Minnesota is slipping up


It’s the time of year when everyone is gearing up for the Minnesota State Fair, and one of the highlights has always been when the local newspapers write up the latest grisly, greasy, deep-fat-fried abominations that vendors will be selling there. I’d never eat the stuff, but the descriptions are always gruesomely entertaining.

But not this year.

The City Pages preview is out, and it is disappointing. These things look tasty and tasteful!

Snow Cap Mini Waffle Sundae: Mini waffle topped with a scoop of Izzy’s cream cheese ice cream, warm real maple syrup and a maraschino cherry.

At Hamline Church Dining Hall, located on the north side of Dan Patch Avenue between Underwood & Cooper streets

Stuffed Cabbage Roll: Cabbage leaves wrapped around seasoned ground pork and rice, prepared with tomato sauce and served with a dinner roll.

At iPierogi, located in the Food Building, south wall

Tipsy Pecan Tart: Pecan pie infused with Dubliner Irish Whiskey and baked in a buttery shortbread shell. Gluten-free.

At Sara’s Tipsy Pies, located in the Food Building, south wall

Turkish Pizza: A Turkish-style cracker-thin flatbread, authentically named Lahmacun, topped with spicy minced beef, onion, tomato, lettuce, cucumber salad, parsley, fresh herbs, a squeeze of lemon and garlic sauce, then rolled or folded.

At Blue Moon Dine-In Theater, located on the northeast corner of Carnes Avenue & Chambers Street

This has got to be some kind of satire, right?

Comments

  1. birgerjohansson says

    Obviously, the state fair has banned “CMOT Dibbler” from being a vendor this year.

  2. John Morales says

    One item per vendor has been selected as healthy, is how I see it.

    (What about the other items?)

  3. quotetheunquote says

    Agree, for “midway” food, this is all wrong; with the exception of the maraschino cherry, I would eat all of this happily.

  4. consciousness razor says

    Yeah, they don’t really have to say that there will be funnel cake.
    And I probably don’t have to say that There Will Be Funnel Cake doesn’t star Daniel Day-Lewis. But it should.

  5. says

    LOL Minnesota is turning into the new Portlandia. I’ve lived in Portland, OR for over a decade and you have no idea what’s headed your way. Your best bet is to just kick back and enjoy the ride. It only starts to suck when they start bulldozing your favorite dive bars, restaurants and concert venues to build condos.

    Actually, now that I think about it, once the heat from global warming kicks in, Minnesota starts to sound pretty appealing. Maybe I’ll retire there. Just kidding, I’m never going to get to retire.

  6. blf says

    Cream cheese ice cream? Sounds rather typical… perhaps not deep-fat-fried — albeit that is not certain — but definitely to be avoided. Even without the maraschino cherry.

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    I recently had a so-called “Lebanese Pizza”, which seems similar to the Turkish variety described, albeit this being France, the “spicy minced beef” wasn’t spicy. Fortunately, not deep-fat-fried, albeit who knows what happens in Minnesota…

  7. jrkrideau says

    Good to see the items reflect Minnisota’s Scandinavian heritage. Still, I imagine selling Lutte fish could be difficult.

    I was motivated to see what a funnel cake was. I had only heard of it one before. Looks okay.

  8. jrkrideau says

    @ 6 blf
    It looks like Minnesota follows the Scottish tradition of deep frying every thing. Deep fried Mars bar any one?

    Actually when I was in Scotland many years ago a lot of the food was very good.

  9. sirrod says

    Och aye the noo !—deep frried haggis !!—The Grreat McGonegal whull be prrood o’ ye !!!

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