Be Still and Know


I was in the parking lot of home despot, when I saw this sign at a distance.  Initially I thought it said, “I AM GOD.”  Strange place for fundie horseshit, I mused, until the actual product was revealed: “FARM FRESH SOD,” where the words farm and fresh were de-emphasized.

I had been primed to see these words by this ornament dangling from the rearview mirror of my ride’s coach:

Sit still and know that if you misbehave, jesus will fuck you up.  Bes’ believe.

I like to mix the ideas.  KNOW THAT I AM SOD, THE FARM FRESH GOD, like a parody of this jam:

If you haven’t thought of that song since your homeboy in college DL’d a midi of it in 1989, you’re welcome.

Comments

  1. M. Currie says

    The message on that butterfly is farm fresh something but I think “sod” only euphemistically.

    I think “Farm Fresh Sod” should become a new euphemism for most things political I see our fearless leader is preparing to lay down another roll of farm fresh sod! Maybe a bumper sticker. The more often seen, the less ambiguous it becomes.

  2. Pierce R. Butler says

    Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.

    — Psalms 46:10

    I tend to interpret that as if spoken by a cop:

    Freeze, muthafucka!”