“uncomfortable by my presence” »« You have disappointed me, New Zealand

I want one

It’s Apple, it’s cool, my wallet is already half out of my pocket.


IMPORTANT: Hey, how about watching the video before commenting? It’s not what you think. Damn kneejerk Apple haters.

Comments

  1. Woo_Monster, Sniffer of Starfarts says

    Wow, very impressive! Those eye-fones just keep getting better and better! Thanks for the tip, PZ!

  2. deee says

    Well sure, if you want to pay for an overpriced toy, and support a patent troll company who thinks they know what you should be able to do with your hardware better than you… then go for iphone. Those of us who appreciate our freedom more than being “fashionable” are using android.

    Really, being a mac user is in many regards similar to religion…

  3. madtom1999 says

    Wow it one of those things that can do what a computer can do! For 3 times the price!

  4. =8)-DX says

    Finally! Apple has reinvented the digital camera! Guess that’s lightsout to people like Olympus and Canon.

  5. Eric O says

    Ugh, why did I have to read the comments on YouTube?

    Someone is actually blaming feminism for the shallow culture that this skit is joking about.

  6. TonyJ says

    Loved it. Especially this: “within minutes, people were telling me how much fun I was having!”

  7. newfie says

    What about those of us who only use their iPhones for playing Words With Friends on the terlit?

  8. ogremeister says

    So does it do video, too? And can you stream that video live? And what would happen if you pointed one at a monitor showing that stream?

  9. timberwoof says

    It’s a rebadged and simplified Canon EOS 5D! At least they have good taste in who they partner with.

  10. andyo says

    It’s a rebadged and simplified Canon EOS 5D!

    Except Apple clearly will have invented it.

  11. says

    “LEAKED” har har lol. It is so disappointed that everyone falls for this stupid viral marketing.

    Yes sure, Android is as much of a patent troll as apple. Also, atheism is as much of a religion as Mormonism.

    But hey, this thing clearly has rounded corners and we all know that no one would ever, ever think of that before apple did. We owe them to this unnovation.

  12. carlie says

    Except Apple clearly will have invented it.

    And will sue the bejeezus out of Canon for violating their patent.

  13. Woo_Monster, Sniffer of Starfarts says

    “LEAKED” har har lol. It is so disappointed that everyone falls for this stupid viral marketing.

    Bullshit. That ad was real.

  14. says

    Really, being a mac user is in many regards similar to religion…

    Knee-jerk regurgitation of tired talking points and promoting one’s own subjective preference to universal truth, of course, isn’t.

  15. Beatrice says

    I read the comments before watching the video -> confused.

    Now that I’ve seen it….

    Brilliant.

  16. Rip Steakface says

    Devoted Apple hater here – watch the damn video, people. Look past the title. They’re mocking Apple, in case you didn’t notice.

  17. TonyJ says

    It’s a rebadged and simplified Canon EOS 5D! At least they have good taste in who they partner with.

    If I could get a Canon 5D for the price of an iPhone, I’d be all over that. I want 64,000 ISO!

  18. says

    This is pretty hilarious, just let me offer one little bit of warning.

    If you see anything else about leaked iPhone 5 information. Like an e-mail or a Facebook message or anything else like that: DO NOT CLICK ON IT.

    There is a spam campaign going around that takes advantage of a Flash vulnerability, and can infect your computer with malware. So be careful what you click on!

  19. a3kr0n says

    It’s Apple, it’s closed, and if you try to do anything with it we’ll sue you.
    It’s Linux, it’s open, and we encourage you to modify and improve it.
    So what? I’m an open source dude!

  20. Rev. BigDumbChimp says

    IMPORTANT: Hey, how about watching the video before commenting? It’s not what you think. Damn kneejerk Apple haters.

    And here I was enjoying them making an ass out of themselves.

    Way to ruin it squid boy.

  21. says

    People talk about creepy Mac cultists that wont shut up about their platform of choice, but yet whenever Apple is mentioned anywhere, there’s a 10-1 ratio of haters spouting off before even paying attention to the post in question. Madness.

  22. insipidmoniker says

    I like my iPad. I also like my Galaxy S3. Does this make me an accomadationist?

  23. says

    I like my macbook pro, my android phone, my linux server and I want the Microsoft Surface. I personally cannot wait for the Canon 5D… um iPhone 6/5. Good video :)

    All the tech companies are borderline evil, so I refuse to give any brand loyalty. Give an entity built around making money with no accountability and give them a broken legal system to abuse what do you think happens?

  24. says

    Vexorian:

    Spoken like one of the mouthbreathing racist assholes at ESR’s blog. How about you go to folklore.org and look up roundrects?

  25. Loqi says

    Damn you, Poe’s Law! Why must you prevent me from determining whether this is serious or not?!

  26. AlanMac says

    All I want is a phone that doesn’t make people sound like they are phoning from the Andromeda Galaxy in a 1950s sci-fi movie.

  27. says

    Soon enough, Apple will be suing Canon and Polaroid for violating apples patent on “a circular lens”, and claiming that other camera manufacturers “slavishly copied” Apple’s Original™ idea for a digital camera.

    Also: FFS fellow apple haters, can we stop using the “Apple is a religion” line on everything Apple? Save that for actual instances of cultish behavior, like iPhone campouts. >_>

  28. says

    eliasfox:

    Indeed. I think it’s actually endemic to a certain sector of the open source community, and the utterly deranged Android fanbois are part of it. Typical case of turning a moral stand into a superiority complex.

  29. flyv65 says

    Funny bit-but I still look forward to the iPhone release September 12th. I fail to get the raging Android fanboi animosity toward Apple-is it because there are people out there who don’t care what your opinion is? It sure seems like there are a lot more knee-jerk haters these days than there are knee-jerk buyers…

  30. andrewcampbell says

    I’m a Blackberry user. Awesome phone and RIM isn’t nearly profitable enough to be evil. I win, Muhahahahahaha.

  31. says

    flyv65:

    It’s easier to understand than you’d think. Android is based on Linux. (Yes, there’s a lot more to it — the Harmony library and the Dalvik VM — but the Linux part is important.) There was a .sig I saw when Mac OS X first came out on Usenet: “Apple has finally separated Unix users into people who use it because they like the technology and people who use it because it lets them feel superior.” The sector of embarrassingly rabid Android fanbois that we’re talking about are part of the latter category, doubly so because there’s an explicit moral imperative in the free/open source software movement. When you get moral imperatives involved, you get all kinds of fanatics along with it, and that’s what’s going on here. (Interestingly, you’d be surprised how many people are utterly ignorant of the technical details of the Mac platform — the one-button mouse thing hasn’t been strictly true since about 1998, for example, and wasn’t actually as big a deal as people made it out to be to begin with, especially compared with the ways Smalltalk and X/Athena did things.)

    Also, I might want to explain the Eric Raymond swipe above. The rounded rectangle thing was something he actually brought up a couple of weeks ago, which struck be as being ignorant even by his standards, since Steve Jobs was among the first people in the computer industry to emphasize the ubiquity of rounded rectangles in design. And Raymond is actually the epitome of insane Android fanbois — he’s accused Apple on several occasions of outright coverups and knowingly selling poor-quality product. That sort of thinking is par for the course with him though — to those who mostly just know him for software and gun advocacy, the fact that he’s a full-blown tinfoil hatter with a nasty racist streak who’s almost into Alex Jones territory sometimes comes as a bit of a shock.

  32. andyo says

    People talk about creepy Mac cultists that wont shut up about their platform of choice, but yet whenever Apple is mentioned anywhere, there’s a 10-1 ratio of haters spouting off before even paying attention to the post in question. Madness.

    That’s obviously not true. Most arguments spur from responses to one of the comments, which might or might not have been OT.

    eliasfox:

    Indeed. I think it’s actually endemic to a certain sector of the open source community, and the utterly deranged Android fanbois are part of it. Typical case of turning a moral stand into a superiority complex.

    Superiority complex? Have you even seen Apple marketing? Stop projecting.

  33. says

    Really, being a mac user is in many regards similar to religion…

    What an enlightened and rational view. After all, it’s completely impossible that other people might have different preferences and uses for their devices than you do.

    Clearly, you’re the standard for humans everywhere, so if someone differs from you, there must be something wrong with them.

  34. says

    When I was in Beijing in May, the IPhone 5 was already being advertised everywhere.

    Also, I have to admit that I’m quite fond of my recently purchased Macbook Air. Such a nice little machine…

  35. tim rowledge, Ersatz Haderach says

    Over a long parade of years I’ve used, developed for and in quite a few cases developed, everything from IBM 370’s, CP/M, DOS, RISC OS, Windows, Mac OS, Linux, various other unix flavours, and a couple of custom nightmares. I grew to dislike pretty much all of them since they’re all horribly flawed, outrageously buggy and poorly thought out. After so much pain I just want the least awful experience for my dotage and Macs are less pain to own in my opinion. Your opinion is frankly speaking irrelevant, pointless, stupid, lacking in any sound basis, ridiculous, bigoted, biased and smells like Limburger cheese a year past it’s sell-by date. S’there.

  36. thebookofdave says

    I hate Apple. And food. But I need to share pictures of my cats with friends. If Apple will help me turn my housecats into lolcats, I’ll turn around and buy the iPhone 6.

  37. says

    andyo:

    Apple marketing has fuck-all to do with my point. This is about the ridiculous behavior of a subset of the open source community, and isn’t that different from some of the same snottiness responsible for the sexist bullshit and libertarian garbage in the skeptical community. (You might also want to look under Stop Having Fun Guys on TVTropes for a similar mentality with even lower stakes.)

    Truth is, most Mac and/or iOS users like their systems for one of a couple of different reasons — 1) they prefer the technology, 2) they like the aesthetics, or 3) it’s what they’re used to and they see no reason to switch. The deranged Mac fanboyism you mock hasn’t existed in any great amount in over a decade, in part because it came from a position of being an underdog platform. Apple’s been a trendsetter in hardware design for so long that I don’t think that attitude even exists anymore, at least not in any significant number. News for you: Apple users use Apple products because they like Apple products.

    Incidentally, I have both Mac and Linux on my desk, and both iOS and Android devices. Both work well, but the Apple products are still substantially more polished.

  38. andyo says

    This is about the ridiculous behavior of a subset of the open source community, and isn’t that different from some of the same snottiness responsible for the sexist bullshit and libertarian garbage in the skeptical community.

    Wha? So you’re reacting to people who compare Mac users to religious folks, by comparing them to sexists and libertarians?

    andyo:

    Rubbish. The hyperbolic bashing and stupidity starts at post 3, and isn’t in response to any comment.

    I’ll give you post #4 as well, but that’s still not a 10-to-1 ratio. Oh, wait. You were being hyperbolic?

  39. andyo says

    News for you: Apple users use Apple products because they like Apple products.

    Hmm I wonder if even the most vicious of Apple haters even doubt this.

    The deranged Mac fanboyism you mock hasn’t existed in any great amount in over a decade

    I don’t think I have mocked it, at least not on this thread, and not that I can remember either. But are you sure it doesn’t exist “in any great amount”? I guess we have different definitions of fanboyism, which mine includes “making lines for any amount of time over 15 minutes on launch day before the store opens”. Not that there’s much wrong with that in my book. Happens with many other brands.

    Incidentally, I have both Mac and Linux on my desk, and both iOS and Android devices. Both work well, but the Apple products are still substantially more polished.

    Hey, I have an iPod Touch, iPod Classic, a Nexus 7, two Android phones, had two older iPods, run Windows 7 computers, and planning on getting a retina iPad. I’m not a racist either!

  40. says

    andyo:

    Did you seriously just compare an off-hand remark illustrating ballpark numbers with stupid shit like “ROUNDED RECTANGLES LOL”?

  41. says

    @56:

    To the extent that the mentality resembles the sexists (mainly the evo psych crowd, but quite a few others) and libertarians infesting the skeptical movement, fuck yeah I am. The mentality is the same wanky ego-tripping with a dose of “I’ll show them”. Rather convenient elision on your part, no?

    As for your amusing attempt to compare my statement to a racist saying they’re not racist (fuck you very much for that by the way), I am speaking as someone who uses both platforms and has developed opinions about both the culture and the technology.

  42. timberwoof says

    “It’s Apple, it’s closed, and if you try to do anything with it we’ll sue you.”

    Bullshit.

    The developer tools ship with the OS; you can read the developer documentation on Apple’s web site; you can write apps for your Mac for free. Much of the underlying OS stuff is open; the rest is documented and Apple even gives you sample apps so you can learn how to write apps.

    Okay, iOS is regulated. You have to pay a hundred bucks to get a certificate that lets you put your developed apps on a limited number of iOS devices. That’s less than Microsoft’s price for the Windows developer tools … and that’s the price for user security on phones. It’s a trade-off and you’re free to live with it or not.

    The recent MacBook with no memory sockets is pissing a lot of people off. Well, okay. Every recent Mac of mine, I upgraded to huge amounts of RAM soon after I bought it. I never used the sockets again. If they can make the thing lighter without them, fine; I’ll order the moby from the start.

    Upgrading? Really!? I’ve never upgraded the CPU in a PC … if a CPU is worth upgrading to, then you also need new bridge chips, memory, and GPU. Toss the whole motherboard … and then you need a new power supply and hard drive while you’re at it. Don’t just replace the engine, transmission, and brakes; get a whole new car.

    I guess that screed makes me an Apple fanboy and apologist. I can do Linux, too: It’s a permissions problem. RTFM.

  43. says

    Timberwoof:

    There’s actually a little more to the iOS thing than most people make out. The point behind that is embedded in the very early history of the Macintosh — Steve Jobs wanted a system that wasn’t going to have problems with people shooting themselves in the foot. iOS is pretty much the fulfillment of that vision, and to that end, unsigned apps are locked out so they can’t stomp all over the OS. (The fact that Apple takes a 30% cut is just gravy really.) IMHO the issues with Apple’s editorial policies are legit — I don’t think the plan was or is perfect — but the technical logic behind it is sound. The point is that someone can look at an iOS device and make an informed decision in favor of the platform, and legal steps have been taken to ensure the device can be jailbroken if the user wishes to. Apple doesn’t support it? Apple doesn’t have to. IMHO giving up your warranty for a jailbreak is a fair trade. Android is a more open platform. That’s fine too, and it’s a legitimate reason to choose Android over iOS. The problem is the people who take the moral imperative to an extreme — the whole thing just runs out of control and you get an insane fanboi.

    As for the hardware issue… funny about that. I have been getting the distinct sense that Apple has been largely ignoring the Hackintosh community. They know very well that people want hardware flexibility, but because of the philosophy behind the platform, they’re not going to support it. So if my suspicion is correct, they’ve basically decided to give people what they want on condition that they don’t have anything to do with any of it. Want an upgradeable Mac laptop? Go buy a Dell or HP or whatever and do it yourself, don’t bother Apple about it.

  44. andyo says

    andyo:

    Did you seriously just compare an off-hand remark illustrating ballpark numbers with stupid shit like “ROUNDED RECTANGLES LOL”?

    Not comparing, just pointing out the irony of your complaint.

    But “10-1 ratio” is “ballpark”, and not simple hyperbole? OK then.

  45. tim rowledge, Ersatz Haderach says

    Brian @54; yeh, I know. Scary thought isn’t it? I did actually have an IBM PC/370 a looking time ago. Very strange thing.

  46. Akira MacKenzie says

    Oh look! A “computers/Internet is dehumanizing” video made by one of those pretentious, luddite-wannabe jerk-offs who pride themselves for not owning a television. Like I haven’t seen that bullshit a hundred times before since… oh… 1995. I hate to break it to you moonbeam, but we’d be just as shallow and and unfulfilled without iPhones or social media. If anything, dealing with flesh-and-blood people makes humanity all the more disgusting and worthy of extinction. At least with the Internet, I can filter out the worst of it.

  47. says

    #63:

    While considering the possibility of running Hercules on my Pogoplug (couldn’t come up with much of anything to do with it honestly, but a mainframe the size of a Rubik’s Cube is pretty cool) I ran across a Herc user’s quote along the lines of “My son was complaining to me about setting up MVS and I knew he’d learned all there was to know about the mainframe world”. I’m not sure if that makes the difficulty of finding a copy of z/OS better or worse :-)

  48. says

    It’s a trade-off and you’re free to live with it or not.

    Given Apple’s recent attempts to ban competition (If the jury agrees with Apple’s absurd claims on Samsung devices, they’re sure to go after Android itself next), I’m not so sure that “trade off” will be available much longer.

    The “moral imperative” crowd is irritating as hell, given Apple’s completely distasteful philosophy for Mac/iOS, I almost (read: almost) can’t blame them for it.

  49. esmith4102 says

    Funny! Finally, I can not only demonstrate I have a life, but also revel in brief moments of happiness. Apple outdoes itself once again! Sign me up!

  50. KillJoy says

    Oh dear.
    All this animosity over platform choice.
    Silly monkies. Your whacky antics make me laugh.
    Seriously. I can’t think of anything less important.
    Some folks need to grow up and gain a little perspective.

    Condescendingly yours, I remain,
    KJ

  51. tim rowledge, Ersatz Haderach says

    Brian @ 65 – you can apparently run that on a $35 RaspberryPi as well. The world is going insane, mad I tell you. They’ll be giving the vote to ordinary people next!

  52. says

    tim rowledge, Ersatz Haderach @ 51

    Thank you for putting your thoughts in.

    My first computer was a Mac. Then I switched to a Dell PC, then a HP PC, then I bought a Toshiba labtop. They all slowed down to a snails pace in months. Same thing at work where we all live in a PC world. Between software conflicts (not the PC’s fault) to the slow boot up time it sometimes it is pain in you know where.

    My wife’s MacBook Pro, meh, no problems.

    And we both have iPhones and love them. And they work in Europe.

    All is personal preference.

  53. Old At Heart says

    All corporations and individuals have faults. Some more than others, but there are no faultless groups.

    So Apple is more about Marketing than about Development? Oh well, it works out well for them.

    Buying out nearly every compatible microchip from nearly every production company possible the year the iPod came out to ensure low competition despite those chips just going into a landfill? A bit wasteful, but an amazing business gambit.

    So PC likes to rip off Apple? Business studies show that emulators of the original tend to do more poorly unless their price competition is powerful, Apple proponents shouldn’t complain but cheer.

    I like Windows. I do not like the route it has taken and run a modded form of XP that lets me multitask more efficiently instead of using 7 or 8 because I dislike the “Mac-like” route they’ve taken, in essence costing them business. But old Windows was excellent and no-nonsense, intuitive, clear, and easy to use and modify. The best for the “know-nothing” and “high-knowledge” users both.

    I like Macintosh. Their products are simple, accessible to the lowest common denominator at their 75% level (jailbreaking to get 100% functionality is beyond LCD level). Their marketing and R&D are fantastic. And their viruses are hilarious (the one that keeps opening the CD tray and making farting noises at the user? Classy.). The best for the “mid-range” users, with enough knowledge to get the most out of the inherently crippled product by jailbreaking it.

    I like Ubuntu. Like Mac, it turns a Linux kernel into something actually quite elegant and usable. Unlike Mac, you’ll never get a virus on it, neither funny nor dangerous. However the learning curve is vertical, and you wind up relying on their community a lot to figure things out (dunno if that’s a good or bad thing). And hey, it’s free. The best for those with the time and energy to learn it, easily the strongest of the systems for the highest level of tech-savvy people, but everyone else will find it wanting.

    The companies? Same as any: Amoral and scuzzy. The leaders? All three figureheads are no longer involved. But hey, at least they aren’t EA or Sony. A company or a product, all have ups and downs.

    …And I enjoyed the video, though I saw it somewhere else first.

  54. colonelzen says

    Emacs, because vi is at the middle of all evil.

    Seriously I love linux and anticipate *never* using a closed platform for my personal boxen, Linux is now thoroughly screwed up too. A little problem called Gnome … which shows that when anything gets too popular (and we’re talking low single digits percentage wise of users here) network effects will give moieties too much power, almost as bad as commercial aggregates. The Gnome people have screwed up Linux so effectively last year and for at least the next year that I couldn’t possibly recommend it to a non-techie. Earlier I would have enthusiastically have recommended Ubuntu but Canonical have turned their spinoff of Gnome into an abortion on its own, while the commisariat of the Gnome Foundation proper has committed an act of self love spectacular and ludicrous leaving their product unusably sticky with a definite foul odor.

    Android, of course, is Linux based but fortunately doesn’t directly suffer the ignominy of Gnome, but google has intentionally released parts of their plattorm under different licenses allowing vendors to coopt it with custom configuration and “sytsem” apps that range from merely unstable to yes I want that dry pinapple lovin with a lemon juice enema chaser.

    Apple often does provide a better experience than *any* other choices … but can do so *because* it is a locked down, no technical choices, tigthly controlled platform. This should not be a surprise.

    Yes Apple has become not just evil but loathsome of late (while Microsoft was always evil and loathsome, even so they were so big we geenrally *had* to deal with them for some things) but while slow, the water is definitely beginning to circle the bowl now).

    But Apple was closed source and transparently evil from the beginning. While the patent stuff is worth commenting upon, it’s not really surprising.

    But why should we freesofters worry about Apple when there’s *real* evil, in a big way afoot. Look at what Oracle’s doing to Java and especially and predictably to MySQL. (yo Feds’, you’ve f’n heard of anti-trust? I know George was having his hair done that day or some such but when the biggest commercial DB company buys up the biggest open source DB company, you should take your thumbs out of your butts, then ease your heads out and take a look at it. Hey, George is retired, it’s a new pres, lamer though he is on such, but you probably won’t get fired for at least making a bit of noise!

    Oh. Yes I watched the video. The caricature of Mac users was quite funny… but my kids don’t fit the caricature and they both have Macs and anticipate buying again soon even at two to three times a similarly spec’d regular laptop. They’re not techies, and the consistency and control makes them able to do their work, listen to their music and do their surfing with minimal tech hassle. And yes the younger is salivating for an I5 …bacause it works seamlessly with her Mac.

    — TWZ

  55. says

    Old At Heart:

    Um… your technical information may be a tad out of date there. Jailbreaking is done on iOS. It’s not necessary on a Mac and the only thing it would accomplish is running everything as root, which, as you should know, is usually a bad idea in Unix. (Well, shutting off the quarantine bit lockout in Mountain Lion might qualify as a jailbreak, but that’s not much of a jail to begin with…)

  56. says

    And let’s be honest, on most modern Unixy systems, pretty much anything that has to be done as root (as opposed to using sudo) is an indication of something having gone horribly wrong…

  57. says

    Actually, an SLR with an iPhone as its processor and screen wouldn’t actually be a bad thing.

    …It would just cost several thousand dollars.

  58. says

    Tad out of date?

    What was the last Mac with a tray? 2002? Mirrored doors didn’t have them stock, nor did the cube, but some of the Emacs did. Last farting noise virus was I think System 7, which was umm… last release 1997.