Jun 26 2014

Forget Slender Man

This is far more terrifying, because it’s real.

Invisible agents who artfully flip people’s hair! It’s almost as scary as religion.


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  1. 1

    So who else saw that picture and immediately thought of this?


  2. 2
    UnknownEric the Apostate

    “Excuse me, there’s a ninja behind you… THERE’S A NIN– oh… never mind.”

  3. 3

    That’s probably the most hilariously terrifying thing I’ve ever seen!

  4. 4

    There’s a cinema in London that has cinema ninjas whose job it is to shush noisy patrons by creeping up on them.


    This, I maintain, is a) BRILLIANT! and b) a fucking good way to get a smack in the mouth!


  5. 5

    But there is really a Splenda-man right? He goes around substituting artificial sweeter in sugar packets.

  6. 6

    @ Louis, #4:

    I really hope they don’t try to use this method in the U.S.A. A smack in the mouth might be the least of a cinema ninja’s concerns.

  7. 7
    Crimson Clupeidae

    So, a fan is too expensive?

  8. 8
    David Chapman

    This fucker gets paid to dress as a ninja and play about with womens’ hair?
    I’m green with envy.

  9. 9

    David: It does make me wonder now if its really the wind or if the hair ninjas are just THAT good.

  10. 10

    Oddly, the stereotypical ninja outfit was based on the stagehands of one kind of Japanese theater. They dressed in unobtrusive black, and were considered just part of the background. So kinda like this, but with no camera.

    In some case, one of tbe stagehands up and killed somebody. Whether that was part of the play or a real assassination, I dunno, but it was freaky and impressive.

    In real life, ninjas dressed like other people, to blend in. Camo is tough, and black stands out, but a janitor goes anywhere. (A modern “ninja” took a bet that he could get into a guarded office — he picked up a camera, tagged on to a documentary crew, and was let into the office with the others).

  11. 11

    @10 Menyambal: Kabuki theatre is what you’re thinking of. It’s common in Kabuki for stagehands to be dressed in black and situated against a black background. They weren’t invisible, but it was easy for the audience to get used to ignoring them. Then someone came up with the clever idea for ninja in plays to start off disguised as stagehands. The audience would naturally ignore them until they suddenly entered the scene. Soon enough, the all-black outfit became stereotypical for ninja based off of how they always appeared in Kabuki, despite the fact that it has no bearing in real-life, and is just a trick to work with the medium.

    So the people here are much more like Kabuki stagehands, using their all-green clothing to blend in much like stagehands did with all-black clothing. Now, if one of them suddenly killed a shampoo actress, we’ve got a ninja on our hands.

  12. 12

    So women need help flipping their hair? That’s so “like a girl.”


    (Couldn’t resist…)

  13. 13

    By the way, a bit of dialogue from an old Disney movie just came to mind:

    Boy: “If I kissed you, would you yell for help?”
    Girl: “Would you need help?”

  14. 14
    Ogvorbis: Still failing at being human.

    That is just . . . just . . . just . . .

    I dunno. No words for my reaction.

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