Stuff is accumulating in my mailbox far faster than I can put it out here with commentary, so I’m just going to dump the recent pile of links here rather than my usual tactic of simply letting them disappear by neglect.
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The McCain campaign is handing out Christian voter guides. Vote for McCain because he’s not immoral!
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Chuck Norris’s nephew got an F in fifth grade because he wrote an essay on evolution that instead said god created the earth…and the teacher had a degree from the “University of Berkeley”.
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Christopher Hitchens denounces Palin. No surprise, but the man can turn a phrase.
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At least one time when a Democratic president was accused of treason, it did not end well.
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Scott Bloch was too radically conservative for even the Bush White House. Things could be worse.
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In the annals of crazy Catholicism: “Judgment Day for us is on its way. Those 47 million children our nation destroyed are still living. We have destroyed their bodies, but their souls are still alive. When our Lord comes again, they may very well be there to judge us.”
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Did you know there was a Creation Festival Tour, a planned nationwide Christian rock tour celebrating Genesis? Neither did I. Neither did anyone, apparently: it was cancelled for lack of interest.
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In the ongoing saga of Webster Cook and the forces of Catholic darkness at UCF, his impeachment from the student senate has been overturned.
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Where did Palin come from? Ambition and gullible conservative pundits.
I hope, for the sake of the USA, & the rest of the World, that Senator Obama wins the election. The alternative is too hideous to contemplate.
So the case of against Webster Cook turned out to be tried in a rushed kangaroo court fashion. Not surprising. Following procedures takes time, and may result in the “wrong” verdict when all the evidence is in.
A rock tour celebrating Genesis? C’mon, there’s been no point in that since Peter Gabriel left.
Carnival of Douchebaggery?
A rock tour celebrating Genesis? C’mon, there’s been no point in that since Peter Gabriel left.
Was he the guy who studied geology, got a PhD in it, & was at the same time a young Earth Creationist? Does this mean that he’s come to his senses?
And they’ll say, “Wow, thanks for sending us to heaven directly without having to worry about child abuse or horrible diseases or crippling injuries, or being sent to Hell after a very sinful life or Purgatory after a somewhat sinful life, or just three score and ten years of life that even at its best would have been way more painful than being ushered immediately into Paradise and the Glory of His Presence! You let us win without having to play the game! Thank you! (And thanks especially to the Pope for getting us out of Limbo, which was a bit boring.)”
This is how meesed up the Republicians are. Adam Brinkley is responsible for brining us Sarah Palin. In an article from the New Yorker.
Brickley’s family, once evangelical Christians, now practice what he calls “Messianic Judaism.” They believe that Jesus is the Messiah, but they also observe the Jewish holidays and attend synagogue; as Brickley puts it, “Jesus was Jewish, so to be like Him you need to be Jewish, too.” Brickley said that “the hand of God” played a role in choosing Palin: “The longer I worked on it the less I felt I was driving it. Something else was at work.”
The article is here…
http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2008/10/27/081027fa_fact_mayer?currentPage=all
I may be mistaken, but those folks are the “Jews for Jesus” people.
My wife’s Aunt and Uncle were into that strangeness.
Did I see the word “Crazy” in this post? Yes. Yes, I did.
Well, here is Crazy to end all Crazy. Check out this post from Making Light, unless you value your sanity, in which case you might want to delegate the task to someone whose sanity you don’t value.
rickley’s family, once evangelical Christians, now practice what he calls “Messianic Judaism.” They believe that Jesus is the Messiah, but they also observe the Jewish holidays and attend synagogue; as Brickley puts it, “Jesus was Jewish, so to be like Him you need to be Jewish, too.”
Sounds like they’re Christians who just want to get out of work on the Jewish holidays.
On second review, I may be off on that.
RE: The Creation Festival Tour…
*howling laughter*
hey,
Maybe there is a god and the choice of Sarah Palin was guided by him.
Seems to me he is very clearly saying he wants Obama to win.
Re: Chuck Norris.
Fair enough, kid. I went to a Catholic school and got an F on my “what god means to me” report in freshman religion class. =P
Glad to hear the Cook ruling was overturned, I think the vatican thugs will find railroading him a bit harder the second time around. Or at least I hope so.
So this is why WMD can be found anywhere you care to mention.
Chuck Norris on his nephew:
“[R]ather than believe that he was a glorified ape, he believed that he was a child of God made in His image. He is in Army Intelligence now, serving our country in Iraq.”
Oh dear…
Dammit! They canceled the Creation Tour?
I just bought a new Tin Foil Hat, and everything.
I know it’s not listed above but i just find it too good not to repeat here. Got this from a thread at Ed’s blog.
Ted Steven convicted of 7 counts.
“Prison, it’s not like a big building, it’s more like a series of cubes”
What will the Christian Right think if Obama wins? After all, they are praying fervently that God do His Thang. Will they see Obama as His Choice? Or will they pop-up here with their personal anecdotes on how they lost their faith and came to the conclusion that The Big Dude doesn’t exist?
If you read the crazy bishop’s editorial, you’ll learn that he was born during the Great Depression, i.e., he’s really old. This lines up with my observation that >80% of the people I see with anti-abortion bumper stickers are over 65. Perhaps this will start dying out as a culture war issue in the next 10-15 years?
@ #19
An Obama victory is unlikely to shake the faithfull as they have been preprogramed to attribute such and occcurace to the devil and his minions. Curious how God is supposed to be all powerfull but satan seems to score victories anyway.
And here’s some more Misopalinism:
Hahahahahaha!
@19: Satan did it… Free will… Turned away from God… Wrath to follow.
Semi-OT
The association of wingnut frontier barber-surgeons that Ron Paul belongs to have published a thing saying Obama is hypnotizing people.
In those voter guides: They say that if no acceptable candidate is running, the voter should either vote for the candidate “who seems least likely to be able to advance immoral legislation,” or not vote at all in that contest.
Absolutely. Please do not vote if you are trying to follow the advice in the voter guides. Just stay home. God will take care of everything, I promise.
Point 1 (the Joe McCain 911 story) is absurd. Viewing the linked video, it looks like what happened was this: someone made a stupid 911 call purporting to complain about traffic; the 911 operator rang back and got a voicemail message saying “Hi. This is Joe McCain. I can’t take this message now because I’m involved in a very important family political project.” They have no evidence whatsoever that this was actually Joe McCain. With a voicemail message like that, it’s far more likely to be a hoax aimed at discrediting the McCain campaign. But of course, the media has to jump to conclusions.
And even in the unlikely event that Joe McCain did actually make this call, do you really blame his brother for his choices?
I find it ironic whenever someone links to “Prose before Ho’s” website in a critique of hateful behavior. This is a pro-Obama site that came into being in the height of the anti-Hillary hate-fest. We are supposed to be selective in our “isms”? Sexism-good, funny even, racism-bad, only bigots do it, not funny. I appreciate the graphic work “Prose before Ho’s” does but in principle do not link to them. Hatred of women, and the minimizing of misogynist speech is emblematic of the stupidity that unfortunately is not limited to the GOP.
I see that Saint is our latest anti Obama troll.
Saint, if you don’t include McSame’s bad qualities in your posts, I won’t pay any attention to them.
No but it sure as hell is funny it it is him that he thinks he can call 911 over traffic and then say Fuck you to the operator because he gets called on his stupidity.
Yeah, I had heard of the Creation Festival Tour. And I wish it were canceled, but unfortunately it’s just the Coliseum show that was announced as canceled, not the tour.
Glen D
http://tinyurl.com/2kxyc7
Heaven, the game? Apparently, Jesus likes gold and porn stars even more than most humans do. And all the angels, including Jesus, are white, have blond hair, and blue eyes (when they’re not glowing). It looks like it’s trying to be a Christian Science version of Myst.
It’s almost as hilarious as the woman who called 911 on Burger King when they wouldn’t make her a Western Burger.
@ 25: Joe McCain did make this call:
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/10/25/joe-mccain-apologizes-for_n_137794.html
The Bishop re abortion:
This is quoted in the Catholic fliers as well. They can keep their fucked-up, authoritarian “moral” priorities. When it comes to public policy, their arguments don’t have a secular leg to stand on and they know it, so they have to find suckers to buy into the role of faith warriors.
It sure did for Andrew Carnegie and his descendants.
And government goons!And Pinkertons! Don’t forget Pinkertons!
Aaaaaaah. Enjoy, poor people!
Okay, I really don’t want to see McCain and/or Palin anywhere near the white house after the last several months of this campaign either. But all the same, speaking as someone who’s been stuck on that bridge, I’m actually kinda sympathetic over the 911 thing.
They could set up a parallel service, just for this. 811 or somethin’. You call it, you wind up in this conference room arranged for collective venting.
“At least one time when a Democratic president was accused of treason, it did not end well.”
I’m certain that’s what some in the GOP are hoping, at least quietly. The Secret Service is hopefully cognizant of the greater threat and is taking appropriate measures.
From the New Yorker article about the rise of Sarah Palin comes the unintentionally hilarious quote of the day:
You’ve got to be freaking kidding me. She arranged the luncheon for the express purpose of meeting and selling herself to the these people, but she didn’t understand the significance of it? Give me a break. Palin is a dumbass about, well, most things, but she’s up there with the best of them when it comes to political maneuvering. It’s hard to see this quote as anything but sexism.
“If I value the good of the economy and my current lifestyle more than I do the right to life itself, then I am in trouble.”
It’s like there basically admiting, “Yes, we will fuck you over and make you poor but Jesus loves poor people so it’s cool.” Talk about the opiate of the masses.
We have destroyed their bodies, but their souls are still alive.
If that’s the case, then what’s the big deal?
Oh, Chuck Norris, is there any profoundly enlightening discovery in biology that you can’t kick in the face for the glory of Jesus?
Walton –
FAIL.
You might want to look this stuff up before running blindly to the defense…
Woo! Hurrah for Christian rock tours getting cancelled, especially in my hometown of Bloomington, IL. Please tell me there are fellow Pharyngulites in Bloomington/Normal, there are just way too many fundamentalist nuts in that town and it needs some godless folk to balance it out!
#32, thanks for link. Notice this: “McCain told WTOP that he thought his cell phone was on mute.’I did not mean to swear at the officers themselves,’ ”
So, he thinks he needs to apologize for swearing, not for misusing emergency services because he was in a snit about waiting in traffic. Hello, sense of entitlement. Just another data point adding to the idea that the McCains think they are above the little people.
@ Sean Peters
..ummm… because….
Wait… hold on… if I cross my eyes and read the quote again, I’m sure I can see the obvious misogyny…
I think it’s labeled as sexism because hey, she’s just a cute little woman organizing a lunch the way they do, who would think it would be more significant than that? She simply didn’t worry her pretty little head about it. Much more subtle than, say, calling her a cunt, but still possibly there.
Saint:
You forgot to use the Comic Sans font.
#38:
I keep wondering the same thing. If they’re now in paradise (since limbo went away) and don’t have to suffer the human condition on earth, WTF?!??
Hitchens last paragraph “says it all”
This is what the Republican Party has done to us this year: It has placed within reach of the Oval Office a woman who is a religious fanatic and a proud, boastful ignoramus. Those who despise science and learning are not anti-elitist. They are morally and intellectually slothful people who are secretly envious of the educated and the cultured. And those who prate of spiritual warfare and demons are not just “people of faith” but theocratic bullies. On Nov. 4, anyone who cares for the Constitution has a clear duty to repudiate this wickedness and stupidity.
Worse than that; he isn’t apologizing for swearing, he’s apologizing for not muting his phone.
Not “I’m sorry I swore at you”, instead “I’m sorry you heard me swear at you”.
SteveM
That said… there’s more than enough reason for me not to vote for McCain already… I’m not about to hold him accountable because his brother’s an asshole. Unless he defends him or his behavior…
Good catch, SteveM.
That said… there’s more than enough reason for me not to vote for McCain already…
I can’t understand how there could be anybody left for whom any new story can sway their opinion. People who haven’t made up their minds yet really haven’t been paying attention. This is just good old-fashioned pointing at a jerk and laughing.
@19 Cheerful Nihilist
If things go the way they want, that is god showing his power, and if it doesn’t go the way the fundies want, it is god testing them. See how convienient that is?
As intelligent people continue to turn away, it’s being reduced to the opiate of the asses.
That said… there’s more than enough reason for me not to vote for McCain already… I’m not about to hold him accountable because his brother’s an asshole.
I agree, I did not mean to say it was any reason to not vote for McCain. It is just that these “unapologies” are becoming a pet peeve of mine. It almost seems that no one apologizes for their actions anymore, just for getting caught at it.
Smotzer @ #7 posted, “This is how meesed up the Republicians are.”
The word “meesed” is mis-spelt. It should be capitalized.
@ 42, @ 48:
And Joe McCain’s greatest concern about the whole thing seems to be that he might have “hurt the campaign”.
Ferous Patella at #55:
Ed Meesed, indeed.
No kings,
Robert
That’s actually fairly traditional among dishonest types though. Eg criminals being sorry for getting caught and not for committing the crime and the religious.
See Aquinas – who had no good intention for making Christianity less dishonest and less ignorant, but merely advised that its proponents shouldn’t get caught telling falsehoods (ie that they should be more obscure and weaselly in their falsehood-telling, like sophisticated theologians). He was merely sorry that Christians got caught out being wrong, not that they (and Christianity itself) were wrong through and through.
Posted by: Ferrous Patella | October 28, 2008
Smotzer @ #7 posted, “This is how meesed up the Republicians are.”
The word “meesed” is mis-spelt. It should be capitalized.
Takes me back to the Reagan years. I had a friend who who regularly say “I hate Meeses to pieces!” Just think of Edward Meese and the Reagan’s era version of John Ashcroft. Just look up the porn investigation.
Looking at that anti-Kennedy leaflet I noticed that it complained that President Kennedy had been “lax in enforcing Communist Registration laws”.
This caused me to double-take, and so I found myself looking at this Wikipedia article.
I was astonished to find that in 1954 President Eisenhauer had signed a bill making the Communist Party illegal in the United States.
That is truly freaky. Sorry but sometimes I think America is absolutely insane.
On the abortion issue, why do they assume that the aborted will judge those who support abortion harshly? After all, by aborting them, they’ve been spared the agonies of life, have managed to dodge sin, thus ensuring their entrance into heaven, and got into heaven a lot faster.
#60:
Yes Tony, tossing a a stone or two at our examples of extremist nuttery is fun. Just remember:glass houses.
“…consistent with Christian moral teaching… non-negotiable issues… embryonic stem cell research, human cloning”
Huh. I must have missed those passages in the bible.
sorry if you all know about the alternative book of creation but I think I just wet myself
http://baetzler.de/humor/book_of_creation.var
Hey, ‘saint’, that’s that’s the second time, and this is the second blog, that I’ve seen your dishonest ‘Misopalinism’ post on, today. How many other sites have you spammed with it?
Fuck right off, won’t you?
“McCain told WTOP that he thought his cell phone was on mute.’I did not mean to swear at the officers themselves,'”
Heh. So he called 911, complained about traffic, then during that pause while the operator was talking to him, he took the phone down from his ear, pressed the “mute” button, put it back to his ear, said an expletive, then hung up. Yeah, sure he did.
“Did you know there was a Creation Festival Tour, a planned nationwide Christian rock tour celebrating Genesis? ”
Nifty. I’d love to hear their take on “Jesus He Knows Me”.
“Those 47 million children our nation destroyed are still living. We have destroyed their bodies, but their souls are still alive. When our Lord comes again, they may very well be there to judge us.”
The more I think about this, the more perplexing it gets. So, do the souls of the aborted fetuses grow up then in heaven? What sort of environment is that — I thought we needed “pain and suffering” to form character. Did the fetuses develop personalities, or did they already have those personalities the moment they were conceived? Do we ALL have pre-existing personalities which merely unfold after we’re born?
They can judge and evaluate? How? Are we born secretly knowing how to think and reason like adults? Or we can think and reason like the adults we will be while we’re in the womb, but birth is so traumatic we forget it all?
This makes no sense. It’s on the level of a child imagining that they looked down from heaven before they were born, and pointed to the parents they wanted, and God said ok.
It’s the old “gift of life” fallacy. In fact, you can’t compare “existence” to “never existed.” It’s like asking what’s greater, the number 1 or the empty set?
The empty set =/= 0. It is empty.
I cannot say that I am better off alive than before I existed.
Apparently Heaven is the best place there could possibly be, but we can’t send babies and the terminally ill there “before their time”, or else…well…it’s not terribly clear…
WTF is it with these Catholic bishops? They head up one of the largest pedophile organizations in the world that’s been fined millions of dollars for sodomizing children AND covering it up FOR YEARS and they still think they have some sort of moral cache to tell you and me how to live our lives and what to think.
Pablo #68 wrote:
But that’s what’s so screwy here. It’s not that there were potential people ‘who never got a chance to exist.” The bishop is claiming that they DO exist — all of them, right now — and they reason and think enough to ‘judge.’
The presumption is that they’re going to judge us harshly, because we never let them get out of heaven, poor things. We killed the fleshly body that would have allowed them to go through horrible tests designed to GET to heaven, and instead KEPT them in heaven, in a state of perpetual happiness and bliss — and so of course they’re pissed off about it.
Frankly, this whole scenario fails on so many levels, it’s hard to know what part to start on…
I seem to recall the Bible specifically saying Jesus didn’t like adultery or divorce or rich people.
It’s difficult to say how noisome this is.
I wonder what were the opinions of mother in the midst of poverty ?
‘Poverty is great’ is pure shit. I grew up on the edges of poverty and ‘creativity, generosity and faith’ do not make up for foreclosure, debt and fear.
I can only imagine how horrible it is for those in extreme poverty.
Saint, do you actually bother to check out original stories yourself, or do you just repeat all this crap verbatim from conservative talking heads?
There’s a reason this stupid fucking “tire pressure” meme has faded off of the more rational conservative media – any idiot can see that the actual statement was quite mild and common-sense-ical. This is the actual quote:
At no point did Obama say that inflating tires was his energy plan. He never said it would make us energy independent. He is clearly using it as an example of ways people can conserve fuel, which it is.
And by most estimates, including the US Department of Energy, properly inflating car tires would improve gas mileage by about 3.3 % (see http://www.sfgate.com/cgi-bin/article.cgi?f=/c/a/2008/08/05/MN1S124RIS.DTL&type=politics) and save us more oil than we would gain from offshore drilling (see http://www.time.com/time/politics/article/0,8599,1829354,00.html).
You know where I got this information, saint? Googling a few key terms. It really isn’t that hard to check you fucking facts – I would suggest that you start.
Slightly off-topic, but thought some might like this YouTube clip: Wassup 2008
Warning it’s based on the older Bud Light commercial “Wassup!”
Yeah, Sastra. The worst part is that they are only on their way out of heaven, having never done a wrong thing, and the xians have condemned them to an eternity of hell for not being baptised.
Evil child abusers!
Also, for those dumping on saint, dump away. But he’s just running interference for the real adversary.
If it is the same guy, and it sounds like it, check out Walton_One profile as a conservapedophile admin, or an admin on english wiki (“I’m a wikidemocrat” = scientific facts are subject to mob rule), or spanish equivalent (franco wasn’t a mass murderer, honest).
I can’t understand how there could be anybody left for whom any new story can sway their opinion. People who haven’t made up their minds yet really haven’t been paying attention.
David Sedaris, in a humor piece in the current New Yorker wrote: “Being undecided in this election is like being offered a choice between chicken or a plate of shit with bits of broken glass in it, and asking how the chicken is cooked.” (Slight paraphrase)
Sastra:
Not according to God, as transcribed by His prophet Isaiah:
But perhaps this only applies to Isaiah’s own son, Mahershalalhashbaz (“Hash” to his friends).
If anyone wants to see screenshots of the Heaven game without watching the video at the site, I posted them (along with some nice, sarcastic comments) at http://www.sanityproject.com/2008/10/heaven-game.html
Cheers.
Josh, thanks for the Heaven screen shots. Your snarky comments are hi-larious!
Rey Fox posted:
‘Nifty. I’d love to hear their take on “Jesus He Knows Me”.’
I’m guessing it would be “Jesus He Knows Me (In The Biblical Sense)”.
That’s right. 47 million kids slaughtered, and the Catholics are crazy for suggesting -like Lincoln- that some Divine retribution might be justified.
You’re an assbite. What’s new?
That 47 million kids sent directly to eternal Paradise, without the pain of life or the risk that sin might have prevented them from attaining their heavenly reward. Explain how that is bad again?
Pharynguphile
What about all the “kids” that are frozen in fertility clinics
Don’t forget them.
Or the millions of children who die of hunger and malnutrition every year…?
It isn’t just McCain supporters who do stupid or unpleasant things:
http://hillbuzz.wordpress.com/2008/10/26/obama-followers-vandalize-homes-in-gainesville/
Not to mention the hanging of an effigy of Sarah Palin.
Don’t get me wrong – these are the actions of a deranged minority, and say nothing about Obama himself or his qualities as a candidate. But neither do the actions of McCain’s brother or of a few of his more idiotic supporters.
Oh you mean, like the whole hoard of McCain supporters who swarmed 2 Obama supporters in Florida after a rally and threatened to kill them.
Fuck McCain isn’t excatly a Yay Obama! message. What proof do you have that they’re Obama supporters? The could be wingnut christians who think McCain isn’t convervative enough.