A “fruity” personal anecdote


Sometimes I worry that those of you who know me exclusively from the blog (who don’t, for example, follow me on Twitter – a medium on which I am exceedingly silly) think of me as a very serious, somber person. I try to balance my natural inclination toward jokes and frivolity with the fact that many of the topics I discuss here deserve a mature discussion. While I do my best to maintain a kind of balance, I am never sure how successful I am.

If you are interested in getting a better understanding of who I am outside the blog, I am going to relate an anecdote from my personal life. I keep a bowl of fruit on my desk at work because I get hungry and it helps break up the day. My favourite fruits are apples and bananas. Because I am a ridiculous creature of habit, I always have a banana in the morning and an apple in the afternoon (it’s nothing at all like OCD; it’s just a thing I do because I am borg and fear change). Usually I go shopping on a Monday and buy exactly enough of each to last me through ’til Friday.

What this means is that on Thursday afternoon there is always 1 banana and 2 apples in my fruit bowl. And every Thursday afternoon I position the apples on either side of the banana and LAUGH MY ASS OFF.

This is who I am. I am a giant 6 year-old making cock-‘n’-ball sculptures out of my food.

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Comments

  1. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    I heart you, Crommie. I’m inordinately amused by juvenile potty humor myself.

  2. Luna_the_cat says

    A co-worker of mine recently made a similar “sculpture” with a banana and two tangerines at his desk.

    He caught me looking at it, and after an initial proud grin, suddenly got concerned and asked me if I found it offensive.

    I told him it didn’t bother me any, I just appreciated the fact that he was the one who was going to eat it.

    Got a good laugh from that.

  3. Dave, the Kwisatz Haderach says

    Awesomesauce. Sometimes I look around and I think that people are going to notice that I’m a kid in an adult costume and call me out on it. Good to know there are other 6-yr olds in disguise out there.

  4. says

    Ha! Awesome!
    Meanwhile, I have a tendency to move pepperpots around the table in restaurants while muttering Dalek sounds. Exterminate! Exterminate!

    Awesomesauce. Sometimes I look around and I think that people are going to notice that I’m a kid in an adult costume and call me out on it. Good to know there are other 6-yr olds in disguise out there

    I feel like that all the time. Never quite got the hang of ‘being an adult’.

  5. Tyrant of Skepsis says

    I also suffer from terrible “adult world impostor syndrome” if you know what I mean. Whenever I look at myself I think “and I’m supposed to be a grown-up? You have to be kidding me…”. Then I realize that most other people aren’t any better, just maybe better at hiding it, for example because they don’t put all the chocolate bunnies in mating position every easter whenever noone is looking.

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