The kitchen spider says, “Good morning!” » « Weird little warmonger & Trump bootlicker dies, suddenly

Do not taunt the bison

This old man did not taunt the bison at all, and was respectful and cautious, but that didn’t help him. Wild animals are scary; we’ve been to Yellowstone, and were extremely careful to avoid the beasts.

Yikes. That guy was spinning through the air; he survived, but apparently suffered some serious injuries.

Yellowstone officials warns on the park’s website that the animals in the park “are wild and dangerous, no matter how docile they may appear to be” – and the best way to view them is from inside a car.

Officials advise visitors to stay at least 100 yards (90 meters) away from bears, wolves and cougars – and a minimum of 25 yards away from all other animals, including bison and elk.

Here in Minnesota we’d add moose to that list.

The kitchen spider says, “Good morning!” » « Weird little warmonger & Trump bootlicker dies, suddenly

Comments

  2. John Morales says

    https://www.linkedin.com/pulse/buffalo-vision-blaine-knott
    Buffalo Vision
    Published Jul 8, 2020

    The buffalo hunt meant a lot of different things to the Indigenous populations of North America. It meant food and clothing, tools and utensils, and most of all a spirit being that blessed these populations with everything they needed to survive. Indigenous hunters harvested buffalo herds in a number of ways. They used stealth or subterfuge, by cloaking themselves in wolf skins or mimicking the cries of a bison calf, to get within bow and arrow range, or coordinating a funneling of a smaller herd towards a cliff (buffalo jump) or a corral, which contributed to a larger kill. The buffalo that plummeted over the cliff were either killed in the fall or butchered immediately where they lay. Understandably, a major part of Indigenous life on the Plains was oriented around the movement of the buffalo herds. The buffalo’s habits and kinds were studied intensely, and virtually every part of the beast was put to some utilitarian use. And the reverence for the buffalo, related him directly to the Great Mystery or Creator.

  3. dennyk says

    Not sure why they left moose off the list. Wyoming has plenty and they are also very dangerous.

  4. Rob Grigjanis says

    When I was living in Edmonton, I did a bike trip with some friends to, and through, Elk Island National Park. Biking through the park, came across a bison having a lie-down in the road. Some of my friends, being bolder than me, just biked past it, within a couple metres. I decided to wait until a car came by, and rode by with the car between me and the beast (they are fucking huge). The better part of valour, etc.

  6. Big Boppa says

    I once saw a woman try to sit her 2 to 3 year old kid on the back of a bison at Yellowstone. Luckily for them, the bison ambled off slowly and she never got close enough. A nearby ranger caught up to her though and I don’t think the experience ended on a high note.

  7. beholder says

    At least, if you do taunt the bison, have a getaway plan ready.

    I try to keep a grand prismatic spring between myself and any highly kinetic beef stew ingredients.

  9. Rob Grigjanis says

    Kathi Rick @5:

    yeah, i know, there’s something wrong with me

    Well, at least it’s good that you know that.

  10. larpar says

    Way back when, my family was on vacation and we went to a drive through wild life park. I think it was in Missouri. My youngest brother, probably 5 or 6 at the time, was in the far back of the station wagon taking a nap. He woke up to a giant bison head staring in the back side window. Scared him to death. 50 years later and I think he still has nightmares.

  12. birgerjohansson says

    On north Sweden male moose can get enormous. This is why the ‘crash cage’ around the passengers are so seemingly over-engineered on Volvo cars.

    On youtube there is a vblogger that posts videos of his cattle, especially of this enormous bull named Rufus. Rufus is not mean, but just like other bulls he is programmed to approach anything not a cow and either push at it or charge it. The farmer is careful to either stay in the truck or keep something between himself and Rufus.
    That bull literally weighs more than a ton.
    And that is a nominally domesticated animal.

  15. CompulsoryAccount7746, Sky Captain says

    Do not pet the fluffy cows.
    Hm, lifted by one’s hindquarters into an uncontrolled tumble from a height.
    *Falls down YouTube rabbit hole of tuck / roll techniques.*

    Surprisingly my search yielded no tutorials from rodeo clowns.

  17. FossilFishy (NOBODY, and proud of it!) says

    Rob Grigjanis, back in the before times, paper map, no mobile, I camped at Elk Island. I arrived hot and tired after towing my camp gear a bit over 100k. I was a bit disappointed when the nice staff at the info centre told me the campground was a further 15k in.

    As I turned to leave they asked “Are you riding a bike?” Now normally when I’m asked that while wearing a salt stained shirt, fingerless gloves and bike shorts I respond with “Nah, I just wear this to look good.” But their tone wasn’t casual. My “yup” triggered a warning that the bison like to chase cyclists. That it was suspected that the smooth quick gait of a cyclist reads as predator to them.

    Great.

    So off I go, the reassurance that no one had ever been caught not really helping. As the sun sank and the shadows stretched across the road I tried to peer as far ahead as I could. Wondering the whole while if I still had the legs to outrun a murderous plains monster should the need arise.

    And suddenly something black and huge exploded out of the ditch beside me. I went from tired dawdling at maybe 12km/h to 30 something in what felt like three pedal strokes. I don’t remember running up the gears as I, for the first time in my life, used the adrenaline dump’s flight reaction for its intended purpose.

    I looked back to see a moose, who’d apparently been having a little rest in the ditch, running away from me.

    Fuck me.

    I road the rest of the way on the centre line and saw nothing else so I didn’t have to find out if I had two panic sprints in me.

  18. CompulsoryAccount7746, Sky Captain says

    The falling specifically interested me. Methods are very context dependent.

    [A stunt rider] – How to fall off a horse

    most common injuries when falling off a horse [are broken] collar bone, wrist [from thrusting arms out]. […] Give ourselves a hug up on our shoulders [to] save your arms. […] You can choose forward or backwards […] I’m gonna [recline to horizontal] throw my leg over the horse’s neck and roll away [to escape the horse while not having to see its feet in the process, then make] as much of a cylinder or ball as possible. Cylinder’s better because your knees don’t stick out and you roll a bit better. But if you’ve got horses after you in the Grand National, you want to get in a ball because obviously you don’t [their] legs and feet and everything over you.

    US Parachute Association – Parachute Landing Fall: [Hit the ground vertically with fists below crotch, legs together on balls of feet. Absorb impact on bent knees. Tip to the side onto a calf, then thigh, butt, back. Kick legs up to an L and roll]
    Or staying on a side with butt off the ground: from thigh, to hip, to shoulder, then roll across upper torso to the other shoulder. Wikipedia has chin down—arms curled up over face or hands linked behind neck—elbows tucked either way.

    Hip/opposite-shoulder rolls get used in parkour and martial arts for near-ground scenarios with horizontal momentum.

  19. unclefrogy says

    I started watching a YouTube channel called cross timbers bison (https://www.youtube.com/@CrossTimbersBison/videos)
    a while ago and am impressed with how athletic Bison are and the caution Dusty takes with them and around these essentially wild undomesticated animals.
    I ain’t approaching just any wild animal or domestic animal for that matter with out do care especially without much experience with them particularly

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