Comments

  1. says

    I wonder how it would cope with the concept of provisional ethics? Maybe it would open a wormhole to another dimension.

  2. Lana says

    I am so going to work “nosedive of doom” into a conversation sometime today. It shouldn’t be too hard. I’m a bankruptcy lawyer.

  3. says

    Negative morality scaling factors to the rescue! I just knew that negative numbers would prove useful in the long run. (If I use imaginary numbers instead, could I please be orthogonal to all of this?)

  4. Eric says

    Woo! I got the questions right! (not that I would do any of those things, just that I knew the right answer)

  5. says

    Eric | November 25, 2008 8:36 AM

    Woo! I got the questions right! (not that I would do any of those things, just that I knew the right answer)

    Well… la-ti-dah, Mister Fancypants. What’s the matter? Can’t walk the walk?

  6. says

    I think this is pretty funny, but in some cases, I wonder how much it will reinforce these behaviors. There are some people I can picture out there screaming “I picked yes! It must be broken.”

  7. DLC says

    Uh, right.
    “I especially liked the old testamant, with all it’s ultra-violence and gutti-works.”

  8. says

    um.

    your hair is longer now huh?

    what happened to PIRATES ON THE INTERNET?

    5018285379319857692234519

    no disenumeration woo hoo!

  9. JakeS says

    Would have been funnier if they hadn’t skipped the middle six questions, but they probably were trying not to make it too long.

  10. eddie says

    Satan is an anagram of santa. He must feel ashamed to be associated with these nasty xians and their horrible sky fairy.

    Also, re #4 “…could I please be orthogonal to all of this?”

    That would give you the choice of lawful-neutral or chaotic-neutral.

  11. spence-bob says

    What a surprise – Jeebocrats stealing Bill Watterson’s work.

    But I guess theft is okay when it’s in the service of one’s favorite set of superstitious fairy tales. Funny how that works.

  12. mayhempix says

    Version 2.1

    Fixes the meltdown bug and
    turns you and your family into pillars of salt if you fail.

  13. Badjuggler says

    OK, you made me Google the name Bill Watterson. It’s only a frackin’ comic strip, people!

  14. says

    It’s built incorrectly. It has a series of lights that indicate a smooth gradient between Satan & God.

    Real Christians (TM) know that a *real* Moral Master would have just one light. And it would glow either black or white.

    Obviously this is a fraud.

  15. Milton says

    “OK, you made me Google the name Bill Watterson. It’s only a frackin’ comic strip, people!”

    No. It’s the best comic strip ever.
    =)

  16. tsg says

    Real Christians (TM) know that a *real* Moral Master would have just one light. And it would glow either black or white.

    Just curious. How does a light glow black?

  17. chgo_liz says

    Some days it is particularly clear why I make a point of visiting this blog, despite my non-formal-training in the sciences past a rudimentary level. Thank you.

  18. Ubi Dubium says

    Just curious. How does a light glow black?

    You just have to belieeeeve that it does, and then you’ll see it.

  19. says

    Just curious. How does a light glow black?

    Well, that’s just what the Marketing Specs say.

    It’s up to Engineering to work out the minor details.

  20. tsg says

    Well, that’s just what the Marketing Specs say.

    It’s up to Engineering to work out the minor details.

    Ah, now I understand. I routinely get marketing specs that I am supposed to implement that say, in essence, “I want all my groceries in one bag and I don’t want the bag to be heavy.”

  21. tsg says

    You know, this gives me an idea. I’m going to market a “faith meter” that consists of a box with a light bulb in it that isn’t connected to anything. If your faith is strong enough, the light will light. I’d really like to see how many people see the light (pun intended).

    It will retail for $249.95.

    If I only didn’t have a conscience….

  22. says

    tsg,

    I work in the video security industry. We suffer from overinflated expectations due to popular entertainment.

    Marketing doesn’t understand why you can’t just keep blowing up an image until you can see the bad guy reflected in the victim’s eyes.

    “But I saw it on CSI last night! Why can’t you do that?”

  23. GuyIncognito says

    I’ve yet to see it, so I’ll just preempt it:

    “If God does it or commands it to be done, it is good. Morality is only for us mere mortals.”

    Just wanted to get it out of the way.

  24. says

    For some reason, I kept thinking of a Voight-Kampff test: “You’re walking through a desert when you see a tortoise in the sand. . . .” It looks like I’m a Satanic replicant.

  25. jimmiraybob says

    Just curious. How does a light glow black?

    If you had perfect faith you wouldn’t ask such morally depraved questions. However, for the sake of your immortal soul I would refer you to the 60’s.

  26. says

    Calladus @ #25

    Oh god, I remember that episode. I couldn’t even shout at the screen, I was so overwhelmed with the wrongness of it.

  27. boognish says

    “OK, you made me Google the name Bill Watterson. It’s only a frackin’ comic strip, people!”

    BLASPHEMY!

  28. tsg says

    Marketing doesn’t understand why you can’t just keep blowing up an image until you can see the bad guy reflected in the victim’s eyes.

    “But I saw it on CSI last night! Why can’t you do that?”

    “Because that’s fiction?”

    Oh god, I remember that episode. I couldn’t even shout at the screen, I was so overwhelmed with the wrongness of it.

    I didn’t see it, but it sounds like they stole it from Blade Runner.

    Although I think the worst had to be in Enemy of the State where the bad guys, using super duper software, rotated an image around 180 degrees to see what was in Wil Smith’s shopping bag that was hidden from the camera by Wil Smith. All I could think was, if they had software that could see what the camera wasn’t aimed at, why do they need the camera?

  29. tsg says

    If you had perfect faith you wouldn’t ask such morally depraved questions.

    That would explain it.

    However, for the sake of your immortal soul I would refer you to the 60’s.

    Oh, no you don’t. I am not getting sucked into flashbacks of “highlighter parties” again. Crap. Here they come.

    Damn you.

  30. Brian says

    Nothing beats one old episode of C.H.I.P.S. The baddies have this cool laser that they use to blind the victims. The baddies aim the laser at Ponch, who sees the beam coming, and DUCKS.

  31. jimmiraybob says

    Oh, no you don’t. I am not getting sucked into flashbacks of “highlighter parties” again. Crap. Here they come.

    Damn you.

    My work is done. Bwahahahahahahh! [brandishes pitchfork menacingly]

  32. bezoar says

    And the next version includes instructions in the guiltless mastery of fish hook bating, It’s called the “Moral mastur-well you get it.

  33. Ed says

    Regarding comments 20, 23, and 24:

    Haven’t you heard of a black light?
    For the record, I’m an engineer. ;-)