We don’t have one of those affectionate, cuddly kitties. Instead, we have a hair-trigger psychopath kitty who will cut you if you cross her. You can tell she wants to be friends — she will, for instance, follow me around the house and sit near me, within arms reach but no closer — but if you try to be too chummy, the fangs will come out and she’ll stalk away in a huff.
But last night she jumped up in my lap and lay there purring. I was taken aback. What had I done differently? Then I realized that I was wearing a dark robe, blue but so dark it was nearly black, and everything clicked into place. We’ve known for some time that if we put a black blanket on the floor or on the couch, she would preferentially curl up on that. She just doesn’t like light colored objects. So now I realize…
Our cat is racist.
Either that, or she’s seriously into the Goth scene.
I may have to test her musical preferences. Siouxsie and the Banshees, maybe? Joy Division? Or maybe she’d be content if I just played more Prince?
You should try Bauhaus, Sisters of Mercy or Concrete Blonde. Those are the favorite of my old cat Orpheus. I suspect it was the deep voice of all the singers (he especially loved Concrete Blonde and wanted me to dance around with him when her voice came on).
Try some Bauhaus.
Cats are nature’s Hipsters.
The Doc wrote .
“We don’t have one of those affectionate, cuddly kitties. Instead, we have a hair-trigger psychopath kitty who will cut you if you cross her”
All cats are like that , psyo/angel .
You could try playing her some” Cradle of Filth “
Depends on the favored style of your goth cat. She could be more into synth-pop (Mesh, Lyronian, Aryia, Assemblage 23, Chvrches) or Industrial (Front 242, Skinny Puppy, Einstürzende Neubauten, Die Krupps, Youth Code). Start with some Throbbing Gristle, go from there :P
You’re cat’s just restless because you haven’t been practicing enough witchcraft. Cats crave communion with the dark spirits of the netherworld. You may want to summon a small shadow demon or two so she has someone to play with.
Norwegian black rock?
My first wife had a psycho kitty once. We suspect he’d been abused or starved as a kitten before she adopted him. Any chance that might have happened to your cat?
Also, what color is your cat’s fur? That may have something to do with his color preferences.
Breakthrough! Good going!
I had a similar experience with a feral cat I brought inside last winter. She’d hiss, scratch, and bite if I got too friendly. Then one day a few weeks later she just hopped into my lap and started purring.
Prince was known for purple, so that may be pushing it. How about Black Sabbath?
Stockhausen.
We’re talking about a cat here. Isn’t expecting rationality or predictability a bit… excessive?
Finally sez the cat, PZ dresses in sensible heat absorbing fur. Next, don those black leather gauntlets for stroking the beast.
Cement the bond with a shared hobby.
Note the tail twitch. Cat is like, “Why you keep playing over me? This is supposed to be my solo, and you keep butting in!”
Don’t darker colors absorb more heat? Maybe she just wants to be warm.
I was told when I took my cat home that she wasn’t the cuddly type. Yeah, this cat loves to sit on my chest, curl up and purr loudly. Especially when I have an anxiety attack. So she’s either trying to kill me or heal me.
I know you’re mostly joking, but it’s still useful to remember that unlike us, pursuit predators, cats are ambush predators. Of course they’re going to behave differently than we expect.