Aren’t the titles and the nobility and castles and the armies of serfs enough?


The Countess has been nominated for various awards for her writing, and she’d like our help in getting the word out.

I warned her that you people aren’t a flock of sheep who will just follow the beckoning, nubile arm of any horror/fantasy author who cocks an enticing eyebrow at them, so I twisted her arm a bit. If she wins an award with our help, she will write a story just for us. Isn’t that incentive enough? I thought about demanding that it include cephalopods, but decided I’d rather be surprised. So go vote, maybe we’ll get a story!

(Does anyone else feel a bit like a Lost Boy now?)

Comments

  1. says

    Thanks so much, PZ, and all the Pharyngulites. I’d love to win in at least one of the categories. I’d be happy just to place. And yes, I will write an erotic story just for Pharyngula if I win. There are so many possible story ideas out there.

  2. says

    Are we able to sample the work somewhere? I wandered around a while but couldn’t find anything. I’m reluctant to vote blindly, even at the request of The Man.

  3. Burning Umbrella says

    If the Mudlicker doesn’t qualify as a “hopeful monster”, nothing will.

  4. says

    Isherwood, I have excerpts from some of my fiction on my blog and on Yahoo groups.

    Here is an excerpt from “Mud Licker”:

    http://trishwilson.typepad.com/blog/2008/12/im-posting-at-deadly-vixens-today.html

    My “eXcessica” category on my blog has excerpts from the short stories “Caught!”, “A Spanking Good Time”, and “Double Shift” (in my anthology “Summer Heat”):

    http://trishwilson.typepad.com/blog/excessica/

    That’s a good start. :)

  5. Patricia, OM says

    Hokey smoke, professor! That’s one long gauntlet to run in voting. Good thing I gorged on trollkill before I set off on the journey. *school girl giggles*

  6. says

    Okay, if you say we’re not a flock of sheep, then we’re not. Whatever you say.

    By the way, I am dying to know: Am I an independent thinker? I sure hope so, but I need someone to tell me!

  7. Bride of Shrek OM says

    “Does anyone else feel a bit like a Lost Boy now?”

    I kind of thought PZ was more of a Corey Haim type but if he wants to think he’s a Keifer Sutherland with fangs then who am I to argue.

    (ok, yes, I saw Lost Boys about ten million times when I was 13)

  8. says

    It’s a conspiracy to make me feel old. No, no, no. “Lost boy” as in Peter Pan. Little boys who just want a mother to tuck them in and read them a story? Wendy? Jeez.

  9. says

    Ick. I forgot about “Lost Boys: The Tribe”. Yes, it sucked.

    LOL, let me tuck you in a read all of you a story involving tentacle sex. :)

  10. Patricia, OM says

    Zeno, You are a wildly witty independent thinker, the cutest boy in class, and all the girls are swooning just at the sight of your name.

  11. NewEnglandBob says

    Zeno!

    Come over here!

    Sit!

    Now this is what you are going to do, and say, and think…….

  12. says

    “You are a wildly witty independent thinker, the cutest boy in class, and all the girls are swooning just at the sight of your name.”

    My mom used to say the same things. She also said women liked smart guys and college was a good idea. She lied.

  13. says

    Ha ha, NewEnglandBob! Good try! But it didn’t work when my pastor told me what to do and think and I don’t think it will work with you, either. ;-)

    The cutest boy in class, Patricia? Wow, I haven’t heard that in years. :-)

  14. Patricia, OM says

    NewEnglandBob, you stop flirting with Zeno! He’s far too independent and absurdly handsome to fall for that.

  15. Brownian, OM says

    My mom used to say the same things. She also said women liked smart guys and college was a good idea. She lied.

    Your mom sounds like my mom. Did you get the “the mailman and I are just friends and your superficial resemblance to him is a coincidence” line too?

  16. Parker says

    I’m sorry, but I’m cruising yahoo answers right now and came across this absolute gem of a question. I had to share it with someone.

    “How is evolution real if theirs still monkies?
    okay.. if people “evolved” from monkies than why r there still monkies here?…doesnt make much since if u think about it.. i read alot and the 2nd law of theruomodynamics or something says that evolution cant be real ether. science really proves itself wrong if u think about it. y do scientists think that there right just because its science. OTHER SCIENCE PROOVES IT WRONG! dont critizise me and say im dumb. im smart and probly smarter then u u know. its seems to me like only cretionism is a good reason for how stuff was made…kinda have to be dumm not to think that.”

    I just love this. I think we should petition Webster and his dictionaries and forever change the plural form of ‘monkey’ to ‘monkies’

  17. Burning Umbrella says

    Monkies have a honorary position in The Imperial Zoo of Creationist Stupidity, right next to the crocoduck.

  18. Quiet_Desperation says

    LOL, let me tuck you in a read all of you a story involving tentacle sex. :)

    Ah. You have a bright future in hentai anime. :-)

  19. mandrake says

    I am so wise wrote:
    “She also said women liked smart guys and college was a good idea. She lied.”

    Well I know *lots* of women who like smart guys – but maybe it’s different in San Francisco, land of Geeksexy?

  20. Patricia, OM says

    Brownian, is that another of your redheaded step children @22? Shall I make you up a sugar tit for him?

    I don’t know how you put up with those pesky brats.

  21. scooter says

    My mom used to say

    My mom used to say, “The bail is how much?!!

    Call back after the arraignmant.”

    Hey Contessa, your website emits some very invasive software that will be blocked by any intranet software, which means nobody can get to it from work, which means half the electorate cannot vote since many Pharyngulistas are malingering work slackers like me.

  22. scooter says

    HEY

    CUT IT OUT with the alter boy boning stuff.

    I’m getting all excited here, and…

    welll
    women are attracted to smart men

    with big boners

    (sorry for the typos, I broke my thumb a couple of days ago, not recommended)-scooter

  23. Patricia, OM says

    Hey Scooter, bitchslap that little twerp standing in the corner. I’m holding a champagne glass. Thanks!

  24. scooter says

    I thought all the trailer trash mudsuckers were sobering up by now. Got to get back to work cleaning stalls at the peep show, pickin Mom up at the strip club, and gettin another batch of ephedrine into the speed still.

    Somebody call this hayseed’s mom, he’s out too late and needs to go home and stare at the ceiling all night

  25. Peter McKellar says

    Good luck Countess. I agree with Patricia, OM, thats quite a procedure, but then this is a real poll, not a pointless poll.

    You were placed between 3rd or 4th and 13th with most clustering around 5th. you were tied for 7th place on one.

    The excert from Mudlicker caught my interest, I will search that out – though I was expecting a cephlapod ;)

    Do you have any favourites yourself?

  26. Patricia, OM says

    Thanks Scooter. I knew I could count on you being too much of a gentleman to make a strumpet put down her champagne.

  27. Katkinkate says

    Off Topic alert: The rubber duckies that NASA sent on an undersea voyage of discovery may have been found – in Adelaide! http://www.abc.net.au/news The recording of a phone call to ABC Radio National is on the bottom right hand side of the screen (under the picture of a rubber duckie with a number on its back).

  28. Patricia, OM says

    Thanks Brownian. I’m doing my best to swill the celebratory bubbly, so if you could keep your rude little brutes locked up it would help.

    Scooter has to go clean the stalls at the porn shop, and he doesn’t have time to stand around slapping twerps while I get swozzled.

  29. Wowbagger says

    Off Topic alert: The rubber duckies that NASA sent on an undersea voyage of discovery may have been found – in Adelaide!

    Many good and interesting things find their way to Adelaide…

  30. clinteas says

    Havent read any of the stories and not going to vote therefore,but I like the link to the “Erotic Toy reviews” on her blog.

    Thanks for that,PZ !

  31. Kirian says

    Holy crap. I’m one of the backup host servers for P&E, from way *way* back in my days with Critters. (My writing days are, alas, essentially past.) Never thought I’d end up vaguely connected to another Critter through this sort of small-world circle. Congrats, Countess!

  32. Katkinkate says

    Re the duckies, I may have been premature in posting that comment. I have since done some more research and the photo and description doesn’t match the official description.

    “The ducks have Behar’s e-mail address stamped on them, along with the word “reward” in three languages, including Inuit. NASA is offering $100 to the first person who locates a duck, London’s Guardian newspaper notes.”

    Oh well. Robyn will figure it out. (Robyn Williams, head of ABC Science Unit :) )

  33. says

    @Scooter – Hey Contessa, your website emits some very invasive software that will be blocked by any intranet software, which means nobody can get to it from work, which means half the electorate cannot vote since many Pharyngulistas are malingering work slackers like me.

    Gack! That must be a Typepad thing. I doubt I can remove any of it. LOL, malingering work slackers. I write sex toys reviews while watching movies like “Supervixens” (and I own that one). I could never work in a real office. I’d go apeshit in no time.