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Mar 01 2013

Be gentle, sweet, and kind

One of these trolls — in this case, one populating the #WISCFI twitter hashtag for the Women in Secularism conference — threw out a recommendation to all the ladies out there: 8 Easy Tips to Act More Feminine. It’s not clear whether this person was being cynical, mocking, or serious, but at least we can all concur that he was being stupid.

Here are the 8 tips summarized. Please, control your temper (tips #4, 5, 6, and 8).

  1. Dress feminine.

  2. Brush up on your manners.

  3. Smile often.

  4. Be gentle, sweet, and kind.

  5. Do not use abusive words.

  6. Do not speak bluntly.

  7. Be sensitive.

  8. Control your temper.

Man, what a waste of space. I can reduce those all to just one: be submissive, pliant, and pleasant to men. At least it’s not as long-winded as someone’s civility rules, even if it amounts to the same thing.

By the way, I hope something is done about the #WISCFI hashtag before the conference. Right now it’s just a flaming ground for trolling assholes.

85 comments

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  1. 1
    Brandon

    I think my girlfriend is “guilty” of not adhering to those other than having a temper, and that is what I love about her. Especially number 6.

  2. 2
    Numenaster

    And the crappy site it’s hosted on (Mag for Women? Really?) doesn’t take comments directly–it lets you post them to Facebook instead. So I left them this one: “The 50′s called, they want their advice column back.”

  3. 3
    lilandra

    About number 8 “control your temper”, I hate being shamed as a female for getting angry. Especially because my personality style is being quiet and reserving my emotions. Whenever, I finally do become angry, there is the implication that I am being unladylike or PMSing. And then it is shush your voice. I hate being shushed. I want to know what is a man’s excuse for barking, being blunt, and insensitive in casual situations? Are they shamed for it in most instances? Nope.

  4. 4
    PZ Myers

    Of course not. Because they’re being manly.

  5. 5
    Brandon

    I want to know what is a man’s excuse for barking, being blunt, and insensitive in casual situations? Are they shamed for it in most instances? Nope.

    Nope, we’re actively rewarded for it in many cases. Not to go all what about the menz, but it’s actually hard to not internalize the message that being a dick to people is “manly” and leadershippy and such.

    I think having a controlled temper is a generally positive attribute, but when it’s just used as an excuse to shut people up that are angry, it’s not a useful admonition.

  6. 6
    IslandBrewer

    What happened to walking at least 10 feet behind your man, always covering your hair, and not speaking until spoken to?

    What sort of liberal progressive is this nut?

    /SARCASM!

  7. 7
    glodson

    I was trying to think of a counter list for people who think this list is a good thing. Sadly, I only came up with this:

    1. Go fuck yourself.

    Not much of a list.

  8. 8
    mythbri

    I have worked to control my temper, not because I don’t think that I’m supposed to be angry, but because my anger unfortunately expresses itself through a red face and teary eyes, especially when I’m driven to anger through frustration. As you can imagine, this only makes things worse, because I come off as “emotional” instead of just angry.

    So I go distant and cold when I get angry, which works in professional situations but not so much in relationship situations. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t.

  9. 9
    Fern

    I was trying to think of a counter list for people who think this list is a good thing. Sadly, I only came up with this:

    1. Go fuck yourself.

    Not much of a list.

    Not much of a list, but it gets right to the point. I guess that would count as speaking bluntly, though, which is against the rules.

  10. 10
    lilandra

    Ironically, as woman you can’t win either way. If your are gentle, sweet, and kind, people can walk all over you. Even if you are just strongly opinionated and not necessarily angry, you’re a bitch.

  11. 11
    Matt Penfold

    I had a look at some other content on that magforwomen site.

    It has gems such as advice for being more informed about current affairs (read a newspaper, watch the news…) and how to stay together as a couple (talk to each other, cuddle ….)

    I’m not sure it is written by stupid people or written for stupid people.

  12. 12
    glodson

    Not much of a list, but it gets right to the point. I guess that would count as speaking bluntly, though, which is against the rules.

    But I’m one of those men people. I can speak bluntly and that’s cool because I’m all manly and stuff.

    I get to speak bluntly and it isn’t seen as bad because if the magic of man. Somehow. I’m not exactly sure how this is supposed to work.

  13. 13
    kemist, Dark Lord of the Sith

    Ah, so that’s what all that “being feminine” is all about.

    In that case, I have absolutely no desire to be “feminine”, and you can roll up your little list, wrap it up in poison ivy and stick it up where the sun doesn’t shine.

  14. 14
    karmacat

    Wow. Whoever wrote this is very sensitive and fragile. He can’t even able to handle bluntness? I guess, any criticism will cause his testicles to withdraw into his body and hide (assuming the author is a man)

  15. 15
    Ibis3, Let's burn some bridges

    “The 50′s called, they want their advice column back.”

    I did an undergrad thesis on instructions for family members in English sermons published in the 18th century. I’m pretty sure this advice column would be just as welcome in the 1750s.

  16. 16
    crocodoc

    4), 7), 8) are perfectly reasonable. Regardless of your gender, of course.

  17. 17
    ChristineRose

    This is one of the those content sites. Some barely literate person churns this stuff out and it sits there and props up ads. Refer to “Unpaid Writing Internship Opportunity perfect for English major.” Half the time it’s just aggregated by machine anyhow. (“Being feminine is important. There are many opinions about being feminine. Here is some expert advice about being feminine.”) They are going for search engines, not actual advice. Ironically PZ probably just made them a whole 35 cents or so.

  18. 18
    Yellow Thursday

    This is the same shit I’ve had to listen to all my life. “Be honest, but be polite.” “Stand up for yourself, but don’t get angry.” “Speak up, but don’t use naughty words or raise your voice.” “Understand why they’re angry, but don’t expect them to understand why you’re angry.” (That one’s mostly implied.) “Be honest, but tactful.” “Dress nice, but don’t worry about what other people think of your looks.” “You’re prettier when you smile,” but “you’re pretty no matter what other people say.” Fuck that.

  19. 19
    loopyj

    ‘Feminine’ (which I like to re-syllabify to rhyme with ‘asinine’) when applied to women is simply code for ‘attractive to men’ as in, ‘It’s amazing how that smart/talented/educated/skilled woman can do that thing (science/sport/politics/trades) while still retaining her femininity (i.e., her most important quality, her attractiveness to men, is still intact).’

    Pretty much every human culture has the patriarchal attitude, codified into religious doctrine, that women aren’t human beings in their own right but rather adjuncts to men and whose value is determined by their attractiveness and appeal to men.

    Fortunately, there are plenty of individual men who don’t want a docile, obedient fembot as either a partner or a friend and don’t regard women as accessories or property. Unfortunately, there aren’t quite enough of these men to go around.

  20. 20
    jojo

    Interesting, I cannot respond to that list of rules properly while also following the rules. I guess they consider that a feature, not a bug. Good thing I’ve never been much of a rule follower.

  21. 21
    Goodbye Enemy Janine

    Dress feminine.

    Please define. Are we allowed to wear shirts that end above the knee or should they come down to the ankles? Can we be sleeveless of do our arms need to be covered? Should we wear gloves? Do we need to wear a corset? Or a bustle? Or a hoop skirt? Do we need to cover our heads?

    Details dammit! We need it!

  22. 22
    lilandra

    Gentleness to anger is a spectrum. Gentleness works for both genders in many situations like handling a baby. The problem is when society expects a woman to inhabit just one end of the spectrum. It is unrealistic. I think the stereotypes in that list are often enforced in patriarchal societies to keep women docile. Gentle and docile are not perfect synonyms.

  23. 23
    SallyStrange

    Yeah, it’s a dumb site – but the interesting part to me is that someone who is camping out on the #WISCFI hashtag is propagating it. There are plenty of people out there claiming that sexism isn’t a problem in the skeptical movement, or, if it is, it’s not worse than any other group. And yet, here we have a group of dedicated trolls bothering people on the communication channel meant to exchange information about who’s going to Women in Secularism, what’s happening there, and so on, promoting blatantly sexist ideas.

    Are these trolls atheists and skeptics? Are imposters, posing as such in order to discredit the movement? Or perhaps they are atheists and skeptics but they are just doing this because they think it’s funny, and since the goal is funny and the promotion of sexist ideas is merely the byproduct of their attempts at humor, they can’t be held responsible for the sexism they’re spreading.

    Women in Secularism seems to be attracting a LOT of naysayers and trolls. Disproportionately more, it would seem than other conferences in the A/S movement (the acronym seems appropriate somehow). I suppose it’s just dissent – from the idea that women should even consider getting together to talk about their common experiences and promoting what’s in their interests. Which isn’t sexist at all, nosirree!

  24. 24
    otranreg

    Agree with #21: the list is ruddy VAGUE! Where are the numbers, the thresholds and the lists of what’s naughty and nice?!

    “Do not use abusive words”?

    You know, I myself would suggest this to a person who throws chinks, kikes and schwartzers left and right. But we all know what it really is supposed to mean: well, you often can’t get shit going without shooting a few fucks on the way, so, FUCK YOU.

    “Brush up on your manners.”

    What does this even mean? “Stop pissing on the altar?” “Stop picking other people’s noses?”

  25. 25
    marcoli

    Um, does anyone think that actually ALL of the points – well, not always #1 – should be goals for how EVERYONE should behave whenever possible?

  26. 26
    Worldtraveller

    So, Dan Fink can be succinct?

    I know, that was mean….

  27. 27
    lilandra

    I think gender roles and expectations in our society are messed up for both sexes. It is this artificial, male dominated structure that hurts both sexes. Although sexism still does hurt women more. That is why feminism benefits both women and men. For example my husband is kind of naturally manly, but he loves to cuddle every night before he goes to sleep. He has a gentle side that he doesn’t show in public. Why should we have these prescribed, unnatural roles that prohibit natural, human behavior?

  28. 28
    clastum3

    PZ’s got it all wrong again.

    It’s addressed to the men, and him in particular.

  29. 29
    dianne

    May I gently, sweetly, and kindly, without using any blunt or abusive words politely suggest that he place his advice so far up his rectum that it gets stuck in his cecum?

  30. 30
    Gregory Greenwood

    All pretty heinous, but no. 6 is particularly telling:- “Do not speak bluntly.” is clearly code for “don’t speak your mind”. Your standard misogynist whine that confident, self possessed women are just so awful for insisting on confronting sexist arseholes with their oh so inconvenient humanity and possession of their own minds.

    As for this fetishisation of ‘femininity’ – it simply fuinctions as a club to beat women with. ‘Feminine’, as defined by the bulk of society, is pretty much always synonomous with submissive, weak, seen-but-not-heard. It is used as a framing device that seeks to exclude women from public life and society’s levers of power, instead relegating them to those roles considered to be a lesser import by the pariachy.

  31. 31
    jojo

    Um, does anyone think that actually ALL of the points – well, not always #1 – should be goals for how EVERYONE should behave whenever possible?

    No. I will smile when I feel like smiling, and only then.

  32. 32
    glodson

    Um, does anyone think that actually ALL of the points – well, not always #1 – should be goals for how EVERYONE should behave whenever possible?

    Not really.

    Smile often? Why? If I don’t feel like smiling, why should I smile? Why should I put on a front? I’ll force a smile if I’m not feeling well and my daughter needs something. But that’s for her sake as she’s still a child.

    Be gentle, sweet, and kind? What does this mean? I rather be kind, but gentle and sweet? This sounds like a demand to be submissive and meek.

    Do not use abusive words? Fuck that.

    Do not speak bluntly? Why? Speak bluntly. Say what you have to say plainly. I don’t mean be tactless and thoughtless, but also don’t needless hide the tone as a means to protect others. Be blunt, honest and try to be tactful when needed.

    Be sensitive? Yea, but when taken with the rest of this, the idea is to be submissive. Don’t speak out.

    Control your temper? Of course. But this is an admonishment.

    These are bad blanket suggestions.

  33. 33
    Sastra

    Short version: “It’s better to be nice than right.”

    Sure, they’ll ignore you, walk all over you, and grab the conversation away from you and run somewhere else with it — but you’ll be liked. And it’s more peaceful and harmonious this way. Women like peace and harmony and being approved of. Sure they do.

    Although all the points have a bit of merit on their side (you can imagine the conversational disaster which might result if someone goes off full-tilt in a completely opposite direction), anyone who has tried to carry the unpopular side in a debate knows that you really can’t be gentle, sweet, and kind enough if you’re still saying things people don’t like. You can be Mr. Rogers on qualudes and they’ll still find something to bristle at: it’s not what you’re saying, it’s the WAY you’re saying it.

    No, probably not. Is is what you’re saying and they’re trying to shift focus. This list looks like a standard diversionary debate tactic aimed specifically at women. Color me surprised.

  34. 34
    Tony! The Fucking Queer Shoop!

    I know a few women who would defiantly stand (I would be at their side) in opposition to this list.
    ::wonders whimsically…
    Should you take it that the opposite advice for this column would be how to be manly?. If so, I flunk. Nor do I give two shits about living up to rigid gender roles imposed by society.

  35. 35
    David Marjanović

    No. I will smile when I feel like smiling, and only then.

    Bingo. What, do people expect me to lie!?!

    Similarly, speaking a bit more bluntly would make the world a much better place.

  36. 36
    Ichthyic

    Whoever wrote this is very sensitive and fragile.

    well, if the picture at the top of the actual article is anything to go by (it might not be, they might have just ripped it from a random flickr page), it was written by a 15 yr old girl.

  37. 37
    Ichthyic

    …that mag has another article on 5 steps to relieving stress.

    So I posted a comment in there asking them if these steps would help alleviate the stress resulting from following the advice in their column on being feminine.

  38. 38
    dianne

    This list sounds like the list of ways to be the perfect Southern lady. Southern ladies are famous for being deeply angry and contemptuous of men. Causal correlation is unproven.

  39. 39
    Pteryxx

    Women in Secularism seems to be attracting a LOT of naysayers and trolls. Disproportionately more, it would seem than other conferences in the A/S movement (the acronym seems appropriate somehow).

    IMHO that has a lot to do with the fundraising/visibility raising from a certain anti-feminist hero.

  40. 40
    Goodbye Enemy Janine

    Reminds me. I saw this bumper sticker yesterday. Not sure which I find more repellent; the sexism or the implied racism.

  41. 41
    Holms

    I find 5 to be especially hypocritical, given the usual shit thrown at the likes of Ophelia, Greta, Rebecca… wait, I should skip the list idea entirely and just say ‘any assertive woman’.

  42. 42
    kingbollock

    I told my wife about this list and she managed to break most of them in one, three word, sentence with “I’m fucked then.”.

  43. 43
    Goodbye Enemy Janine

    “Guys, don’t do that.” is the ultimate in abusive words.

  44. 44
    calliopejane

    What is the deal with some guys demanding that women smile?? You’re occupied with your own thoughts, and some TOTAL STRANGER busts in with, “Smile, it can’t be that bad” or “smile — I’m sure you look really pretty when you smile.”

    I do have typical responses. To the first, something really tragic: “not that bad? losing my only child to a drunk driver is ‘not that bad???’” (that gets me stuttering apologies, and a satisfying [to me] facial expression as they realize how fucking idiotic it is to tell a stranger how trivial her unknown-to-you problems must be). To the second, in a flat, disinterested tone, “I’m sorry I’m not decorative enough for your liking.” (which of course, makes me a bitch, but at least they leave me alone).

  45. 45
    SallyStrange

    I tried being nice to a guy who told me to smile one time. I was on the bus going home from work. I explained that I’d had a long day (working retail, Christmas season) and was tired. He said that if I lived in his home country, I’d never be tired because the men never let the women work.

    I told him that maybe if his country stopped excluding 50% of the population from the workforce, it wouldn’t be so economically depressed. He wanted to argue.

    Never again. I think I’ll adopt the “not decorative enough” line, but then, it hasn’t happened to me in a while. Hopefully I won’t have the occasion.

  46. 46
    Goodbye Enemy Janine

    My favorite was the cop who informed me that I should smile when I walked pass. I wanted to swear at the asshole but, let’s be honest, I was afraid of what he might do if I yelled.

  47. 47
    Nick Gotts

    clastum£@28

    How did you get to be such a shitheaded fuckwit? Was it innate, or did you have to take courses?

  48. 48
    HappiestSadist, Repellent Little Martyr

    Besides, though I am only a person read as female: I am controlling my temper. Or else I would tell many more people to perform an anatomically difficult act.

  49. 49
    Goodbye Enemy Janine

    Careful there, Happiestsadist. Tell a person to fuck themselves and a slymie will jump up and down, stomping their little booties, about a rape joke being told by a FtBullie.

  50. 50
    Holms

    Um, does anyone think that actually ALL of the points – well, not always #1 – should be goals for how EVERYONE should behave whenever possible?

    Not particularly. My individual responses:

    1 Dress feminine.
    I’m male, but fuck off anyway. Wear whatever you are comfortable wearing; anyone trying to tell you what your body ‘should’ look like is talking out of place, it is simply not their decision.

    2 Brush up on your manners.
    There are times for politeness, but times for other tones. Dealing with this shitty list, for example.

    3 Smile often.
    No. The basic idea with this one is to tell a woman that she must suppress herself, subordinating her true mood to that of ‘her man’ or whatever. Smile when the mood strikes, when it is genuine. Be upset, angry, whatever, when that is genuine. Express – rather than hide – yourself.

    4 Be gentle, sweet, and kind.
    When appropriate. Otherwise, this is basically the same as the smile one – being subservient.

    5 Do not use abusive words.
    Go fuck yourself!

    6 Do not speak bluntly.
    With a rake!

    7 Be sensitive.
    Another partial credit. Sensitivity is an awareness of those around you, and can be expected in return. Go ask Rebecca Watson if she is treated with sensitivity toward her mental well-being.

    8 Control your temper.
    This one actually is fairly decent, but applies to ALL people.

    In fact, that is the basic flaw here: there are elements of truth within this list, but only if applied evenly to goddamn EVERYONE.

  51. 51
    kevinkirkpatrick

    Wow, that is some magazine. Another article:

    6 Tips to be The Woman Every Man Craves For [sic]

    It’s not just beauty that men look for in women. Women need to have a perfect blend of looks and characteristics in order to be attractive and appealing.

    1. Dress up
    ….
    2. Listen more
    ….
    Women are known to be chatter boxes…Nag less and listen more… You don’t need to give advice or voice your opinion. Just listen.

    3. Be understanding

    4. Give space
    Men fear commitment because they are told over and over again that once they are into a relationship, their freedom will be a matter of the past.
    5. Communicate your needs
    …..
    6. Appreciate him
    ….
    Men are generous creatures, but they need to be appreciated too. Instead of complaining and nagging about everything he does not do, how about you appreciate him for every small thing he does?
    … Don’t stick to your point of view. Instead, look from the man’s angle and try to understand what he is going through. … Don’t let him feel guilty for his misgivings.

  52. 52
    hjhornbeck

    Slightly OT, but I just noticed something. One of the people trashing the Women in Secularism conference on Twitter is Justin Vacula. The same Justin Vacula who held a fundraiser to attend Women in Secularism.

    Huh?!

  53. 53
    ibbica

    To add a tidbit to what others have replied @marcoli #25…

    Holmes #50

    3 Smile often.
    No. The basic idea with this one is to tell a woman that she must suppress herself, subordinating her true mood to that of ‘her man’ or whatever. Smile when the mood strikes, when it is genuine. Be upset, angry, whatever, when that is genuine. Express – rather than hide – yourself.

    Well, at the risk of invoking the ‘evo-psych’ curse… I read it as even worse than that. Pretty sure that in most (all?) ape species, something very similar to “smiling” is a ‘submission’ signal.

    Completely unrelated, I’m sure.

  54. 54
    Dabu

    I read that as the author and likeminded trolls saying “Please don’t treat us in the way we deserve”.

  55. 55
    Ichthyic

    He said that if I lived in his home country, I’d never be tired because the men never let the women work.

    and so he came to your country because…?

    he’s an ambassador of misogyny?

  56. 56
    Worldtraveller

    9. Make me a sammich.

    Go big or go home, amiright?

    …don’t make me put a snark tag on this.

  57. 57
    Azkyroth Drinked the Grammar Too :)

    I want to know what is a man’s excuse for barking, being blunt, and insensitive in casual situations? Are they shamed for it in most instances? Nope.

    I fucking usually am (also “shushed”), but I seem to be an outlier.

  58. 58
    Ichthyic

    ok… I’m beginning to think this entire magazine is some robo-scripted crap that someone has running.

    there are no authors, and randomly picked photos to head everything.

    the articles are all in similar format…

    and the latest is:

    http://www.magforwomen.com/6-good-luck-symbols-to-drive-away-evil/

    good luck symbols to drive away evil??

    really??

    methinks I smell a NOT magazine…

  59. 59
    Ichthyic

    seriously, I don’t think anybody is actually WRITING these articles!

    I will bet money that there is a script that goes and collects public domain articles from old women’s magazines (that typically reprocess the same information repeated anyway), hashes them into lists associated with a specific topic, then randomly grabs pics from flickr accounts with the correct hashtags to fit the subject matter.

    If so, this is the first example of a robomagazine I have seen online, but it wouldn’t at all surprise me to discover they are common.

  60. 60
    SallyStrange

    and so he came to your country because…?

    he’s an ambassador of misogyny?

    He was a war refugee. So you can’t really hold that against him.

    But note, too, his assumption that not earning wages is equivalent to not working. I expect many Burundian women are plenty tired at the end of a day of childrearing and housework.

  61. 61
    Ichthyic

    He was a war refugee. So you can’t really hold that against him.

    I’m betting it wasn’t a war for equal rights, sadly.

    no, I don’t hold that against him.

  62. 62
    Markita Lynda—threadrupt

    As ever, the qualities suitable for a woman are suitable for a servant: look good, speak softly, and don’t challenge authority.

  63. 63
    xmaseveeve

    Thank you PZed. I love feminist men.

  64. 64
    Ichthyic

    sockpupetting troll cleanup request: aisle 62.

  65. 65
    Alexandra (née Audley)

    I’m sorry, but that list just sounds like some sad assed Nice Guy™, “beta male” whining about how women aren’t “demure” like they used to be.

  66. 66
    WMDKitty -- Survivor

    Pffffft. Fuck that. Sideways. With a wrought iron fence.

  67. 67
    lexie

    I was raised this way it sucks.
    .
    Ibbica #52

    Actually to my knowledge which is gained partly from animal behaviour courses at uni (I’m a vet student not a zoology student so these courses are less well fleshed out than they would be in zoology) and partly from a few friends I have who are very interested in wildlife and exotic medicine barring teeth is actually seen as an aggressive signal by most species including all other apes and most primates.

  68. 68
    ck

    seriously, I don’t think anybody is actually WRITING these articles!
    Perhaps, but these kinds of advice lists aren’t exactly uncommon in most modern women’s magazines. I’d bet that you could find one with a similar list with similarly lousy advice (perhaps even the exact same advice) in a supermarket today.

  69. 69
    ck

    Well, I fail at blockquoting. First line is supposed to be the quote, and the rest is mine.

  70. 70
    WMDKitty -- Survivor

    ck

    *cough*Cosmo*cough*

  71. 71
    ibbica

    66 lexie

    Actually to my knowledge… barring teeth is actually seen as an aggressive signal by most species including all other apes and most primates.

    Well yes, but showing teeth with lips relaxed – aka “smiling” – is quite a different facial expression in apes (as in humans) than “barring” teeth, which involves curling the lips back ;) (Er, I *may* have been a bit misleading by my qualifiers in that last comment…).

    59 Sally Strange

    …I expect many Burundian…

    Sorry, my brain stopped me from reading the rest of your comment after “Burundi” XD

  72. 72
    lexie

    Ibbica – that’s interesting, I hadn’t heard that, I’ve always been told never to show teeth at all when on zoo placements with apes but the vets and keepers could just be being over cautious (particularly when I am involved as unlike them I have virtually no experience with exotic species and also not a great deal of interest so it’s not something I spend my spare time reading up on). Even if it is a behaviour among apes, I don’t think that makes it a behaviour among most species (even though all species I know have happy behaviours they are not necessarily analogous to “smiling”) but I think that you recognised that in your comment #70.

  73. 73
    chigau (違う)

    I never control my temper or other emotions.
    I control my behaviour.

  74. 74
    yubal

    *Thought experiment*

    Ask the person who made the list (or anyone else) to come up with a list of behavior for men in secularism.

    Will the person be surprised what this list is supposedly good for?
    What would be on this list?

    Assume this list (for men) exists, could you simply transfer it to women or are there points that are appealing to women?

    Control: Use this present list and apply it to men in secularism.

    ( Doesn’t work for me. I would have problems with #3 and #8 assuming #1 doesn’t count, I dress like any good husband, my wife tells me what to wear and then I do it. If she is not there, I take the top pieces from the shelve and that also works fine.)

  75. 75
    michaelhofer

    #4
    “When a woman tries to behave like a human being, they say she wants to be a man”, Simone de Beauvoir, The Second Sex, 1949.

  76. 76
    crowepps

    I am boggled by the lack of logic behind “Make me a sammich.” Seriously, so you don’t want to listen to someone’s opinion, you want to treat them as having no more value than a household appliance, so you send them into the kitchen, where all the *poisons* are, to prepare food? Want a side of Valium overdose with that, or just a garnish of the traditional rat poison?

  77. 77
    Nicole Introvert

    I don’t know if it is doing any good, but as someone who will be attending WIS i have been trying to use the #WISCFI tag to get stoked about the event. Hopefully some other attendees will to and try to populate it with more support. Though is saying that breaking #6?

  78. 78
    Igor

    I think this is a great list that I would recommend to all men and women (minus the first point, of course). When did “being civil” become a disreputable attitude?

  79. 79
    jalyth

    @21 – You can dress in a sleeveless shirt unless you’re Michelle Obama, or similarly arm-ed. Also, probably not if you’re a little bit fat. Best to cover up as much as possible, except I’d assume cleavage.

  80. 80
    Ichthyic

    I’d bet that you could find one with a similar list with similarly lousy advice (perhaps even the exact same advice) in a supermarket today.

    indeed, the information has been recycled since the 50s.

    but at least in the case of a printed magazine, SOMEONE had to typeset it for printed publication.

    there is ONE email address associated with this online magazine, and it’s suspect… no author attributions at all, and I checked on some of the photo attributions, and the photographers swear they were never contacted to use their photos, and had nothing at all to do with the stories there were published in.

    so, yeah, I’m sticking to it here. I’m sure this is a Robozine.

  81. 81
    WMDKitty -- Survivor

    I’d bet that you could find one with a similar list with similarly lousy advice (perhaps even the exact same advice) in a supermarket today.

    *cough*Cosmo*cough*

  82. 82
    feralboy12

    9. Smell nice.
    10. Run cute.
    11. Make sure nothing squirts out of you during sex.

  83. 83
    Thumper: Who Presents Boxes Which Are Not Opened

    @feralboy12

    10- What does that mean?
    11- Why on earth not?

  84. 84
    David Marjanović

    Besides, though I am only a person read as female: I am controlling my temper. Or else I would tell many more people to perform an anatomically difficult act.

    Obligatory Hungarian lesson. And Slovak, and Czech.

    Actually to my knowledge… bar[...]ing teeth is actually seen as an aggressive signal by most species including all other apes and most primates.

    And it still works. There are smiles that make me aggressive.

  85. 85
    Markita Lynda—threadrupt

    …where all the *poison* are.

    As mother used to say, “A man has to sleep sometime–and with his eyes closed.”

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