Technology is trying to kill me now


These new health features in the Apple Watch are tempting.

I would worry that the false positive rate is going to be sky high, but on the other hand, I’m getting older, have a family history of heart problems, and had my own cardiac scare several years ago. Maybe this would be a good thing to look into.

How much do these Apple Watches cost, anyway? (quickly checks apple.com to answer my own question.)

GAAAAAAH! $400!

(Strokes out. Goes into v-fib. Collapses. Heart explodes. Dies.)

Nope, sorry, the budget isn’t going to be able to cope with this at all.

Comments

  1. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    I’m not an early adapter either. My theory is always wait 6-12 months to how the technology performs in the real world. Which is why I shredded the early credit cards with RFI, while using the latest version due to the much, much shorter range.
    Same for all these health diagnoses.

  2. weylguy says

    I guess that also means you won’t be plunking down $1,199 for the new iPhone. What are you, Myers, some kind of Luddite?

  3. John Morales says

    I’ve got a great paperweight. Does the job, no worries.

    (Some might call it a desktop computer, but it surely is a great paperweight, much like the Apple watch is a watch and an iPhone is a telephone)

  4. stumble says

    Do you have life insurance? A number of them have started to hand out Apple watches at heavily discounted prices (around $25).

  5. John Morales says

    stumble, life insurance companies are profit-driven.

    So… if (assuming weylguy is around the mark) they are offering expensive products at a nominal price, be assured that ostensible largesse comes out of their members’ fees, and that they profit thereby.

  6. sparks says

    And add that ‘for profit’ organizations don’t do anything (intentionally) that they do not expect to make a … profit.

  7. John Morales says

    sparks, well, yes.

    But there’s this concept called ‘arbitrage’, so that though may be a disparity in the magnitude of profit, it is not necessarily a zero-sum outcome.

    (It’s complicated)

  8. aziraphale says

    Wake me up when it can measure my blood sugar without needing to puncture me. I might be interested.

  9. AussieMike says

    @7: Early detection of a possibly very expensive condition means retained profits. Hence, in insurance company terms, it’s cheap insurance on their part to offer it.

    I have a friend who mountain bikes. He is around 52 years. Came home one afternoon after a ride feeling “god awful”.
    Couldn’t get well after laying down for a few hours, nothing worked. He forgot his Apple Watch was recording his heart rate so upon checking it he noticed his heart beat was shockingly all over the shop. Straight to hospital he went. He needed Cardioversion shock treatment to recover from Arterial Fibrillation and ongoing monitoring for other possible conditions.
    The watch price was a good deal in the end.

    The new Apple watch also records falls etc so there is a lot in it’s favour. I’d encourage you to get one. I’d even put into a GO FUND ME page to hep you. You can then do a PZ review some time down the track. Hell, it may even save your life, who knows.

  10. John Morales says

    AussieMike:

    The new Apple watch also records falls etc so there is a lot in it’s favour.

    Sure. If you have nobody with whom you cohabit, there’s a lot in its favour.

    One thing I know: whatever Apple now offers, others either offer or will offer similar functionality, but cheaper.

  11. John Morales says

    [finally, I am somewhat bemused that people accept such monitoring, as if it were not obtrusive.

    But hey, what’s really the prob with a corporation knowing where you are, having the ability to listen in you, and being aware of whether you fall?]

  12. chris61 says

    @15
    A significant fraction of seniors (who are the folks most prone to falls from which they can’t get up) live alone. So I’m with AussieMike – detecting falls is a big plus.

Leave a Reply