…and when I looked up what the blood-sucking merchants of the world have declared to be traditional anniversary gifts, I notice that the 32nd anniversary is supposed to be commemorated with “molluscs”. At least, I think that’s what it said — what the hell do I care what the National Retail Jeweler Association thinks I’m supposed to get her? (And what’s with the 44th anniversary: I’m supposed to get her groceries?)
OK, anyway, as I was saying, molluscs for anniversary … I’m thinking this fabulous Valentina Ramos Octopus Bloom Duvet Cover is both romantic and titillating. What do you think?
(I now expect the phone to ring any moment and hear the words, “DON’T YOU DARE DECORATE MY HOUSE!” She knows that madness lies that way.)