The guy’s guide to feminism

 

I finally found the book. A small green book. A guide. A to Z guide to all things feminist. It is called ”The Guy’s Guide to Feminism.”

I just love the book.

If you do not like to read books on feminism  by women, fine. Then read this one, written by two guys, Michael Kaufman and Michael  Kimmel. It’s funny. Remarkable. Straight to the point explanation how and why feminism improves men’s life.

 

There are fascinating  pieces —

”Do you believe that women should have the right to:

  • Vote?
  • Go to college?
  • Drive a car?
  • Open bank accounts in their own names?
  • Enjoy sex?
  • Work in whatever occupation they might choose, and get paid the same as men when they do the same work?

Did you answer yes?

Then you better lie down. . . . You’ve probably caught feminism.

The feminist contagion has spread far and wide.  It infects both women and men.  Most people in North America, Europe and many parts of the rest of the world have caught it. The terrible truth is that, nowadays, most of us support these rights and actually see them as basic rights of individuals in a democracy.”

 

”It’s true.  As that Harvard professor observed way back in 1873, when women get more education, they do have fewer babies.

It’s not because their wombs shrink.

It’s because their options grow.”

 

 

 

 

 

”Does  feminism Virus Target  men? The virus really has it in for men.  doesn’t believe that male biology causes men to rape or pillage or not listen or hog the channel changer.  It actually believes that men are basically good!!!!   It believes that men can (and should) be ethical, emotionally present, and accountable to our values in our interactions with women — as well as with other men.

Women who’ve caught feminism not only expect men to act in honorable ways, but have a deep belief in our ability to do so.

Beware, my friend.  This is very insidious stuff.”

 

 

”A minister, a rabbi, and an imam were having coffee.

The imam said, “This sounds like the beginning of a bad joke.”

The minister said, “We’re all the children of Abraham.”

The rabbi said, “Yes, but which of his wives?”

The imam said, “Is that why feminists are so angry?”

The minister said, “What do you mean?”

The imam said, “They’re angry at us for several millennia of bad things that men have done.”

The minister said, “I like to tell my flock that women aren’t angry.  They’re just insistent.”

The rabbi said, “What’s so wrong about a little anger?  Imagine the world from their perspective.”

At that moment another friend, a Buddhist monk, arrived.  They told him what they were talking about.  The monk said, “See the world from women’s perspective?  Well, let me start:  How would you feel if every time you went out on a date, you worry you could join the one in four women who’d been sexually assaulted?”

The rabbi said, “Or what if there were people who wanted to make it illegal for you to have control over your own reproductive system?”

The imam said, “Or if you earned less for doing the same work as a man?”

The minister said, “If half the human race felt it was entitled to stare at your body or make comments about your breasts.

“And then, if you get angry, they accuse you of being a lesbian—”

“—as if that were a crime —”

“—or say how pretty you are when you’re angry.”

The four men thought about this for a moment.

“And it gets worse,” said the minister.  “Imagine that you start speaking out against these daily injustices and people start telling you to lighten up.  Stop taking things so seriously.  It’s only a joke.”

The rabbi said, “I wouldn’t just be angry.  I’d go ballistic.”

It was Friday, and the imam soon went off to Friday prayers.  “Anger,” he said to the worshippers, “is a rational response to injustice.  Anger can be a healthy emotion to feel, an expression that something is wrong.”

The next morning at Sabbath services, the rabbi said, “Anger can be a motivating force, an impulse to get up off your hiney and do something, to at least say this inequality is not okay.”

That afternoon, the monk said to those he had meditated with, “The problem isn’t anger, it’s finding appropriate ways to express it.  Perhaps only by expressing it, can we ever let it go.”

The next morning in his sermon, the minister told his congregants, “Anger can also be coupled with a desire to change things.  It can carry a belief that things can change for the better.  Resigned despair is what happens when you don’t think you can change things.  Anger can mean hope.”

On Monday, the four men got together again for coffee.  They were joined by another friend, a Hindu priest.

The priest said, “But you’re not saying that anger is the main thing that these feminists feel.”

Now, this coffee shop had a waiter who’d been serving perfect cups of coffee for years.  He’d heard the men talking the previous week and now heard this exchange.  He’d often had this very discussion about women’s anger with his girlfriend, so when the priest asked whether anger was the main thing feminists felt, he didn’t hesitate to jump in.

“Excuse me,” he said, “But when a woman feels angry, perhaps she is most angry that she has to feel anything but love and trust and how it feels to be an equal in the world.”

The minister, rabbi, imam, monk, and priest nodded sagely to each other.

And that is no joke.”

 

 

Cool.

By the way, not only I bought the book,  I bought a dozen of my male- friends the same T-shirts that says, “A Man of Quality Isn’t Threatened by Women’s Equality.”  They  love it.

 

 

Let’s Eroticize Equality

 

“Pornography is the theory, and rape is the practice.”  — Robin Morgan

 

I am against  pornography because it  has  many  harmful effects:   encouragement of  sex trafficking, desensitization, pedophilia, dehumanization, sexual exploitation, sexual dysfunction,  inability to maintain healthy sexual relationships. Pornography is exclusively for men’s pleasure. Women  are used as sex objects. I know some women will   say, ‘we love to be sex objects’. Millions of misogynists are out there to  support the idea of the objectification of women.  I do not have to support this.

 

I am against pornography, because I am against abuse or degradation. But I am not against erotica. The definitions of pornography and erotica come from Diana Russell.

Pornography: Material that combines sex and/or the exposure of genitals with abuse or degradation in a manner that appears to endorse, condone, or encourage such behavior.

Erotica: Sexually suggestive or arousing material that is free of sexism, racism, and homophobia, and respectful of all human beings and animals portrayed.

 

 

I like what  Gloria Steinem says, “Pornography is directly linked to sex trafficking. It normalizes degradation and violence as acceptable and even inevitable parts of sex, and it uses the bodies of real women and children as its raw material. The difference between pornography and erotica is clear in the words themselves — porne means female slaves, eros means love — and we can see that pornography, like rape, is about violence and domination, not sex. Millions of lives depend on our ability to untangle pornography from erotica, violence from sexuality.”

 

Researchers say,   “Most female performers are coerced into pornography, either by somebody else, or by an unfortunate set of circumstances.  Pornography leads to an increase in sexual violence against women through fostering  rape myths. Such rape myths include the belief that women really want to be raped and that they mean yes when they say no. Pornography desensitizes viewers to violence against women, and this leads to a progressive need to see more violence in order to become sexually aroused.”

 

“The pornography industry is a lot bigger, more powerful, more legitimate, more in everyone’s face today than it was a quarter of a century ago. To the degree that it cannot exist without doing real damage, it could still be stopped in its tracks anywhere by this  law. Sexual objectification and violation does not happen all by itself. Real social institutions drive it.”

 

“Pornography, an industry of woman-hating dehumanization,  is implicated in violence against women, both in its production  through the abuse of the women used to star in it , and in the social consequences of its consumption by encouraging men to eroticize the domination, humiliation, coercion and abuse of women.”

We should rather  Eroticize  Equality!

 

Survey says, “porn does not stimulate men’s appetites–it turns them off the real thing.  ‘Not tonight, honey, I am logging on’. Internet porn is everywhere, even ‘nice’ guys are hooked.”

A psychotherapist told us about  Myth and facts about pornography.   I find it quite interesting. Porn is fake, girls are real.

I believe Pornography and prostitution are not necessary evils, they are unnecessary crimes.

 

Look what you watch.  Porn1, Porn2, Porn3  ….. Do you want to watch more? Leave it. Let’s listen to  a song . Let’s change the world