There is a consolation prize!


He gets to live to enjoy his Darwin award!

Comments

  1. says

    There is a Bible passage where Jesus says, in Matthew 19:11-12, “There are some eunuchs who were born that way, and there are some who made themselves eunuchs for the sake of the kingdom of heaven. Anyone who can accept this should accept it.” Jesus also said, “If your right eye offend you, pluck it out . . . . If your right hand offend you, cut it off . . . . If your foot offend you, cut it off. If your family gets in the way, hate your father, hate your mother.”

  2. raindogzilla says

    What if someone else’s penis offends me? And will the emasculated Spaniard now join the Vienna Boys’ Choir?

  3. Russell says

    He’s not the first Christian to do this. Not by a couple of millennia. Origen, an early Church father, castrated himself.

  4. cyan says

    Means of satisfying urges gone, but urges still ever-present (he didn’t deball himself, which would have been the effective thing to do to prevent the urges): now there’s even more potential for even more violence to himself & others.

    Seems a basic understanding of the structural & functional causes of his urges might have had led him to different actions. But the babble provides no insight into those things.

    2000 year old babble: not the best guide to resolving problems.

  5. Just Al says

    Hmmmm. So, knowing it was a sin wasn’t enough. Willpower wasn’t enough. Even the threat of eternal hellfire didn’t stop the guy’s stiffies. Truly an intelligent design.

    I wonder if it ever occurred to him to simply get ordained as a catholic priest or a baptist televangelist?

  6. says

    Don’t you read your Bible? The Book of Roger, chapter 6, verses 1-28 say, “If when thou goest to the nudie bar, thy Pecker enlargeth and doth resembleth a Cypress log, thou shalt either smiteth thy Wanger with the thigh bone of a calf that was slaughtered on the Sabbath preceding a full moon; choppeth the offending Member completely from thy body with a bronze knife that has not tasted sweetbreads; or haveth a Wank for the Lord’s sake.

    I suspect many people take similar action when their brains begin to show life.

  7. G. Tingey says

    Trouble is …
    cutting off his penis U Ughhhh! DOES NOT castrate ….
    Cutting his TESTICLES off would have castrated him.

    ARRGGGHHH!

  8. Torbjörn Larsson, OM says

    So the upshot is that anyone with the balls to do this to himself will only do it once?

    Snip, tuck.

  9. Torbjörn Larsson, OM says

    So the upshot is that anyone with the balls to do this to himself will only do it once?

    Snip, tuck.

  10. Who Cares says

    He only gets an honorable mention seeing that he didn’t die or actually became sterile (removing the balls would have given him a shot at an award).
    [/pendantic]

  11. Molly, NYC says

    From the news article: There was also a suggestion he may be suffering from psychological problems.

    Ya think?

  12. Wes says

    Hmmmm…

    There was a Jerry Springer episode not long back in which a guest claimed to have done precisely the same thing to himself, and for exactly the same reason.

    Also, no victim, no doctor, no spokesman, nobody is named. Just the city and the hospital. Not naming the man himself might be excused, but not naming whoever spoke for the hospital…why? The story is greatly lacking in specifics.

    I wouldn’t be surprised if this were nothing but an urban legend.

  13. Brian says

    Before drawing any conclusions as to the urban-legend likelihood of these stories, consider this quote from an essay by David Foster Wallace:

    “The American Academy of Emergency Medicine confirms it: Each year, between one and two dozen adult US males are admitted to ERs after having castrated themselves. […] surviving patients most often report that their sexual urges had become a source of intolerable conflict and anxiety.”