It’s gotta be tough to be a Texan

Ophelia Benson is having a giggle over the Texas Republican Party Platform, which you can download, too. It’s the usual: guns, US out of the UN, immigrants must be controlled, etc. They really don’t like homosexuals.

We believe that the practice of homosexuality tears at the fabric of society, contributes to the breakdown of the family unit, and leads to the spread of dangerous, communicable diseases. Homosexual behavior is contrary to the fundamental, unchanging truths that have been ordained by God, recognized by our country’s founders, and shared by the majority of Texans. Homosexuality must not be presented as an acceptable “alternative” lifestyle in our public education and policy, nor should “family” be redefined to include homosexual “couples.” We are opposed to any granting of special legal entitlements, refuse to recognize, or grant special privileges including, but not limited to: marriage between persons of the same sex (regardless of state of origin), custody of children by homosexuals, homosexual partner insurance or retirement benefits. We oppose any criminal or civil penalties against those who oppose homosexuality out of faith, conviction, or belief in traditional values.

They don’t like heterosexuals, either, since they want to arrest a bunch of them.

We oppose the legalization of sodomy. We demand that Congress exercise its authority granted by the U.S. Constitution to withhold jurisdiction from the federal courts from cases involving sodomy.

I wonder if they’re going to go high tech and install surveillance cameras in everyone’s bedroom, or if they’re satisfied with the old school system of spot checks and bashing in bedroom doors?

Probably low tech, since Texas Republicans don’t care much for that sciencey stuff.

We oppose any legislation that would allow for the creation and/or killing of human embryos for medical research. We encourage stem cell research using cells from umbilical cords, from adults, and from any other means which does not kill human embryos. We oppose any state funding of research that destroys/kills human embryos. We encourage the adoption of existing embryos. We call for legislation to withhold state and/or federal funding from institutions that engage in scientific research involving the killing of human embryos or human cloning.

Evolution gets a mention, too — it’s one of those suspicious theories, along with global warming and “political philosophies”…I guess there are no such things as “political philosophies”, only the one true absolute political reality of Ronald Reagan.

Realizing that conflict and debate is a proven learning tool in classrooms, we support objective teaching and equal treatment of all sides of scientific theories, including evolution, Intelligent Design, global warming, political philosophies, and others. We believe theories of life origins and environmental theories should be taught as challengeable scientific theory subject to change as new data is produced, not scientific law. Teachers and students should be able to discuss the strengths and weaknesses of these theories openly and without fear of retribution or discrimination of any kind.

Hang on, though, let’s not just laugh at Texas: they also did something right recently. A Texas federal court has refused the Institute of Creation Research’s plea to be allowed to hand out science degrees. That’s got to sting, after the ICR left California to settle in Texas, hoping for a more lenient, accommodating atmosphere for lunacy. Even Texas has limits.

Now if only Texas’s limits weren’t so slack as to tolerate the Republicans down there…