Category Archive: Navelgazing

Feb 21 2014

Losing at Brain Games

[TW: ED] Small post today, because I’m feeling contemplative. I had something confirmed for me last week–that I have an unusual presentation and persistence of eating disorder/disordered eating* symptoms, given all the treatment, work, time I throw at it. In short, standard and adapted-for-me coping mechanisms and approaches for my anorexia tendencies (henceforth anorexia!brain) trigger …

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Jan 17 2014

A Week

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[The eating disorder content note on this post is so loud it tapdances in sequined tights. Skip the latter half if that seems bad for you.] It’s a Friday. 12:42 in the morning. And I’ve done something for the first time in seven years. I have fed myself properly for a week. Twenty-one meals in …

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Jan 02 2014

2013 14!

It’s January of 2014, officially that time of year where we decide to switch our calendars and spend two months forgetting we’ve done so. I don’t usually make New Year’s resolutions, but I do reflect on what the past year has brought me. In 2013 I…: – wrote quite a lot, got my own blog, …

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Nov 23 2013

In Which Scary Things Happened, Decisions Were Made, And I Didn’t Blog

SO. Dear readers. I have been really great about blogging Monday Miscellany link posts. Except for that time I posted on Tuesday last week. And when I haven’t done them. Okay, so I’ve been mediocre. But! There are reasons! 1) Big Life Changes. I’m increasingly sold on the idea of graduate school following this year. …

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Oct 29 2013

On Nail Polish and Pizza

After a bit of an unusual childhood/teenagerhood, I spent a lot of my senior year of high school and freshman year of college hacking away at a list of things I’d never had to learn that are rote to your average young adult. I’d never used a microwave before, for instance. (For the record, really …

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Oct 06 2013


This is the story of a girl who doubted herself. Who didn’t trust him at age six. Who compared him to a rattlesnake once. Who can still pull up the memory of that shocked face–the way she turned around in the car, while driving no less, and the look of horror when that eight year …

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Sep 10 2013

Intake Ramblings

The ramblings part of the title is veeeery accurate here! This is about my experience with intake and therapy and (1) I most certainly do not want to discourage you from seeking therapy if you have access to it! Intake may suck, but it is (usually) worth it. (2) I wrote this last night and …

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Sep 01 2013

In Which I Accidentally Test My Previous Post

Yesterday I posted about reducing a somatic symptom of anxiety. Today, I accidentally gashed myself with a knife and found myself quite panicky at the injury and blood and in the emergency room….retesting all that advice I was handing out*. Empiricism! However, this also serves as an announcement that blogging, if it occurs, will be …

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Aug 03 2013


Clearing out my drafts–from sometime in May, updated and edited. TW: ED for brief discussion of bingeing and depriving Better I’m sitting in the dark again. My bed is big and wide and green and it’s become my landing place. There’s a bowl on the desk to my left –the last remains of a meal …

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Jul 23 2013

Burning Out

Burning out is horrid. Burning out is not wanting to read the comments…or the piece. It’s sitting in front of your computer for hours, trying to write, and finally concluding that maybe it would be nicer to just put your pajamas back on and sleep. It’s when taking a walk around the block to clear …

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