At last, this sounds like a practical solution:
In an open letter, the girlfriends of more than 40 priests have called for a relaxation of the church’s stance on celibacy to allow a limited range of sexual practices, including the reverse Dutch Steamboat, the Stockholm Slip’n’Slide and the Sorcerer’s Apprentice.
There are more details at the link, but it is not recommended if you are not in a raunch-friendly environment.