Looks like we won’t have ol’ Jordan to kick around anymore


Jordan Peterson has been hospitalized with pneumonia and sepsis, which shouldn’t surprise anyone.

The psychologist, author, and bottomless fountain of tears is currently hospitalized and suffering from pneumonia and sepsis, as well as a spate of neurological issues that have apparently left him unable to regulate his emotions.

His daughter, Mikhaila Peterson, took to X to give the world an update on her father’s health, describing his recovery as “slow and scary”, and admitting “we’re not entirely sure what’s going on”.

The stated cause of Peterson’s ongoing neurological and physical deterioration is SIRS (systemic inflammatory response syndrome) caused by mold exposure. This is apparently the result of decades of living with mold, though it was recently exacerbated by exposure to an especially moldy environment.

Mold can be sneaky and dangerous, but he’s been a godawful mess for years — when he sprang on the scene, he was already deranged, and he’s only gotten worse. The stint in Russia in an induced coma probably didn’t help either.

Here’s hoping he recovers, but that someone realizes he is mentally unhealthy and should be spending the rest of his life quietly resting at home slurping his soup and shaking his fist at the TV.

His daughter thinks demons are involved, but this is a case where an undigested bit of beef might play a bigger role.

Comments

  1. says

    If there’s an alternate reality where he doesn’t listen to his daughter about anything health related, he’s probably a lot less sick in that reality.

  2. Ed Seedhouse says

    I am less generous, and at 81 my time left is fading fast. I’d so like him to die before me, so I can gloat. Not that I ever would, or could, do anything whatsoever to hasten his or anyone else’s end.

    Come to think of it it might be better for him to live and suffer for the evil he has done.

  3. Hemidactylus says

    So he’s been one of those clickers from The Last of Us all along? Mold ain’t no joke, though I guess I just made one, because…fuck him.

    Has anyone watched that obnoxious PF Jung who seems like a cloned lobster boy? Hard to imagine he was actually born with that last name. Weird stuff. Considers himself a dark centrist or some such. Hopefully he steered clear of the JP fungus among us though his brain seems infected with something. Memetic warfare he says. Bleck! JP has spawned many lobster boys. Clickers all.

  4. raven says

    There hasn’t been much in the way of good news this year so far.

    This at least made my day.

    Jordan Peterson deliberately tried to cause as much harm to as many people as possible.
    What goes around comes around.

  5. says

    The mold thing seems like an excuse to me. I’m going to go ahead and assume this is the long-term consequences of him frying his brain with black-market meds at that shady rehab in Russia.

  6. John Morales says

    First the fungoid brain, then the body. I mean, it explains so much!

    I wonder if he’s still on a pure carnivore diet.

    (Well, I don’t — he still lives)

  7. cheerfulcharlie says

    “Clean up your room” advises Jordan Peterson. Don’t live in a badly mold infested house. Don’t do drugs. Don’t eat a bad diet for years. Jordan Peterson is an incompetent guru.

  8. chrislawson says

    Like Adam Lee@7, I have some doubts. Mold exposure is one of those vague medical conditions of dubious empirical status that the alt-health industry loves to latch on to precisely because it is almost impossible to confirm or exclude. Having said that, molds and fungi can cause severe toxicity (e.g. aflatoxin, if eaten), and infections in the immune compromised. And SIRS is a described medical syndrome, although highly controversial as to its explanatory power over existing inflammatory syndromes. In short, we don’t really have enough info to draw any conclusions.

  9. Militant Agnostic says

    nomdeplume @12 and gijoel @13.

    If his dumbass daughter is the source of the mold diagnosis, we can be sure it is not mold. I saw pictures of the inside of his Toronto house when it was for sale. I doubt a house that fancy would have a mold problem.

    His mental and physical deterioration is due to him being full of shit.

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