Every time. Jesus, this pandemic will never end.

Once again, we get to suffer with shortsighted thinking. I just got this memo from the president of my university.

Trends in COVID-19 transmission statewide continue to show significant decreases, both in terms of current data related to case numbers, positivity rates, and available hospital beds, but also in forecasts predicting continued declines. Given those trends, the University is lifting the temporary, systemwide policy that mandated all events with over 200 attendees require individuals to show proof of vaccination or a negative COVID test. From February 10 on, proof of negative test or vaccination status is no longer required.

Masks remain required for all indoor facilities across the system. They are an effective tool for preventing the transmission of COVID-19 as well as influenza. We continue to monitor state and federal guidance and will update you as additional decisions are made.

Attendance at football games must have been down.

Here we go again. The precautions are working! So let’s stop taking them!


  1. brucej says

    University President: “We would like to announce the good news that this new ‘Parachute’ has worked miracles, greatly reducing our falling rate.. ”

    [person wearing ‘Parachutes Don’t Work! I have an Immune System’ tee-shirt plummets by at terminal velocity, screaming “Take off your slave ‘chutes!”]

    “..and now that we’ve safely reached 400 feet above the ground, we feel the time is right for all to take ours off, we are clearly moving slowly enough to land without injury!”

    [triumphantly removes his parachute, immediately plummets to a gruesome death, as another person person flies down at terminal velocity “Seee parachutes don’t woooorrrkkkk” SPLAT]

  2. wzrd1 says

    So, the wildfires are under control, so we’re going to resume spraying the weeds with gasoline. The careless smokers in the area will help us keep things under control quite efficiently.

  3. raven says

    Every time. Jesus, this pandemic will never end.

    Every time before, when the USA has done this, cases of Covid-19 virus start going up sooner or later.

    Who knows when this pandemic will end anyway? I’m sure Omicron isn’t the last variant. Already, the progeny variant Omicron BA.2 is taking over.

    The timing isn’t all that great. The federal government was supposed to distribute free home tests to everyone. Most haven’t got them
    They were also supposed to hand out free K95 masks to everyone. That hasn’t happened either.
    There are now two new approved antivirals, Paxlovid and molnupiravir from Merck and Pfizer, that are potentially very useful in controlling the pandemic. They aren’t yet widely available either.

  4. says

    The precautions are working! So let’s stop taking them!

    Two months or so later: “OMG it’s another COVID surge! So let’s go back to all those precautions!”

    To which the anti-vax crowd would surely reply: “Nothing you say works, you people can’t make up your minds, none of you know what you’re doing, you all just wanna take away my FREEDUMB!!!”

  5. asclepias says

    The schools here removed the mask mandate after Christmas break, and the headline in Sunday’s paper was that district cases had increased by 400. They must be having trouble understanding cause and effect. Then again, I can’t expect too much because our governor recently appointed a superintendent (the person doing the job before took a job in West Virginia) with no ties to the educational community here and very little experience in the field. (As someone who has been filling out applications for years, has lots of experience, and is generally qualified for positions, but still has no job, I am offended.)

  6. Ed Seedhouse says

    I feel so much better since I stopped hitting myself in the face. So I’ll start hitting myself in the face again. What could possibly go wrong?

  7. Rich Woods says

    This morning I was the only person in the supermarket wearing a mask, including the staff. To be fair, when I went on Saturday morning the only other person wearing a mask was the security guard, whom they can only afford to employ on Friday evenings and at weekends, and who must get sick and tired of reminding people that published shop policy is still to ask people to wear masks only to have drunks and imbeciles cough in his face. But Boris has decreed that all restrictions will be lifted by the end of the month, so that’s all right then. It’s not like there’s ever been a surge in cases in the past when restrictions have been relaxed.

    I’ve got to go to the hospital on Friday, where most people are still wearing masks. At my last appointment a few weeks ago there were more outpatients not wearing masks than at the previous appointment, but none of the staff were picking them up on it. I didn’t feel like starting a fight with some selfish pillock either, not when I already had one arm in a sling.

  8. says

    Funny how officials consistently jumping at the chance to relax mandates doesn’t make a dent in the rightwing narrative that the restrictions are steps on the road to totalitarianism.

  9. Walter Solomon says

    Thanks to the Gumby and gopher, I’m both laughing and crying at this post. This is fitting. The last two years have been both the saddest and most absurd in my lifetime.

    If you were under any delusions that humans were rational, these couple of years should have disabused you of such beliefs.

  10. dianne says

    What we’re doing now is the public health equivalent of quitting a 10 day course of antibiotics after 5 days because you’re feeling better. The consequences are inevitable.

    If you want your free COVID test kits, go here and enter your info. (I did and got the kits about a week later.)


  11. whheydt says

    Re: dianne @ #11…
    Mine arrived today. There is the minor problem that the kits are per physical address, not per logical household.

  12. vereverum says

    “Attendance at football games must have been down.”

    Thats a pretty snide remark.
    You as an educated person should know it’s because the chemtrails arent working.
    Now get with the program.

  13. PaulBC says

    You as an educated person should know it’s because the chemtrails arent working.

    True story. I was waiting in traffic yesterday for a free COVID home test distribution (of course they ran out before I got there). Anyway, there was a helicopter overhead. I couldn’t tell it if was related in any way. I don’t see how it would be, but I’m sure the “black helicopter” nuts could have a field day over that.

  14. davidc1 says

    @14 Your days are numbered, bill solid gold gates is atracking you through his vaccine you let THEM stick in your body.
    Your only hope is to sign all your goods and money and chattels and money(you said money twice,I like money)over to someone while you go off grid and head for the vast forests of the Pacific North West.
    Believe me it is the only way to throw THEM off your trail.
    I would be willing to be the one who you sign over you stuff to,once the heat has died down and THEM
    have given up looking for you,I will contact you and let you know when it is safe to return to my house.
    Sorry, your house.I am you only hope.