Now that’s stolen valor


Another election fraud case by Sydney Powell and Lin Wood is going down in flames as a Michigan judge finds their affidavits of voting shenanigans in Detroit were not responsibly vetted. “There’s a duty that counsel has that when you’re submitting a sworn statement … that you have reviewed it, that you had done some minimal due diligence,” she said. They had not.

Going through the list of rejected claims, one jumped out at me.

One declaration came from a witness referred to by the lawyers in court documents only as “Spider.” In his sworn declaration, he claimed to be a former military intelligence expert who had discovered server traffic revealing that Iran and China had tampered with the election. But The Washington Post revealed in December that “Spider” was actually a 43-year-old Texas-based information technology consultant named Joshua Merritt who never worked in military intelligence.

Records show he enrolled in a training program with a military intelligence battalion but never completed the entry-level course, an Army spokeswoman told The Post. Records show that Merritt spent most of his decade in the U.S. Army as a wheeled-vehicle mechanic.

How dare he steal the honorable name of “Spider”! Can he be arrested for that?

I suspect that the more serious accusation is that he lied about his credentials and expertise. Being a “wheeled-vehicle mechanic” is an honorable job that does require considerable skill and knowledge — my father was a mechanic, too — but it probably doesn’t prepare you in military intelligence or cybersecurity, and doesn’t involve any training in cracking the information communications going on in Iran and China.

This kind of thing is all Powell and Wood have — people swearing that they saw a mysterious bag that could have held ballots, that sort of thing, and the lawyers didn’t carry out even a superficial scrutiny of the claims.

If Parker decides to discipline the lawyers, she could require them to pay the fees of their opponents in the case, the city of Detroit and Michigan state officials. But she could also go further — assessing additional monetary penalties or recommending grievance proceedings be opened that could result in banning the attorneys from practicing in Michigan or disbarring them altogether.

Yes, please.


By the way, you may have heard that one of the lawyers was weeping, and later resigned from the Wood/Powell team. This wasn’t because she was humiliated in court. She later said she wasn’t crying, she was just furious because no one was defending her hero Donald Trump as he deserved.

Comments

  1. gijoel says

    Did they find ‘Spider’ in an ad in the back of a Solider of Fortune magazine?

  2. elly says

    My son is currently an AIT student at Fort Huachuca, AZ. We’ve discussed this “Spyder/Spider” character on a couple of different occasions, since the latter was – at one point – with the 305th (one of the MI training battalions within the 111th MI Brigade). In addition to the inflated claims of expertise made by “Spider” and the “Kraken” attorneys, apparently a range of conspiracy theorists believe that the 305th itself has confirmed the election was stolen (according to the WaPo, they believe the 305th discovered the vote was manipulated by China and Iran).

    Suffice it to say, my son finds this to be darkly hilarious.

  3. blf says

    @4, Heh, I hadn’t heard that nonsense. Some admittedly very quick searching found this, Anybody seen Gina Haspel? Long post-election stirs an appetite for alternative facts (December 2020 (before the insurrection), emphasis in the original):

    Unless you’re among the select few who really know what’s going on, you may never have heard of the 305th Military Intelligence Battalion, or Executive Order 13848, or Scytl.

    You may not know that CIA Director Gina Haspel was killed last month in a US Special Forces raid in Frankfurt, Germany, which retrieved a server used to control the Dominion voting machines in the US presidential election. Or maybe she was just wounded. Or arrested, and singing like a bird about the global conspiracy to throw the election.

    […]

    There really is an Executive Order 13848, but it doesn’t give Trump nearly the reach some have speculated he has. There’s a 305th Military Intelligence Battalion, but it’s a training unit based in Arizona. There’s a Spanish voting machine company called Scytl, but it has no presence in Frankfurt, where that fateful raid is supposed to have taken place. Gina Haspel, according to the CIA, is still on the job.

    All the intricate puzzle pieces that were supposed to combine for a stunning turnaround haven’t fitted together. As the world moves on, the details that meant so much at the moment will fade, fairly quickly. But we don’t know yet what the people who have believed so fervently in this hidden knowledge are going to do.

    […]

    I’ve found the (competing?) “flipping votes from hair furor to Biden using teh Jewish Space Lasers controlled from Italy” conspiracy lunacy to be quite entertaining. (That actual lunacy asserts military satellites rather than Jewish Space Lasers were used, but it’s more fun to assert the Jewish Space Lasers did it too!)

  4. says

    “If Parker decides to discipline the lawyers, she could require them to pay the fees of their opponents in the case”
    100% this should happen. These endless recounts and lawsuits and other shenanigans are a money pit and so far that pit is being filled with taxpayer money. Enough is enough. Biden won the election fair and square.

  5. raven says

    In his sworn declaration, he claimed to be a former military intelligence expert who had discovered server traffic revealing that Iran and China had tampered with the election.

    And, where is the proof for that Iranian and Chinese internet traffic?
    Without documentation and evidence, it is simply a claim made by a random internet troll.

    And there isn’t any such proof because if there was, they would have included it with their court filing.
    He also almost certainly doesn’t have the access to even monitor such server traffic.

  6. slithey tove (twas brillig (stevem)) says

    That whole set of lawsuits dismissed by the Michigan Justice was a whole clusterfuck of nonsense assertions. EG one
    affidavit was [swearing they saw some random person holding an unmarked bag, they were ‘pretty sure’ were ballots stolen from the polls.] This was presented as hard evidence of fraud.
    I like the Michigan judge reading it and responding,
    “WTF are you including this nonsense in a legal proceeding? (are you really lawyers)
    “Get them disbarred”

  7. slithey tove (twas brillig (stevem)) says

    funny how all the lawyers that signed these allegations are now backing out saying they signed them, didn’t draft them so they can’t be held responsible, and the people who drafted the papers are saying they only drafted them, didn’t sign them so they can’t be held accountable.
    how ironic that lawyers usually tell their clients to read carefully every word, before signing anything, as signatures are ironclad proof of agreement to everything in the document with no means of escape.

  8. gddiver says

    blf “ I’ve found the (competing?) “flipping votes from hair furor to Biden using teh Jewish Space Lasers controlled from Italy” conspiracy lunacy to be quite entertaining. (That actual lunacy asserts military satellites rather than Jewish Space Lasers were used, but it’s more fun to assert the Jewish Space Lasers did it too!)”

    I got a good laugh just imagining what Mel Brooks could have done with this.

  9. elly says

    @5: the WaPo article I was referring to is here: https://www.washingtonpost.com/investigations/sidney-powell-spider-spyder-witness/2020/12/11/0cd567e6-3b2a-11eb-98c4-25dc9f4987e8_story.html

    “The 305th Military Intelligence Battalion at Fort Huachuca has taken on a special significance among supporters of Powell’s lawsuits. Some popular conspiracy theories contend that the unit — rather than Merritt, a former member who was discharged years ago — has determined that China and Iran manipulated the U.S. vote. In late November, Thomas McInerney, a retired lieutenant general in the Air Force and a proponent of election fraud claims, said that President Trump and Powell have ‘got the 305th Military Intelligence Battalion working with them’ and that ‘the Kraken is the 305th Military Intelligence Battalion.’”

    Knowing what I know about the goings on within the student ranks at Fort Huachuca, this is… pretty far out there.

  10. says

    Has Trump during his tenure as president and after ever managed to hire somebody competent who stuck with him? Because it sure doesn’t look like it from a distance.

    Then again, it’s not like the Trump administration has covered itself in glory.
    So it would be understandable for competent people to want to avoid that particular dumpster fire.

  11. dstatton says

    I remember fondly the ditzy blonde who said that they have to believe her because she signed a affidavit and could go to jail if were’t true.

  12. sc_262299b298126f9a3cc21fb87cce79da says

    All of the GQP cases seem to be variations on “we can prove that many people believe fraud occurred.”

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