Nah, we’re more True Neutral. We do whatever suits our purposes, with little regard for alignment.
PZ
The Persian Scholar reminds me of you.
ledasmomsays
I assume a Maine Coon berserker would fling itself randomly at people and purr them to death. We had one at work the other day. Only time he stopped purring was when he actually had a needle in his neck for a blood draw or in his abdomen for a biopsy. Thirteen pounds of cat that wants to be cuddled and patted in between x-rays starts to weigh a little heavy when you’re already wearing a lead apron.
praesays
Cats “playing” with mice definitely qualifies as evil. As for chaotic: “Chaos implies freedom, adaptability, and flexibility. On the downside, chaos can include recklessness, resentment toward legitimate authority, arbitrary actions, and irresponsibility”. If that isn’t cat, I don’t know what is.
blfsays
What makes one think the monsters aren’t playing D&D? Of course they are. Long pigs are the pieces, the world’s the set, albeit the “rules” aren’t quite the ones you know. Purr… and the long pig does something. Sharpen claws… and the long pig does something else. “Play” (heh, heh) with a ball of yarn… and the long pig does yet another thing. Not use the litterbox… and giggle as the long pig goes berserk. I believe points are accumulated as the long pig bangs her or his head on the desk (extra points if it’s hits the wall instead), or when the long pig in the hidden volcano lair petting the white cat thinks she or he(the long pig) is the one in control.
I’m not quite sure how trebuchets and the mildly deranged penguin fits into the game, albeit she(the mildly deranged penguin) says it’s either as a way of moving rapidly from one part / place of action to another, or else is a roll of die. Or maybe just an invocation of the “cat descending rapidly from sky” spell.
@WMDKitty — Survivor #5 – True Neutral comes with a devotion to the concept of moral balance. Absolute law brings stagnation while absolute chaos brings madness; blind devotion to the cause of either good or evil comes at a terrible cost. In an East Asian themed campaign, the true neutral druid would be replaced by the Taoist Master: every yang must be countered by an equal and opposite yin.
If cats played D&D they’d be a good aligned Drow Ranger for reasons that the more experienced players will be too kind to laugh at.
DLCsays
Maine Coon berserker. Yup. I had one of those, in the dim mists of history. He’d fight a dog, chase a raccoon up a tree . . . He once growled at someone who was a guest in our house and who was getting pissy with me. One of the best cats I ever had a pleasure to live with. (make no mistake… you don’t own a cat. Cats deign to live with you. )
chigau (違う) says
fuckitthen
microraptor says
My cat’s kinda lazy. I’m pretty sure she’d be a 12 level NPC.
Azkyroth, B*Cos[F(u)]==Y says
I imagine Umbriel would enjoy the dice.
ironflange says
ALL cats are chaotic evil.
WMDKitty -- Survivor says
ironflange
Nah, we’re more True Neutral. We do whatever suits our purposes, with little regard for alignment.
PZ
The Persian Scholar reminds me of you.
ledasmom says
I assume a Maine Coon berserker would fling itself randomly at people and purr them to death. We had one at work the other day. Only time he stopped purring was when he actually had a needle in his neck for a blood draw or in his abdomen for a biopsy. Thirteen pounds of cat that wants to be cuddled and patted in between x-rays starts to weigh a little heavy when you’re already wearing a lead apron.
prae says
Cats “playing” with mice definitely qualifies as evil. As for chaotic: “Chaos implies freedom, adaptability, and flexibility. On the downside, chaos can include recklessness, resentment toward legitimate authority, arbitrary actions, and irresponsibility”. If that isn’t cat, I don’t know what is.
blf says
What makes one think the monsters aren’t playing D&D? Of course they are. Long pigs are the pieces, the world’s the set, albeit the “rules” aren’t quite the ones you know. Purr… and the long pig does something. Sharpen claws… and the long pig does something else. “Play” (heh, heh) with a ball of yarn… and the long pig does yet another thing. Not use the litterbox… and giggle as the long pig goes berserk. I believe points are accumulated as the long pig bangs her or his head on the desk (extra points if it’s hits the wall instead), or when the long pig in the hidden volcano lair petting the white cat thinks she or he(the long pig) is the one in control.
I’m not quite sure how trebuchets and the mildly deranged penguin fits into the game, albeit she(the mildly deranged penguin) says it’s either as a way of moving rapidly from one part / place of action to another, or else is a roll of die. Or maybe just an invocation of the “cat descending rapidly from sky” spell.
johnson catman says
WMDKitty — Survivor @5:
Exactly what I was thinking!
YOB - Ye Olde Blacksmith says
That art is just screaming “Make us into a game and/or comic!” (In the vein of Mice & Mystics)
Gregory in Seattle says
Yes, but if cats lived D & D: Kitten Wars.
Gregory in Seattle says
@WMDKitty — Survivor #5 – True Neutral comes with a devotion to the concept of moral balance. Absolute law brings stagnation while absolute chaos brings madness; blind devotion to the cause of either good or evil comes at a terrible cost. In an East Asian themed campaign, the true neutral druid would be replaced by the Taoist Master: every yang must be countered by an equal and opposite yin.
That ain’t cants.
williamgeorge says
If cats played D&D they’d be a good aligned Drow Ranger for reasons that the more experienced players will be too kind to laugh at.
DLC says
Maine Coon berserker. Yup. I had one of those, in the dim mists of history. He’d fight a dog, chase a raccoon up a tree . . . He once growled at someone who was a guest in our house and who was getting pissy with me. One of the best cats I ever had a pleasure to live with. (make no mistake… you don’t own a cat. Cats deign to live with you. )