To Student Worried Because God Wrote That God Has Been Kicked Out Of School

Dear Concerned Student,

Your correspondent is not god. God could not be kicked out of schools or anywhere else. Like an 800 pound gorilla, god can stay anywhere he/she wants.

The real problem is because our nation has put god’s name on the money and in the pledge in violation of the Third Commandment (Second, if you are Roman Catholic). Don’t know what that is? Look it up. And tell us please why you want the Ten Commandments posted everywhere if you don’t know what they are.

Also, maybe because we go to church on the first day of the week instead of on the seventh day of the week as god ordered in the Fourth Commandment (Third, if you are Roman Catholic).

Or, maybe because we make and worship graven images as god condemned in the Second Command (deleted if you are Roman Catholic and like to make and worship graven images).

Or maybe it is because we pray in public after Jesus condemned such practices in Matthew 6: 6.

Jesus warned that anyone who ignored his teachings would be like one who built their house upon the sand.

Or maybe it is because people have been taken in by Satan who wants to make sure every product of conception is born, as unwanted unloved children will grow up to commit crimes and do violent things and thereby help get more people to Satan’s place.

And maybe it is also because we do not want children or anyone else to understand how the world really works and therefore we teach and support myths and ignorant beliefs instead of teaching such things as have been learned and then trying as hard as we can to find out information about things we do not know.

All of this, and more, is set forth in the book, “Baubles of Blasphemy,” by

Edwin Kagin


  1. kantalope says

    I think their point is that since they, the fundamentalists, don’t know what is in the 10 commandments, that if those commandments are posted everywhere then even people that don’t know what is in the 10 commandments (like the heathens or gentiles or whatever term), they won’t know it as well as the they themselves…..or something.

    You are infringing upon their right to infringe upon others, and they won’t stand for it!!11

    I think I need some random caps in that statement to make it right…not sure.

  2. Kevin says

    Point is, pray all you like. Pray every single second of every waking minute, in school or out of school. Nobody will try to stop you — as long as you keep said prayers inside your own damn melon.

    But having said that, you still should take time off from praying in order to study for the algebra test. Cuz your god ain’t gonna do your studying for you, nor pour the solution to the test equations into your head.

  3. piranhaintheguppytank says

    When it comes to the seemingly endless ways that Xtians sidestep their own beliefs, this line sums it up:

    You can ignore traffic laws if you love the sheriff.”

    Another example:

    Skeptic: Didn’t Jesus warn that “it is easier for a camel to pass through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God”?

    Typical Xtian: Yes, but Jesus didn’t say anything about the condition of the camel. You see, if you first chop the camel up into tiny tiny bits…

    Translation: I’m keeping my stuff no matter what Jesus said.

    Xtians are tireless in their efforts to squeeze the proverbial camel through the eye of the needle, even to the point of turning the poor camel into hamburger.

    If indeed “strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, and few there be that find it” (Matthew 7:13-14), is it really prudent for Christians to take such risks?

    Surely, the only certain way to be spared from hell-fire is to follow Jesus’ teachings as written. But I think we know that no Christian is going to do that. Christians cherry-pick the bible for things they would probably do anyway and discard things that are inconvenient.

    They will rationalize away the parts of the bible they find troubling, or which contain blatant errors, or which clearly reek of superstition, and then take comfort in the belief that THEIR “interpretation” of the bible is in perfect accordance with the almighty’s intent.

    Another relevant quote (possibly paraphrased) from the website cited above: “Christians make up their own rules and then pretend God agrees with them.”

  4. janiceintoronto says

    Yes, God has been taken out of your school. He will not be back.

    You can thank us now.

    We boiled him and ate him at an atheist convention.

    He was a bit stringy, but all in all, not too bad with a little H&P sauce poured on.

  5. baal says

    I’m usually up on esoterica so was surprised and pleased to learn that the Catholics dropped the graven images one. I was more or less one a long time ago and had no idea.

    I wonder if the crucifix gets out of the scope since that god is three parts (at least after NT, OT is not so 3 parter).

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