1. Nerd of Redhead says

    Stand up, clap, wave, cheer. Still feels good at home? Not quite the same, but still good. Many well wishes to clan Myers.

  2. says

    Whee! Three cheers for Connlann!

    Even though his parents couldn’t be there, maybe he can find comfort in the fact that they obviously care very much for him and are very proud of him and his achievement.

  3. porco dio says

    jeez PZ, next time get an hotel!!!!

    but congratulations and all nonetheless

    does he have a blog yet?

  4. says

    Just before my graduation from college I had a dream we were all in the stadium. The speaker said, “you may all rise and and receive your diplomas.” But then he pointed at me and said “everyone but YOU!!!” I woke up in a cold sweat! Congrats and Happy Money to you.

  5. says

    Happy Monkey! And I hope your boy finds a way to get home for the holidays, even though he’s isolated in the wilds of Wisconsin.

  6. says


    You moron, there is more snow on the ground in Minnesota right now than there is ground, you could literally build tiny snow caverns in some places.

  7. says

    Well, at least thanks to the marvels of the interweb, you got to see him graduate, even though you couldn’t be there in person. Congrats to Connlann and yay for the Myers family!

  8. ggab says

    Connlann Amergyn Myers?
    That may cause some confusion.
    Can we just call him Bruce?

    Happy Monkey to all the Myers clan.

  9. jfatz says

    Obviously God is punishing you for being so much like Adolf Hitler. All of the other people halted from attending the ceremonies by the weather are simply casualties of your intolerance as well!

    Also, they probably deserved it.


  10. Nerd of Redhead says

    What’s his degree?

    English Literature. All hail the might Connlann on this degree day.

  11. Tim says

    Congratulations, not getting “Happy monkey”, but it might sound great in Peter Sellers Clouseau voice.

  12. Menyambal says

    Congratulations to all. Graduations are always amazing–even though I skipped one of mine, I’ve been proud to bursting when I’ve attended any of my family’s. Sorry you couldn’t be there, but you were there in monkey, you know.

    Happy Monkey.

  13. DominEditrix says

    Congratulations to the proud parents & the graduate. Has anyone thought of hiring some sled dogs to get the kid home for the holidays [or, well, for good, given that he’s graduated…]?

  14. Uncephalized says

    PZ, just wondering, what possessed you to name your children Connlann and Skatje? They’re cool names and all, but where did they even come from?

  15. ExitB says

    In two years of almost daily monitoring I rarely post here. For this one I must. Congratulations, Connlann! Happy Monkey, PZ!

  16. says

    Happy monkey to the Myers clan and Connlann in particular.

    For those asking about Connlann’s name, connlan is a somewhat archaic Irish word for “hero”, but just for today, he might prefer my linguistically creative alternative: the suffix “lann” (two n’s) means “repository or storage place of/for” (e.g. leabharlann means “library” where leabhar means “book”); when you see “somethinglann“, you know it’s a place where “somethings” are kept in some way; conn can mean “sense”, “reason”, “meaning”, or “counsel”, so connlann could mean “repository of reason/sense/counsel”, which seems somewhat appropriate on graduation day.

  17. Samantha Vimes says

    Cool, Emmett. “Repository of reason” seems like the perfect name for one of PZ’s kids. :)

    Congrats and Happy Monkey to him!

  18. Robert Byers says

    From Canada
    Since the bible says ‘the fool has said in his heart there is no God” and the possibility is that this person is like the crowd here then maybe this is not a legitamate reward/recognition foe efforts/success in scholkarship but a atheist quota.
    Probably, if not indeed certainly, not. Yet Mr Myers is a typical, maybe not, liberal who believes the government, society, and everybody should interfere with who gets what in higher edycation and life generally based on identity/race/sex.
    Then they enjoy when their crowd gets stuff. While compliant with others not getting what they would , fair and square, because of ethnic/sex quotas and the like.
    Yes there is a problem with identityism in higher education. Yet it all comes down to interefering with the American man, or people, by segregated identities in the country. Too many Jews, Asians, pushing one way and Blacks, Mexicans, women pushing, by quotas and a culture of ‘quota results agenda” the other way.

    Anyways contgrats to this guy on his legitimate acheivment and all the best in furture deeds with what he has gained by his education.

  19. RickrOll says

    Congratulations on the success of you and yours! May it continue. With my help, of course ;)

  20. says

    Congrats to you Connlann!
    Hope you get to celebrate with just the right ammount of fornication and all other fun stuff you might stumble across.

    – I know I did in the same situation, hehe :D

    Cheers and happy solstice/Jol to all of you!

  21. says


    The proper response for this thread would have been your last sentence, alone. The rest is inappropriate asshattery. Keep it to threads where it might be considered at least tangenitally relevant.

  22. CrypticLife says

    Now I’m curious about Skatje’s middle name.

    ConnLann’s only odd for people used to Michaels and Matthews and little else. Picking names can be difficult, and in a multicultural society can have many influences. ConnLann’s easily pronounceable, and has a good composition of sounds.

  23. Nerd of Redhead says

    Una, every comment from Byers makes no sense unless you have the same mental illness he does. He’s just a total fool, and keeps showing that by posting here. Put him in your killfile, or just skip that post if you seen his name.

  24. Fly in the Ointment says

    Yes, revel in your secular achievements, liberal Godhaters. For they hold set you on the path of unrighteousness and inequity. A diploma, a birth, a lottery win or a death in the family are all works of the Lord, yet you would think that this child was able to do something to change God’s mind–make himself into something God had not made. His degree is meaningless. Your blog is meaningless. I pray for all you proud Godhating rebellious children.

    In Christ I pray for you.

  25. Nerd of Redhead says

    In Christ imaginary deities I pray mentally masturbate for you.

    There, fixed it for you.

  26. says

    @ Fly

    So, you’re saying that, should someone happen upon you in the street, and start slapping the crap out of you, that would be god’s will and doing?

    Let me go find my Slappin’ Pants. I gots me a new hobby.

  27. Nick Gotts says

    What a nasty little shit you are, Fly in the Ointment – and this applies whether you are for real, or a Poe. You even have to poke your filthy nose in when a parent is rejoicing in the achievements of their child.

    Yech! I wipe you from my shoe.

  28. Fly in the Ointment says

    I fear none of you ignorant thugs. If you slap me, beat me, whatever. I am stronger than you for I serve the real God.

    In Christ.

  29. God says

    I am stronger than you for I serve the real God.

    Matthew 7:21-7:23

    In Christ.

    Matthew 6:1-6:7

    Just saying.

  30. Nerd of Redhead says

    I am stronger weaker minded than you for I serve the real God unprovable imaginary being.
    In Christ unproved mythman.

    Fixed it for your again.

  31. Fly in the Ointment says

    Matthew 7:24
    “Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock.”

    Do not be so proud or think you can out-bible others. Your ignorance is all you will display.

    In Christ.

  32. Satan says

    “Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock.”

    Which you are not doing.

    Do not be so proud or think you can out-bible others. Your ignorance is all you will display.

    Glad to see that you’re proud of your ignorance.

    See you real soon!

  33. Patricia, OM says

    What’s the matter Byers? Feeling sorry for yourself that your made up, worthless god won’t force me to suffer in silence anymore? Can’t take it when women speak up?

    Give it up Byers. Prayin’ won’t save you, and cryin’ don’t help.

  34. says

    I see that Fly, like most trolls would, missed my point (deliberately or not). Given that all actions and events in Fly’s world are apparently directed by the invisible superbeing, I am responsible for neither the occurence of distribution of my slapping. If it happens to land on an asshat, so be it, it’s superbeings’ will.

    It is this attitude that, frankly, frightens more than most godbotting. People talk about atheists having no moral compass, but when every single action can be attributed to the will of a being already described as having unfathomable purposes and plans, then any and all actions are fair game. All murders, rapes, genocides, poisonings, car accidents — god’s will, dontcha know. There’s nothing stopping any action, because it’s foreordained that Cap’n Deity wanted it that way. I’m confused as to how it makes us non-believers evil, as all of our actions are obviously the will of god, including the fact we don’t believe. We’ve been damned, but not of our own free will! Of course, then, Fly has no free will on the insipid, simmering hostility thing, either.

    Now, backing off from the usual determinist discussions of free will, when you don’t assume a greater plan exists, it throws much more responsibility on the shoulders of the individual. Personally, I think it is a far more ethical thing to be accountable to one’s own actions and the consequences than to chalk it up ineffable inevitability.

    Of course, Fly either understands this, and is just trolling, or Fly is just an idiot who scarily believes that any course of action is moral, just and right(well, Fly might not, but that’s the logical conclusion of his/her/its arguments). Either way, I’m not really going on a slap-fest (as fun as that might be), because I at least think I’m accountable for my own actions.

    I still want me some Slappin’ Pants, though. Just in case.

  35. Nick Gotts says

    Patricia, OM
    You think Fly is Byers? Why? It doesn’t demonstrate the verbal diarrhoea Byers makes us suffer from, preferring the minimal-hostages-to-fortune approach of many godbotting trolls. Also, no evidence of racism or antisemitism as yet – just general nastiness.

  36. Nerd of Redhead says

    That lying moron Wagner is loose again. Piss off, Wagner.

    Ah, that explains the foul troll odor.

  37. Nerd of Redhead says

    The fact that you’re a lying moron. Piss off.

    Now don’t insult morons by comparing he who shall not be named to them. Lying slime mold is more like it.

  38. E.V. says

    It was such a sincerely good thread until the Christards showed up. Any hope they’ll succumb to suicidal ideation?

  39. Brownian, OM says

    It was such a sincerely good thread until the Christards showed up. Any hope they’ll succumb to suicidal ideation?

    Alas, if only. All salvationist religions have, out of necessity, some sort of anti-suicide crap built in to them. Since they all have the purpose of placating the peasants with promises of post-life paradise proportional to their present pathos, they’ve gotta prevent the perceptive from prising out that they could push off this mortal coil in favour of the perennial picnic.

    It’s only well for the priest-kings to convince the peons and untouchables that they’ll be better off in some indeterminate future life until the peons start killing themselves off, leaving the economy in a serious indentured-labour deficit.

    ‘Dharma’, ‘God’s will’: they’re all just names for the pipe through which one huffs Marx’s opiate.

  40. says

    What is it about Christfags that makes them think we want to hear what they have to say? Surely they’ve made their point by now.

  41. Nerd of Redhead says

    Surely they’ve made their point by now.

    That presumes they are smart enough to have a point. I doubt is fly has a point other than trolling.

  42. says

    Wagner has been banned repeatedly, yet he keeps coming back. Byers gets nothing but a torrent of abuse, yet he keeps coming back. Fly is small fry compared to those.

  43. ctenotrish says

    Ctenotrish here, chiming in with a hearty congrats to Connlann! Having collected a few degrees myself here and there, I know the feeling of happiness and accomplishment. And congrats to PZ and his lovely other half as well. :) Sorry the nasty weather prevented y’all from being there in person . . .

    Something vaguely similar happened to my folks and me when my brother graduated with his MS. He had a rare memory lapse and forgot our tickets, so we had to watch his graduation from the student center (MSC, Texas A&M, College Station). It actually was great! The chairs were deep, comfy leather, there were plenty of snacks and softdrinks, we shopped in the bookstore, and generally had a great time. I still have (somewhere) the picture I took of my brother as he walked across the stage – pic is of the TV, but we clapped and cheered. Happy Monkey!

    PS, is it just me, or are the obnoxious posters *particularly* obnoxious today?

  44. Brownian, OM says

    PS, is it just me, or are the obnoxious posters *particularly* obnoxious today?

    Sorry ctenotrish; I’ll try to tone it down.

  45. Nerd of Redhead says

    Kel, I think he who has been banned just likes to thumb his nose at PZ for banning him. Hey look, you really can’t ban me. Lalalalalalalala. Very childish, but such childish behavior (I’ve waded through the archives) is why he was banned in the first place. Byers just doesn’t care about responses, as long as he unloads his offal.

  46. Patricia, OM says

    No, I don’t think Fly is Byers. Byers is some old fool, and I think Fly is a punk. Perhaps my brain has gone soft if I sounded otherwise.

  47. Brownian, OM says

    The Great Spirit (who I’m assuming is some sort of representative of Vishnu) wrote:

    What exactly is it about me that generates such intense hostility?

    Instead of responding to you as if you were a genuine human being, I’m just going to cut and paste a speech from Gandhi to the UN that has nothing to do with the topic at hand:

    It is, however, with all these things as the background that I want Englishmen, Europeans and all the United Nations to examine in their hearts what crime had India committed in demanding Independence. I ask, is it right for you to distrust such an organization with all its background, tradition and record of over half a century and misrepresent its endeavors before all the world by every means at your command? Is it right that by hook or by crook, aided by the foreign press, aided by the President of the U.S.A., or even by the Generalissimo of China who has yet to win his laurels, you should present India’s struggle in shocking caricature? I have met the Generalissimo. I have known him through Madame Shek who was my interpreter; and though he seemed inscrutable to me, not so Madame Shek; and he allowed me to read his mind through her. There is a chorus of disapproval and righteous protest all over the world against us. They say we are erring, the move is inopportune. I had great regard for British diplomacy which has enabled them to hold the Empire so long. Now it stinks in my nostrils, and others have studied that diplomacy and are putting it into practice. They may succeed in getting, through these methods, world opinion on their side for a time; but India will speak against that world opinion. She will raise her voice against all the organized propaganda. I will speak against it. Even if all the United Nations opposed me, even if the whole of India forsakes me, I will say, “You are wrong. India will wrench with non-violence her liberty from unwilling hands.” I will go ahead not for India’s sake alone, but for the sake of the world. Even if my eyes close before there is freedom, non-violence will not end. They will be dealing a mortal blow to China and to Russia if they oppose the freedom of non-violent India which is pleading with bended knees for the fulfillment of debt along overdue. Does a creditor ever go to debtor like that? And even when, India is met with such angry opposition, she says, “We won’t hit below the belt, we have learnt sufficient gentlemanliness. We are pledged to non-violence.” I have been the author of non-embarrassment policy of the Congress and yet today you find me talking this strong language. I say it is consistent with our honour. If a man holds me by the neck and wants to drawn me, may I not struggle to free myself directly? There is no inconsistency in our position today.

    Ignoring the lack of moral pretense in the excerpt I’ve copied, see any similarities between what I just did and what you continually do, asshole?

  48. Donovan says

    Congratulations, Prof Myers and Prof. Jr.

    I takes quite an effort to attain a degree, and all pride is well placed. I am sorry, Prof Myers, that you had to miss the moment. Graduation from a university (a real one, not a Liberty type) is the closest thing to a baptism I think I approve of. I hope he continues in his father’s footsteps with intellectual honesty and integrity.

    *Not kissing up, just being nice for the celebration. Later, I would like to add how cephelapods suck! Nematodes RULE!!!!

  49. E.V. says

    To show that I have a firm grasp of the obvious, I will avow Wagner is willfully obstinate and ignorant. (and has been banned once again).

  50. Nick Gotts, OM says

    Oh BTW, congratulations, Connlann Amergyn Myers!
    (Where did you get that name PZ? I had to copy-paste to be sure I’d get it right!)

  51. revjimbob says

    They certainly put them through at some rate if this picture is of the students receiving their awards. I work as a technician at a Scottish university and video our graduations. Our graduands get their name called – walk to the front, get capped and get their award, and the next one called only as the first is walking away – here they look as if they are in a queue.

  52. Sili says

    Congrats Connlann!

    Now, would someone explain to me the point of this sorta brouhahah?

    We have something similar for the 6th form here. I spent the day sleeping in.

    Rather annoyingly I then actually had to call them up to get my exam result sent to me.