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Jul 13 2014

God reveals himself through an eggplant

A restaurant employee in New Orleans was startled to discover the word ‘God’ formed by the seeds of an eggplant that he had cut into.

Gods-own-Eggplant

Chef Jermarcus Brady couldn’t believe what he was seeing. “I saw a miraculous image formed by the seeds,” said Jermarcus Brady. “It spelled out the word God!” Chef Brady has many responsibilities, one being cutting, salting and sauteing eggplant.

Restauranteur Gino Marino was equally impressed by the statistical implausibility of a message-bearing aubergine.

“You could cut one million eggplants and you’d probably never see that again, it’s that rare,” said Marino. “God is within us and he has different ways of showing it in our lives, and this is just one way of showing it.”

It never seems to strike these people to ask why their god chooses to reveal himself in such trivial and useless ways instead of, say, growing out the limb of an amputee or revealing cures for cancer.

Whenever I read of one of these god sightings that so excite the faithful (in another case, a woman’s curls formed the word ‘god’), I am reminded of this classic sketch from That Mitchell and Webb Look.

19 comments

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  1. 1
    Seth

    If you inspect the aubergine, you can see that the ‘G’ has been altered near the top (either through malfeasance or, possibly, just through the seeds falling out in the cooking process). Put the missing seeds back in, and you have something that looks a lot like the mirror image of the ‘letter’ on the right, which isn’t exactly a ‘D’ either. Thus the aubergine’s seeds evidently form a ring pattern, reflected via bilateral symmetry.

    Therefore, finding a seed pattern that resembles a three-letter, nearly-bilaterally-symmetric word such as ‘GOD’ is actually inevitable, rather than a miracle.

  2. 2
    jaytheostrich

    Actually, it was the aubergine’s reaction to being cut, expressed in text.. GOD! Why Me!

  3. 3
    Marcus Ranum

    This is my favorite:
    http://www.ranum.com/linkedimages/jesus-dogbutt.jpg

    You can get extra credit by saying it’s mohammed if you want to offend people who don’t like dogs.

  4. 4
    Al Dente

    The egg plant is nothing. Just last week I was eating a bowl of Alphabits Cereal® when I read the following in the bowl:

    xⁿ+yⁿ=zⁿ I have discovered a truly remarkable proof which this bowl is too small to contain

  5. 5
    DsylexicHippo

    Conclusion: God speaks English.

  6. 6
    Snap

    Is that you Pierre?

  7. 7
    ahcuah

    Also note that if you cut an eggplant crosswise like that, all the seeds will be in a circular-like pattern. So this pattern really isn’t very far from the norm and well-within natural variation.

    It’s kind of like a sun-worshiper cutting open a grapefruit and exclaiming: “Wow, it looks like the sun!”

  8. 8
    2up2down2furious

    http://www.haaretz.com/weekend/magazine/does-the-presence-of-the-idf-s-hq-in-tel-aviv-endanger-the-city-s-population.premium-1.435042 Disturbingly, Israel has located IDF headquarters in an increasingly crowded civilian area in Tel Aviv. Why does the IDF use the people of Tel Aviv as human shields? While I’m no fan of Hamas, it’s difficult not to operate in residential areas when you are the government of one of the most densely-packed territories on earth.

  9. 9
    Silentbob

    @ 8 2up2down2furious

    The relevance of your comment to eggplant pareidolia is not immediately obvious.
    Wrong thread?

  10. 10
    Pope Bandar bin Turtle

    I am the eggplant
    Koo-koo-ka-choo

  11. 11
    mordred

    As an adherent of the One True Vegetable church I must disagree. These are not your puny human letters but the secret runes of our vegetable overlords.

    As to the meaning – let’s just say this in one rude eggplant!

  12. 12
    Silentbob

    (The walrus was Paul)

  13. 13
    birgerjohansson

    -You know, this is right out of the film “Blade Runner”. God is an android manufacturer who leaves his logo inside his creations. And we are all (including the fish, the trees and the eggplant) constructs -the sentient ones complete with synthetic memory implants!

    Also: Scientists vs. eggplant:. Creationists choose the arguments of the eggplants.

  14. 14
    birgerjohansson

    ….and if you enlarge the photo, you will find the reflection of God looking over the shoulder (film reference).

  15. 15
    sailor1031

    looks more like a stylized jesus with very big ears to me. i’m going to have to revise some of my beliefs – obviously!

  16. 16
    SuzyW

    I’m growing egg plant in my garden this year….can’t wait to see what mine has spelled out inside!

  17. 17
    Henry Gale

    As a Pastafarian, whose favorite religious meal is eggplant parmesan, this makes me humble hungry.

  18. 18
    Crimson Clupeidae

    So god was sitting around, thinking his ineffable thoughts, wondering what could possibly be the best way to reveal his divine awesomeness to all of creation.

    …and the best he could come up with is this? A poorly formed image of his ‘name’ rendered in a somewhat modern language that only a moderate percentage of people speak. Also, in a rather obscure kitchen in….New Orleans?

    Our standards for divine miracles are really getting lowered.

  19. 19
    TheGrimp

    Two kickstarter dudes just found the image of God in a rock! It’s the eggplant and potato salad kickstarter all rolled into one.

    https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/jbarwood/minerals-or-bust-season-one-episode-one/posts/911548

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