Thank you, God, for Two-Oh-One-Six—
Yes, thank God for one more year;
Thank God, empowered racists
Won the nation, thanks to fear.
But if God should take the credit,
God’s to blame, then, if it sucked—
And if this year is God’s handiwork
Then God can just get fucked.
Let’s give thanks to God for Breitbart
And for Nazis, and the Klan;
Let’s give thanks that Trump’s election
Means we end the age of Man;
It’s the Fire’s turn to cleanse us
And the flame is heaven-sent
And if this year is God’s doing,
Well then, God can just get bent.
Let’s give thanks for roasted turkeys
Brussels sprouts, and candied yams;
(Let’s admit, for non-white heathens,
That we give no fucks nor damns);
We’ve got stuffing and potatoes,
And some green beans if you wish.
But if this year is God’s cooking,
It’s a fucking awful dish.
Thank you God, that Trump’s elected;
Thank you, God, that this is it—
You’ve made clear that you’re an asshole,
And your favor just means shit.
We can pray till we are weary
But it’s Donald all the same;
On behalf of true believers…
Fuck you god, cos you’re to blame.
There was not a lot to thank people for in 2016. I thank people for voting, but there were not the right numbers in the right states. I thank the people who helped me through the year, but frankly I’d have sacrificed that for some different outcomes in other states. I thank my family for the one thing that made 2016 a net positive… well, for me, anyway. One weekend in 2016 was enough to overcome the rest of it… and that is privilege.
Anyway… anyone who wants to toast this year can do so. And the great thing is, they can also, in their very next breath, recite this verse, and say “Fuck you, God”.
I have one very big thing to thank a whole lot of people for in 2016. So thank you, all of you! I love you all! Now…. get to work. Because nothing is normal now. I’ll be right there with you. Happy whatever you want it to be (yes, even if that is not happy). Let me know what I can do (I don’t always know). Oh, yeah, and… God? Fuck you.
chigau (ever-elliptical) says
AMEN!
Other than thanks for Cuttlefish,
Fuck you god.
memehunter says
Sorry, this outpouring of vitriol just doesn’t do it for me. There is no God. Why waste all those F words on a nonentity? It’s just plain ugly. If fuck means sexual intercourse, generally an act of love, why is that the worst thing one can say to or about something? If rot has set into the American psyche, it’s the doing of deteriorating human minds and their accompanying emotional baggage. People have replaced thinking and reasoning with blind feeling, egging each other on to fear and hatred that is the fuel for mass hysteria and holocausts. Don’t feed it. Don’t give in to it. Don’t reduce your great intellect and skill with poetic language to wrapping yourself in helpless rage and infantile public splattering of vulgarity, poisoning all around you. The world is not hopeless. You can be a bastion for preserving reason and goodness. You can help cleanse the world’s soul with positive ideas and positive energy. People need that spark of enlightenment when things look dark. We look to you to be that light, not sound and fury.
Cuttlefish says
Not this time.
Alexander Pope’s “Essay on Criticism” speaks to this verse:
Coarse language is called for at times. I’ve said before, sometimes “appropriate use of language” means beating someone about the head and shoulders with the Sunday New York Times. Trump is more worthy of “The Dunciad” (again, Pope) than “The Illiad”. No beautiful language here.
And “fuck”, while a marvelously multipurpose word, is not synonymous with “make love”, as any dime-store romance novelist will attest. Meaning is use, use is meaning, and “fuck” has evolved and spread into many niches. The person who responds to “I will fuck you up” with “I don’t give a fuck” is not talking about sex, and both parties know it.
Just for fun…
https://youtu.be/s_osQvkeNRM
StevoR says
Off topic but :
Merry New Year.. & happy whatever you celebrate and have some good days Digital Cuttlefish – & thankyou.
Great rhymes and great blog and know that you are appreciated by me.
StevoR says
PS. In fact, I wish you have *all* good days i hope & not just “some.”
Wishing you and my fellow commentators here the best for whatever little it may be worth.