I get email (Phillip edition)

If you experience difficulties typing exclamation points in a comment here, it’s because Phillip Jones has been hogging them all. I just discovered a vast stagnant pool of missives from him deep in the bowels of my university email account, which has a lot of filters on it to prioritize messages from students and colleagues, so email from outside those groups tend to languish in neglect there. He seems to go on a rage jag every few weeks and dump a lot of repetitive invective, with numerous exclamation points, typically including links to his own posts on Twitter or Facebook, as if they are authoritative sources.

But lately he’s raging on Gettr, the right-wing pro-Trump Twitter look-alike, because his Twitter account has been suspended. Poor man. At least his emails are getting shorter.

https://gettr.com/post/p1a8bdj013f https://gettr.com/post/p1a8cis02f9 I’m going to contact the police and ask them to arrest you! And I’m going to contact UNMM and ask the to fire you!

Now I want to ask my local police if they’ve been contacted by a very emphatic kook — that was sent last night, so if the cops knock on my door and drag me away in handcuffs today, you’ll know why.

He’s going to have a tough time contacting my employer at UNMM, though. I don’t even know what that is!


  1. Akira MacKenzie says

    For someone who screams about “freedom,” Phil seems obsessed with losing the cop on those he disagrees with.

  2. says

    I rarely use exclamation points in my writing like that, so my prose won’t suffer from a shortage.
    My concern would be how to indicate factorials if we run out.

  3. bcw bcw says

    Doesn’t he know he has to use the online app for scheduling the arrests of people he doesn’t like?

  4. Akira MacKenzie says

    Damnit, I just realized that should be “loosing the cops.”

    Ugh. I hate being stupid.

  5. blf says

    Akira MacKenzie@7, Um, you previously offended Typos at @2.

    Typos is teh Magic Sky Faerie of typos. A typo is an offering to Typos. So “offending Typos” is correcting a typo, i.e., withdrawing an offering. Typos was brought to our attention (i.e., invented) by a commentator here at FtB I haven’t seen in a long time, whose handles (they had more than one) I do not now recall (sorry!), but who were a States National Park Ranger at a site involving lots(?) of steam trains. They were also involved in wildfire fighting, not “on the line” as I recall, but with logistics / support and similar.

  6. blf says

    Arrest you for what?

    Take yer pick: Existing, denying cretinism, allowing them to horde exclam points (!), breathing, liking spiders, having blog commentators, blocking absurd e-mails, cheese, having a Tophy Wife, and an aching back.

  7. Reginald Selkirk says

    That person needs some variety. I recommend interrobang‽ It’s enigmatic.

  8. René says

    @11, blf. Arrest you for what?

    Arrest him for not correcting his then-friend Dick Dawkins for taking my Guinness, ordered a minute or so before they joined me at the bar in Dublin, at the conference that led to “dear moslima”.

  9. blf says

    René@16, “Arrest him for […] taking my Guinness […] at the bar in Dublin”.

    An “arrestable” offense, albeit as a (former) resident of Dublin, such gaffes are often settled by both parties buying both parties several pints… and have forgetting all about it by the next morning (amazingly in their own beds).

  10. says

    UNMM? I suspect it stands for “University of New Mexico, Morris.” Perhaps this errant campus was established when someone took a left turn at Albuquerque. Look around to see if it’s hiding behind UMM.

  11. lumipuna says

    But lately he’s raging on Gettr, the right-wing pro-Trump Twitter look-alike, because his Twitter account has been suspended. Poor man. At least his emails are getting shorter.

    I hereby propose the development of a niche social media platform named Shortr, which uses AI to automatically summarize long screeds into tweet-length posts. The end result will be often a largely agrammatical salad of buzzwords, which is sufficient depth of communication for the target demographic.

  12. willj says

    Everyone should be arrested, now and then. Builds character. The cops aren’t that bad and you’ll meet some interesting people who you can write about. Maybe not biology professors, but…who knows?

  13. Pierce R. Butler says

    At least his emails are getting shorter.

    Which counts as evidence against the hypothesis of Phillip J having a close relationship to Alex J.

    But the obsessiveness, belligerence, and failures-of-factuality leave that as a strong possibility.

  14. Oggie: Mathom says


    Typos is teh Magic Sky Faerie of typos. A typo is an offering to Typos. So “offending Typos” is correcting a typo, i.e., withdrawing an offering. Typos was brought to our attention (i.e., invented) by a commentator here at FtB I haven’t seen in a long time, whose handles (they had more than one) I do not now recall (sorry!), but who were a States National Park Ranger at a site involving lots(?) of steam trains. They were also involved in wildfire fighting, not “on the line” as I recall, but with logistics / support and similar.

    Tpyos is not a Magic Sky Faerie. Tpyos is the Lord of typographical errors. He, may He be blsesed, is supported by His minionions Grammatica, Borkquotia, and some others I forget.

    I am still around. Not commenting much. I dislocated my neck, had to get the vertebrae fused, and ended up taking a disability retirement from the USNPS. Between the Army Knee ™, the arthritis caused by limping on the Army knee, my broken back from falling off the cliff, and then my dislocated neck (with associated atrophy and nerve damage (with full orchestration (and four part harmony))), I just had to stop doing the greatest job in the world.

  15. Oggie: Mathom says

    And I stopped using my full nym O g v o r b i s because, for a long time, every time it was used, I got an email telling me to kill myself.

    And the other accolytes of Tpyos include, but are not limited to Das Kapital, Punctuatio, and others.

  16. mandrake says

    My solution is as follows:
    exclamation points: $10.00 each (after midnight and before 6am, $8.00 each)
    capital letters: $12.00 each (capitol letters, never)
    question marks: FREE!
    verbs: …well you get the point

  17. JimB says

    Might not have to do anything. Could be self correcting.
    Looks like m already told him they were tired of his bullshit and quit…

  18. birgerjohansson says

    If he shows up in Morris just administer a tranquiliser with a dart gun. Don’t let him bite you with that foaming mouth.

  19. wzrd1 says

    Whatever you do, don’t say his name three times.
    And in closing…
    I’ve got a pallet of exclamation points, largely due to ordering that excess and rarely utilizing them.

  20. StevoR says

    @ ^ wzrd1 : or do you? That question mark at the end has me wondering.. ;-)

  21. StevoR says

    @ Reginald Selkirk : I thought the interrobang was the combined question mark and excaimation mark pairing no!?

  22. John Morales says

    Heh. The interrobang never really took off, cute though it may be.

    For me, the most damning thing about this post is that PZ couldn’t be fucked to waste the time in setting up a specific message massaging (heh, sorry, can’t help it) rule to just dump these missives into the bit-bucket.

    (To be blunt, PZ’s regular vermin filters suffice. No point doing more)

  23. blf says

    René@19, That made me realise I haven’t been to Amsterdam since… well, not at all in this entire millennium. Which is rather weird, as Amsterdam was a favourite destination when I was lived in Ireland and teh “U”K. Definitely need to revisit! The bank account can support a visit, wonders if I have the energy, etc., to now-ish make bookings, etc., or should put it off until after the summer tourist season… And yes, there certain are pubs in Amsterdam! Along with great museums, pleasing walks, wonderful people, canals, cheese, cheese, canals, and pubs.

  24. trex30 says

    I’m not a kook, PZ, you are, claiming that the atheist movement is full of people who think rape, racism, and anti-LGBTIA+ bigotry is okay, which as Michael Nugent said is delusional! You said “we (now) have an atheism where it is acceptable to rail against feminism, because feminists should be raped and killed.” nonsense!

    Everything I’ve said is backed by undeniable proof, and my Twitter, GETTR, and Facebook posts contain authoritative sources, like JSTOR.org! Why haven’t you deleted your Facebook and Twitter accounts if you don’t like them, and better yet, why have you ignore them not banning antisemites but banning conservatives like me?!

    Thanks for demonstrating once again the intellectual vacuity of radical leftists PZ! You didn’t acknowledge or rebut the actual content of my emails or posts, just talked a bunch shit out of your mouth! I brought up you ignoring Joy Reid’s antisemitism, 9/11 trutherism, “you’re not really black” racism against Tim Scott, not letting Chris Rufo speak, and demonizing all white Americans as evil. I brought up CRT pioneer Derrick Bell’s black-on-black crime apologetics, Jew-hatred, and antiwhite racism! I brought up you ignoring white supremacy and misogyny on the left by people like John Pilger and socialist slavery apologist George Fitzhugh! I brought up that you were a racist and misogynist yourself, calling Michael Nugent the Irish wanker, and making rape jokes! The video can be found on YouTube! I also brought up that Edgar Rice Burroughs mocked the white man’s burden by Rudyard Kipling, and portrayed colored martians as superior to white martians, and portrayed the waziri tribe as intelligent and noble. His views on race weren’t as simplistic as you make them seem. You blocked me on Twitter PZ because you couldn’t rebut my criticism of you and knew I was right about your egregious hypocrisy! Coward! UNMM is University of Minnesota Morris el stupido! I’ve started a change.org petition against you, and asked the Minnesota Republicans to defund and boycott your college! Here are my responses to your deranged acolytes!

    I don’t rant Christoph! Everything I write about in that post and all others is back up by evidence! I justify my hatred of PZ Myers with facts, figures, and logic! What did I wrote that was untrue!

    I started a change.org petition against him Nemo! You’ve got no way of refuting or even grasping my actual arguments troglodyte!

    feralboy12 You rarely address the content of what people write either troll! It’s easier to lob smears and snark lie a schoolyard bully!

    bcw bcw I want PZ Arrested because he told blacks to kill cops, not because I don’t like him! Incitement to murder is a crime dummy!

    Akira Mackenzie you misspelled loosing as losing twice! You are stupid and I hate idiots like you too! Calling for a revolution to erase the stain of America is not disagreement, it is treason you commie rat! How can you criticize me when you can’t even use proper grammar?!

    blf, you’re just like Trump, you talk and say absolutley nothing!

    wajim that you find Joy Reid’s antiwhite racism, 9/11 conspiracism, lies, demonization of all cops and republicans,and antisemitism funny says a lot about you Skunkwipe!

    Raging Bee that you see nothing wrong with PZ Myers calling for a revolution to destroy America and for blacks like myself to take up arms against police officers says a lot about you scumbag!

    blf The only Cretin is you and your lord and master PZ Myers! He should be arrested for calling for the overthrow of the American government which is treason,amnd encouraging black people to get guns and shoot cops! My emails are not absurd! I back up everything I said about PZ Myers! Myers claims, like that Nugent was defending rapists, or that atheist movement is full of racists, homophobes,and rapists, or Ali was happily exploiting atrocities, are absurd!

    Reginald Selkirk, you and your butt buddy Crip Dyke, Right Reverend Feminist FuckToy of Death & Her Handmaiden
    need to grow brains, and realize that snark and sarcasm are not scientific, logical rebuttals nor a sign of being smart!
    That you attack me for misspelling leftists but ignore PZ Myers’s rape jokes shows you both to be unethical bottom feeders!

    Rene that you hate Dawkins for the dear muslima letter, but not Myers for calling Nugent the Irish wanker and accusing him of defending rapists, not to mention Robin Williams a wealthy white man distracting from George Floyd makes you a goddamned hypocrite!

    Thanks for demonstrating that you are a master of white noise!

    Rene fuck you and your troll friend blf!

    whyhedt Typos are excusable, advocating violence and vandalism like PZ did with the Morris North Star and Andy NGO is not! You’re a moral degenerate!

    anthonybarcellos it’s spell UMN, you’re as wrong as I was punk!

    Brony, Social Justice Cenobite slings mud at people and doesn’t acknowledge or rebut their actual points! Troglodyte

    lumipuna I I hereby propose that yiu go back to school and learn that snark and smears don’t prove your position or rebut that of your opponent! I don’t write screeds! The anger and emotion in my posts is justified, unlike yours and PZ’s, and I demonstrate it with evidence and sound reasoning unlike you and your cult leader!

    if you think not all cops are bad, then why are you supporting PZ Myers who called them all a mob of bullying cowards! PZ is not just a biology professor, he supports terrorist antifa! And wants a revolution to erase America!

    Pierce R. Butler, I’m a black man you racist presumed, and I hate Alex Jones who exploits tragedies like Sandy hook and harasser families! Provide evidence that I engage in obsessiveness, belligerence, and failures-of-factuality, or STFU Brownshirt!

    Oggie Mathom: Thanks for demonstrating your sapience deficiency with your taunts!

    Mandrake you have no solutions, because you have no rationality, as your mockery towards me proves!

    JimB the only one full of shit is you! Yi7 haven’t addressed any of the actual content in my posts, instead resorting to throwing stones like an oafish schoolyard bully! Your lord and savior PZ Myers isn’t tired, or he wouldn’t be posting about me!

    birgerjohansson you need to be arrested too, for threatening violence against me! PZ is the one whose rabid, calling for blacks like me to kill cops!why do you ignore him hypocrite!

    WZRD1 you have nothing useful or intelligent to contribute to the world! Fuck off!

    No he doesn’t StevoR and neither do you insult spewer!

    John Morales the only vermin is you and your cult leader PZ! I don’t write missives, I write scathing criticisms! The latter, unlike the former, is backed up by proof, which you and PZ are incapable of producing! Thanks for telling him to censor me and demonstrating that he and you are cowards who can’t address much less rebut your opposition’s arguments! At least I’d not call for and support violence like PZ does!

    blf blah blah blah, that’s all you have loser!

    #NotAllLeftists have minds that are intellectual deserts like yours, or sling mud like Nazi brown shirts!

    Alt-X Damn! you’re the definition of a babbling monkey! Constantly Chattering but saying nothing of value! You’re also like McCarthy, make evidence-free accusations against people!

  25. says

    I let the above post through for the amusement of his claim, I don’t rant on an extremely ranty comment.

    He’s been blocked, he won’t be back.

  26. John Morales says

    Well, PZ was not exaggerating. Quite remarkable.
    Here is the comment, suitably filtered by sentence terminators.

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