website was made in Microsoft Word.

    I think that really speaks for itself.

  88. Pboing says

    What part of “Claim of single 1st Day composed
    of Day, Night, Morning & Evening
    was a Lie, as they were Static points
    as 4 corners and did not rotate as
    Time motion” don’t you get. Sheeesh.

  89. Matt says

    This is really the ultimate in nuts. I think this is also the best example of fractal craziness. Click on any link, and you will find a page just as crazy and poorly constructed as any of the previous pages.

    On the ‘unicyclopedia’ page, they make the claim that they use chipless plasma stream technology, stemming from the Unified Field Theory. This amazing technology is so advanced, it is apparently only available to ‘L. F. Nexus and the Chicago Christian University’.


    I mean, ‘cybortron’?! That sounds like a character off of the fucking transformers shows!

    It’s really funny that you need special permission to view an explanation of the technology.

  90. Mike says

    This guy shows you why L. Ron. Hubbard and Scientology are so friggin amazing. L. Ron Hubbard made up a bunch of whacky sci-fi shit and created all this pseudo-scientific bull-caca tech crap similar to “Doc” Bisconti and should have failed just like Bisconti, but fortunately for RON, he knew the secert to making a successful nut-job religion… Hollywood.

  91. TonV says

    come on PZ …making fun of sick people isn’t nice. He is clearly in need of psychiatric treatment.

  92. Christophe Thill says

    What does “Dr” Bisconti does with his money? He buys domain names by the dozen. I’ve discovered yet another one:

    What is it supposed to be? Well, you can see for yourself. It’s not like it will take you very long. By the way, this super-secret safety force is where “Dr” Bisconti took his training.

    Oh but…

    I’ve just discovered the “OCC Solutions” webpage. Crazy. Just crazy. How does this guy find the time to create hundreds of webpages? Well of course some of them are only a few lines long…

    For your enjoyment, I suggest the “Pro-Evolution society”:

    Also an “organization” called PENSA, “the best of MENSA”;

    Is there really “method in his madness”? Well, perhaps. But then it’s a mad method.

  93. Laurel says

    Years later, I learned that one of the conspiracy nuts I waited on at Kinko’s is famous:


    His demeanor was very sane, not like the woman who once tried to run over me in the parking lot because…well, apaprently, “the Jews”?!

    @ Aquaria–before they get to you, they’ve had me make 18 copies of those letters even though they’re written on shreddy spiral notebook paper (and I am NOT to cut the shreds off), and they have inspected every page for little black dots, which are part of the conspiracy against them. All the sentences in the letters end with question marks, and I had to run the copies because the other guy working my shift “has evil cat eyes.” Also my hourly wage was probably about half of yours.

    Man, I miss that job.

  94. SteveM says

    Forgive my (Australian) ignorance, but why would someone at Kinko’s (a photocopying/binding place, yes?) be exposed to ‘this level of crazy’? Did something significant happen at one?

    I took it to mean that before the internet, these guys would have to go to Kinko’s to print up thousands of pamphlets to hand out on the street corner, in order to distribute their craziness.

  95. AndymanEC says

    If you have the chance, and you’re up for a laugh, do a little digging into “Dr” Bisconti’s background. Take the “Microtech Institute,” the source of one of his PhDs, for example. You’ll find a rarely-updated site (and poorly-designed for a computer science institute) that looks suspiciously like all his other sites and the sites of his numerous “Alma maters.”

    Of course, it’s moot. He addresses suspicion in his background page in a statement that can be summed up as “it doesn’t matter if my credentials are all fake, ‘cuz I done be smart.”

  96. AndymanEC says

    Under the “Evolution” heading (down in the disorganized mess-o’-pages) there’s a claim that the LF Nexus is working with “Rambo Hunters” a nationwide bounty hunter network that has gathered 10,000 bounty hunters to enforce his “no evolution in science class” edict.

    Gee, I wonder why the website for a nation-wide bounty hunter network (that’s at least 10,000 strong) has only a few statements about going after “immoral” activity (like the anti-sodomite division), and no actual information about bounty hunting? Oh, and also looks like every other website linked to from the Nexus.

  97. David Marjanovi? says

    Has this one been mentioned yet?

    Electric Windmill Car?


    Wow. 0.9 Tc, and I’m serious. Is that just Safari, or does that page refuse to scroll for everyone else, too? To continue reading, I had to grab the scroll bar and keep it grabbed. That’s not the case on endwaronearth.com, though.

    Check it out, people. He wants 100 wives so that they can inspire (!) him to find “the” cure for cancer and a way to overcome gravity.

    Best of all, he really writes in Comic Sans!

    The page for “is masturbation a sin” is simply amazing.


    Quite so, but right on the top it says:

    Before you read this article, read The “M” Word for some background information.

    …so let’s do him the favor:

    Sensitive Terminology

    For the sake of our less mature readers we have coined the terms “biosis,” “biotic,” “bioticity,” and “heterobiotic” to use in place of the word “sex” and its derivatives.

    I rest my case.

  98. rsm says

    I haven’t laughed this much in a long time. My family is wondering what is wrong with me.

    If that’s not satire at least the writer(s) is not killing trees passing around leaflets on streetcorners.

  99. Everbleed says

    Maybe it’s just ’cause it’s Friday and I’m shot to shit, but I think todays pharyngula is (for me at least) one of the best all around pharyngula’s I have ever enjoyed, and I have enjoyed many. But OMG TimeCube. OMG OMDarwin WTF?!?!? Someone really needs to study the brain that can do TimeCube.

    PZ… I don’t know how you do it… sifting all this shit out and getting it to us. I only hope you keep it up and have a patient family.

    You nurture us all. May you live long. May you be happy… even if you make the rest of us sad. At least we get to laugh.

    Thank you.

  100. Last Hussar says

    Paul McCartney knows about the suppression of the Electricwindmillcar and is paid off by the governments of Britain and the USA not to write a song about this.

    BEST. LUNACY. EVEH. Because if there is one person who can bring down the US government…

    Lots of them links save in my Favourites (under humour, of course) along with the ‘Earth is not moving’ (for which thise with an Irony deficiency attacked me when I posted, thinking I was an US citizen).

    I especially liked the “We are a super secret organisation. Here is our web page.”

    US pop, approx 300m. UK pop 61m.

    So why do you out strip us by more than 5:1 in looney webmasters?

    I was really disappointed with Sexual Karate. I thought it would teach me how to chop a plank in two with my penis.

    Does anyone understand why masterbation is a sin. I followed the ‘if you choose to do it’ arguement, but he never said why masterbation, rather than, say, opening a door.

  101. Sgt Skepper says

    HA! That cannot be a serious site. I really really hope it’s just a really elaborate satire. The following quote nearly made me fall off my chair with laughter:

    “Note that there are only three races in the world – hobkobb, coggerbot, and tukertoc”

    Weren’t they characters in the BFG?