I completely missed it — Chuck Norris made a couple of roundhouse face kicks at godless evolutionists last week, and I didn’t even notice. Apparently, we’ve been trying to outlaw Christianity, and Norris has scuttled that plan by exposing our devious strategy of being sufficiently literate to write books, and sending our kids to summer camps that lack religious indoctrination.
Zachary Moore has the complete breakdown of the Atheist Conspiracy’s 5-year plan. Now’s the part where I laugh my movie villain laugh and taunt my feeble, brain-damaged opponent as I launch my nefarious onslaught. “You are helpless to stop me, Chuck Norris! Bwahahahahaha!”
“But wait, what’s this? Your young sidekick, here to wreak vengeance for his master’s defeat? And it’s…Kirk Cameron??!?!? Bwahahaha! Hahahaha! Bwaha…<villain laughs himself into an apoplectic stroke, writhes helplessly on the ground>”
The day is only saved for villainy because Cameron rushes forward to punch himself repeatedly in the face, while Norris incontinently soaks his pants and whimpers for the nurse to bring him a mallowmar.
It brings to mind Voltaire’s comment:
I have never made but one prayer to God, a very short one: “O Lord make my enemies ridiculous.” And God granted it.
Atheist’s prayers must be particularly potent, because god has responded with extravagant excess.