Anyone want a cat?

I’ve got one I could spare.

I had a suggestion to help with her general pukiness — to provide her with a puzzle feeder to giver something to do. So I did. How did she react? She puked all over it. When I discovered that, I just left and went for a long walk around town.

When I got back, she’d left me a colossal wad of slimy puke in the middle of the kitchen floor.

First come, first served, she’s yours.


  1. Debbie Bridygham says

    Your cat may be allergic to the food it’s eating, a hypoallergenic diet or steroid injections may help. One of my cats gets a steroid injection every 4 to 6 weeks, it helps.

  2. ramirofernandez says

    Our cat was pukey. Turned out to be lymphoma and hyperthyroidism. On a steady diet of drugs now and she’s feeling much better.

    Sounds like your cat may be seriously sick. Is she losing weight as well? If she’s seriously sick and you won’t take her to the vet to get diagnosed, she may be living in constant pain that you will never know about.

  3. blf says

    The mildly deranged penguin suggests she’s heard of rocket propulsion, but hasn’t quite grasped the forces involved to make puke propulsion work — but check for cat-sized / -shaped holes (or dents) in the ceiling.

  4. robertlfoster says

    We had three cats, two girls and a boy. The girll cats were lovely. One of them, Gracie, died of lymphoma on our bed two weeks ago. I buried her in the backyard flower bed. The second, named Garbo, also has intestinal cancer and we’re giving her 150ml of Ringer’s daily as well as steroids and an antiemetic. She may last another month. The boy, Sammy, is 11.5 years old, sounds a lot like your cat. But he doesn’t puke, he pisses out of the box. The vet surmises it’s territorial behavior because it’s always worse when we have people staying over (visualize pissed on sweaters, shoes, pillows, bedspreads, and carpets.) We had him on Prozac for a while and that helped a great deal, but he suddenly said fuck this and stopped taking his pills. Forcing pills into him is out of the question. I value my eyesight and my good looks. Things got so bad that we had all of our carpets removed and replaced with vinyl plank flooring. Now when he goes rogue the cleanup is a snap. But it still makes my blood boil. You may ask, why do we keep him? That’s a question I’ve asked my wife countless times. The answer comes down to conscience. Taking him to the shelter is as good as a death sentence. We’ve had him since he was kitten and despite the misery he inflicts upon us, he’s still part of the pride. But soon he’ll be the only cat left. What happens then? I have no fucking idea.

    I share this with you to let you know things could be much worse.

  5. mmason0071 says

    I know this is a difficult situation with the lockdowns and a semi-feral animal, but you have a very sick cat. Blog posts are not going to help.

  6. hemidactylus says

    No thanks. Though she loves barking at 2-4am I have a very sweet dog. Not messing my life up with a pukey cat.

    My dog had odd barfing spells when she was younger but plain yogurt seemed to do the trick. Not sure what cures barking.

    She’s probably craving her beloved Paul Newman fix. Not going to be her late night treat dealer. She’ll be pawning my TV and CD collection for treats soon.

  7. TGAP Dad says

    I’ve had cats with various living arrangements (indoor, outdoor, transient…) for 50 years, and I’ve only seen this happen with three things: hairballs, foreign object obstructions, and tumors. One foreign object was a $2500 packing peanut.

  8. Becky Smith says

    Oh dear, not fun for you or the cat. We’re now down to two cats after losing the oldest of our three old ladies in December. Amazing what we’ll put up with for our pets. Tesla, named by her previous teenage human after the heavy metal rock band and abandoned by the same family during the 2008 financial crisis, two years ago develop hyperthyroidism. Long story short-after a year of trying to figure out what was going on and treating it with impossible to administer meds, Tesla was finally cured after radioactive iodine treatments at University of Georgia Vet School. Let’s just say it was a very expensive week at the vet school, but so worth it! She’s a much more mellow cat and no more trying to administer medication to a very strong and resistant cat. Typsie, aptly named by the shelter she was adopted from, was prescribed what I think is voodoo medicine for an inoperable sinus cancer by a wonderful holistic vet. I have to order this “medicine” from Utah, and the vet told me if it worked, I’d have to keep dosing her for life. I only order two bottles at first, because I was sure she wouldn’t last six month—and that was seven years ago, and I’m still dosing her twice daily! HA! It’s crazy! Hang in there. My thoughts are with you.

  9. unclefrogy says

    I do not like to focus on the cost of pets but I am forced to because of “budget constraints”
    Cats in my neighborhood are not very difficult or expensive to obtained I can attest as I myself have adopted by last count “7” alley cats (for want of another name). he tomcat who comes inside a lot was once going to be an inside cat (when he was a kitten) but his inability to reliably find the f’n cat box every time convinced me he wanted to be an outside cat. he still misses the box sometimes by mills other times by yards but mostly comes and goes. He does not get into many fights any more I guess he is no longer in the competition so no weeks of nursing his battle injuries now he just does the tom cat thing of laying around and sleeping and eating. I can not afford the expense of a vet they charge way more then I can afford especially for an animal that is so easy to acquire so food, water and shelter is what I give them for dead birds and shit on the floor.

    maybe that “daemon cat” wants to be an outside cat and an outside en-closer would be something you could try.
    uncle frogy

  10. robro says

    My sympathies for you, PZ. We’ve had cats…5 at one time. I find cats difficult, particularly when they start pissing on things. There’s no way to effectively clean the smell. We’ve also had dogs, including recently a couple of “fosters” from Guide Dogs fo the Blind, which is near us. We are happily pet free at the moment. I would keep it that way, myself, but my family likes dogs. So probably another dog in my future.

  11. kestrel says

    I am so sorry. I know you have struggled really hard to help this cat. It sounds like you’ve done everything possible. Sometimes, there’s just nothing that can be done. I’m sure it’s complete misery for both of you. I’m sorry that all I can offer is sympathy.

  12. John Morales says

    I have to concur; such spewishness ain’t normal for cats. Something is up.

  13. Betsy McCall says

    Please take the cat to a vet. The cat is sick. The cat needs a doctor… as you would if you were puking that much.

  14. bobobo says

    Go to the vet and try some special cat food. Also does your cat drink a lot if water, could be kidney failure. The vet will probably want a urine sample, which is fun to get from a cat.

    My cat was doing thie exact same a few years ago. We’ve got him on medicine to manage the kidney failure and he’s been much better.

  15. says

    It going to be hard to find such an animal a new home. And given the probability of medical issues, I’m not even convinced it’s the right choice. I assume you have tried the vet and all the other obvious things…

    I hope this hasn’t turned you off cats completely, without medical/behavioral issues they can be charming companions. Something like a Main Coon (or Norwegian Forest Cat) would be my recommendation. They’re large, furry and good-tempered (just like you).

  16. says

    Take it to the vet and hope it’s furballs. Either that or it’s overeating and throwing up what it can’t hold down.

  17. stroppy says

    Prolonged vomiting can itself cause problems with the digestive tract. I should say it’s not just hairballs. Vets pull all kinds of things out of cats, especially strings and string like things.

    If getting her to the vets is a problem, call them and ask for advice/prescription. Possibly pill her with a sedative first? She may throw a hissy fit, but a towel, and a pill popper thingie will do it–maybe some gloves too. With a little skill, you can can be in and out slick as a whistle. Biting the bullet short term may save you months of torment.

    Come on. You’re a bio guy, I thought smelly, gooey, bitey things were your stock and trade…

  18. maireaine46 says

    Talk to Mary about this. It is her cat too. She will be home next week? I would say a visit to the vet is in order, as have many other people. I am sorry to hear what a hard time you have had with your kitty, and how good you were to give her a home with all her issues. We just adopted two older shelter cats, as our last beautiful gentle kitty passed away at age almost 20 of kidney failure. The new cats are skittish, hide a lot, not the same. We have had a little barfing but nothing like you have described. I have had cats all my life, and they are all different. I hope this can be resolved and am so happy for you to hear that Mary is coming home.

  19. sherylyoung says

    PLEASE take your cat to the vet. Cats are not disposable pets, they are not paper plates. Please don’t be a narcissistic ass who thinks he knows it all. If you won’t take your cat to the vet, I will. I will drive from Basalt, Colorado to Morris, Minnesota and bring your cat here and take him to my vet.Surely someone in town will point me to your home.

    I’ve looked up to you for a long time, please don’t be inhumane!

  20. magistramarla says

    Erland Meyer @ 22
    My husband has a 15 year old Maine Coon named Dax. He’s poly-dactyl and with 7 claws on each front foot, he has thumbs, which he uses. He’s the sweetest, most loyal pet anyone could ask for!

  21. pilgham says

    Another vote for a vet visit. Our vet has curbside service, they carry them in and carry them out. Wrap the cat in a towel, stick her in a carrier and get her over there.

  22. says

    I will take her. Have devoted a large part of my life to the critters and have had many a barfing cat am also a former surgical vet tech. If you can wait until after spring quarter ( I am also a prof) will drive out and get her.