It’s getting awfully gossipy up there in the highest governmental institutions. Boebert and Greene are fighting.

It’s no secret that the relationship between Marjorie Taylor Greene and Lauren Boebert has never been worse. They’ve yelled at each other on and off the floor. Greene recently called Boebert a “little bitch” to her face. And Boebert supported Greene’s removal from the Freedom Caucus.

But, lawmakers told The Daily Beast, the situation between the two is still even worse than most people think.

“A fistfight could break out at any moment,” Rep. Tim Burchett (R-TN) told The Daily Beast.

Can we get some hair-pulling, too? Screeching and clawing with long nails? Is this an episode of Housewives of Washington DC or what?

Another Republican lawmaker who is close to both Greene and Boebert told The Daily Beast that the situation was a tinderbox.

“You can’t have too many of these rifts for too long,” this lawmaker said.

Another GOP member suggested that one of them would destroy the other—they just didn’t know who would come out on top.

“They will be nailing that coffin shut,” this lawmaker said, “and one of them is still in there kicking and screaming!”

Rep. Paul Gosar (R-AZ) compared Greene and Boebert’s battle to that of a “two-way sword.”

“I just think that whatever is there, could be utilized both ways,” he said, adding that “people make decisions that they have to work and live by, and you kind of hate being in their shoes.”

After Greene called Boebert a “little bitch” to her face on the House floor, Greene was summarily booted from the House Freedom Caucus. And while Boebert could have probably helped save Greene from that embarrassment by defending her to the group, she instead chose to agree with fellow Freedom Caucus members, voting for Greene’s dismissal.

The “Freedom” Caucus was already a joke, with some of the worst people in congress gathering together to pressure everyone else to bow to their terrible politics, but this just makes it simultaneously worse and more laughable.

While the HFC was founded on not allowing showier, less serious conservative voices to join its ranks—like Louie Gohmert (R-TX) and Steve King (R-IA)—that thinking has been a thing of the past for years. The Freedom Caucus eventually even let Gohmert join its ranks. (Both members are now gone from Congress.)

By the time Greene and Boebert arrived in Congress just days before the Jan. 6 insurrection, the Freedom Caucus was allowing almost any rambunctious conservative to join. It had, after all, primarily become a pro-Donald Trump group and less of the ideological organization formed to fight for a more open process in Congress.

And now it’s a forum for petty high school drama. I hope this makes it less effective.

Remember when Congress was all about dignity and decorum? Nah, I don’t either.

No thank you. No meaty beer for me.

Larry Kudlow, a Fox Business host and former Trump economic advisor, raged against the idea of “plant-based beer” on his Friday-night show and falsely claimed that President Joe Biden’s climate plan would require Americans to give up meat.

“Get this: America has to stop eating meat, stop eating poultry, fish, seafood, eggs, dairy, and animal-based fats,” Kudlow said. “OK, you got that? No burgers on July 4. No steaks on the barbie. I’m sure middle America is just going to love that. Can you grill those Brussels sprouts?

“So get ready: You can throw back a plant-based beer with your grilled Brussels sprouts and wave your American flag. Call it July 4 green,” Kudlow said.

“Now, I’m making fun of this because I intend to make fun of it. This kind of thinking is stupid,” he added. “It comes from a bunch of ideological zealots who don’t care one whit about America’s well-being. Not one whit.”

None of his claims are true.

Yes, you can grill Brussels sprouts. They’re quite good.

The big news for him is that all beer is plant- (and fungi-) based. A meat-based beer sounds remarkably unpleasant. If Larry and Kid Rock want to try it, though, I wouldn’t stop them.

Larry Kudlow is a lying moron…a typical Republican, I guess. He said this two years ago — has anyone seen any hint of a steak ban?

Putin is, apparently, a student of history who has learned one lesson: “Russia will be saved not by pity but by cruelty.” I wouldn’t want to be in Yevgeny Prigozhin’s shoes right now, because Putin is probably planning to go all Peter the Great on him.

Russian leaders have always fashioned themselves as hideously cruel demi-gods, none more so than Putin’s hero Tsar Peter the Great, who went mano-a-mano with his own Prigozhin and an ersatz 17th century Wagner Group known as the Streltsy, a cadre of some 50,000 powerful soldier-tradesmen skilled in murder, embezzlement, and racketeering.

Although the Streltsy were sworn to protect the government, all the legitimized raping and pillaging made it difficult for them to decide who was in charge. Historian Robert Massie described them as “a kind of collective dumb animal, never quite sure who was its proper master, but ready to rush and bite anyone who challenged its own privileged position.”

And like Wagner Group’s 25,000-50,000 Kremlin-sponsored mercenary soldiers, the Streltsy, whose chief concern was also making money, made the doomed move to knock off their boss. Peter tortured thousands of them and their wives and children to death, with the Streltsy’s Prigozhin, Major Karpakov, strapped to a spit and twirled over a fire.

Peter sent his personal physician Dr. Carbonari to ensure Karpakov was slow-roasted. Let my notes from the historians in Russia’s state archive describe what happened next: “Karpakov was removed from the spit to rest before going back on the fire…Carbonari accidentally left his knife in the cell…Karparkov could no longer take the torture…Used the knife to slit his throat…But he was too weak and failed…Carbonari discovered him and he was returned to torture.”

But Putin allowed Prigozhin and the Wagner Group to peacefully retire to Belarus, you might say. I suspect that one reason for that is that it will give Putin an excuse to annex Belarus next. If his army can survive Ukraine, that is.

Elon Musk thinks voting rights out to be tied to parenthood. You will pump out offspring, or risk losing your citizenship.

Fantastic fascist dystopia he wants to build here.

Also, what procreation problem? There’s only a problem if you have a prior belief that procreation is necessary to be a worthy human being.

I’m sorry (not sorry). Minnesota’s new progressive surge might actually hurt universities in regressive states. We just passed some significant laws to help Minnesota students.

Minnesota this year passed the North Star Promise scholarship program, which will pay college tuition and fees for in-state residents whose families earn $80,000 a year or less. The program, set to launch in the fall of 2024, is projected to cost $117 million and would help about 15,000 to 20,000 students, according to the state’s office of higher education.

Wow, I wish we’d had that when my kids were going to college — I would have qualified, and it would have been a big help. Better late then never, though, and I’m happy to see a new generation benefit. The state to our West is not happy about it, though.

Minnesota’s ambitious plan to give lower-income residents free college has created a “crisis” in neighboring North Dakota, where higher education officials worry about a drop in enrollment from Minnesota students who can get a better deal at home.

North Dakota college leaders spoke at a meeting this week of the State Board of Higher Education, whose members brainstormed ways to prevent a flood of Minnesota students leaving North Dakota schools.

“This has catastrophic implications. This is a very serious situation for us,” David Cook, president of North Dakota State University, said at the meeting.

But why should North Dakota care about a benefit given to Minnesota residents? I was surprised to learn this:

More than half of North Dakota State University’s incoming class, and 45% of its undergraduate student body, consists of students from Minnesota, according to estimates presented at the meeting. Minnesota natives make up 24% undergraduates at North Dakota State College of Science, and 28% at the University of North Dakota.

NDSU and UND are both right on the state border — you can live in Minnesota and easily commute to either of those schools. There’s nothing wrong with those universities, and I can see how they might panic at the thought of a quarter to half their students suddenly transferring out. We’re all suffering with the effects of the pandemic, I sympathize with any university taking an additional hit.

It’s easily fixed, though. Just pass some progressive legislation in your legislature, Dakotans, and give students free tuition and spend money to improve your schools. Oh, your legislature is packed with Republicans, and your governor is a Trumpian entrepreneur who seems to be distracted by a futile attempt at a presidential run?

I am so sorry! Sincerely. You are so screwed.

The unfortunate residents of Virginia have been denied access to Pornhub. They might not notice in a state named after a Virgin Queen that is just maintaining their puritanical tradition.

The President Pro tempore of the Senate of Virginia, State Sen. L. Louise Lucas (D-Portsmouth), called out Republican Virginia Gov. Glenn Youngkin after an age-verification law lead to Pornhub blocking access for everyone in the state.

The law requires pornography websites operating in the state to work more aggressively to find out whether a visitor is 18 or older to gain access to the site. One of the approved methods of verification includes requiring users to upload copies government-issued identification.

Brilliant scheme that I’m sure will be effective in preventing under-age kids from witnessing perversions.

Even easier: grab Dad’s wallet while he’s taking a shower. You can also get his credit card while you’re at it.

The rich really are different.

Have you ever felt like you spend all your time explaining the obvious to idiots who are going to reflexively reject the evidence anyway? That’s the discouraging thing about battling creationism, you’re fighting willful ignorance. Even more significant is the need to explain the importance of vaccines when we’ve got mush-brained cranks like RFK Jr. geysering nonsense into the discourse that the media treats gently as if he has something intelligent to say.

This has always been a problem, though. Today I learned that Minnesota had mandatory vaccination laws for school children in 1883 (Yay! Woo-hoo! You go, Minnesota!) but that they repealed it in 1903 (booooo) after…a debate.

Fucking debates. Anyway, they dragged Justus Ohage, a real physician and the public health commissioner for St Paul into a debate with a carpet-bagger from Indiana, WB Clarke, who proceeded to glibly gish-gallup all over the place.

Dr. Clarke spoke next for an hour. He called Edward Jenner’s research “bogus.” He threw out incorrect and cherry-picked examples. He claimed that Germany had compulsory vaccination but also had the worst smallpox outbreak in Europe in 1871…
He did not mention that the smallpox epidemic was caused by unvaccinated French troops in Germany fighting in the Franco-Prussian War and that the vaccinated Germans suffered far less than the French.
There was no way for anyone to rebut these claims as he was making them, and Clarke was a smooth talker. He spoke quickly and vividly ultimately comparing the “vaccinator’s lancet” to a “highwayman’s butcher knife” saying that people had a right to defend themselves against each.
When Dr. Ohage took the stage, he only had 15 minutes. He said he did not have time to offer a rebuttal of each of Clarke’s claims. Instead, he had to defend “the attitude he had taken” against the anti-vaccinationists. The damage was done.

The result: the Minnesota legislature repealed the mandatory vaccination law in 1903.

Wait, no, that was only the proximate result. The long-term consequence was that Minnesota was ravaged by a smallpox epidemic in 1924-25 that killed 500 people. Oops.

State law blocked a sound public health response. An 1883 state law had required all school-age children to be vaccinated against smallpox. But in 1903, the legislature repealed that law and made compulsory child vaccination illegal. Although smallpox vaccination is almost 100 percent effective, public health officers had no power to make people protect themselves. They could recommend, but not mandate, the vaccine.

Starting in November 1924, both cities launched free vaccination campaigns. Once the deaths mounted, the frightened public jammed the vaccination centers. As reported in the Minneapolis Journal, as many as 17,000 got their skin scratches in a single day. By mid-December 1924—according to public health officials—some 210,000 people in St. Paul and 350,000 in Minneapolis had been vaccinated.

Clarke was never called to account for all the people he was responsible for killing. The sheep of Minnesota were cheerfully duped by a smooth-talking liar, and stampeded into the vaccination clinics to save themselves from their own stupidity.

It’s 1902 in the United States all over again. I’ll make the bold prediction that in 20 years or less we’re going to have to pay the piper.