Capri Holes

I put on a pair of nice linen capris I hadn’t worn in years, and as I was walking out the door to go out, I put my hand on my rear to see if I had put my wallet in my back pocket. And I feel half my fucken azzz poking out of a huge tear in the motherfucken fabric. So I put on a different pair, and checked thoroughly for azzz holes.


  1. thebookofdave says

    No, wtf! Male capris are all about containment. The azzzhole always remains inside.

  2. Charles Sullivan says

    Forgot to mention that I’m glad you posted The Selector and The Skatalites a few days ago. I like that music.

  3. Raucous Indignation says

    I concur. We must have photo documentation of these so-called “azzz holes.”

  4. F [is for failure to emerge] says

    Oh blindrobin, why drag some gender-based crap into one of the most content-neutral threads ever?

  5. CE says

    I thought you were going to say you found $1000 in your old “pants”.

    We just moved and I decided to purge all of the goddamn motherfucker capris from my closet. Capris are fucking everywhere these days. All I want is to buy *whole* motherfucking pants. And I don’t want them to be “skinny”. FUCK.

    On another note, today I was prowling for RFPs that I can apply for. The “requirements” for funding that these agencies come up with are a fucking hoot:

    “solutions should be innovative and have rapid, broad applicability with low financial and technical barriers to implementation.”

    Oh, is that it? Yeah, no prob. I’m sure lots of solutions exist that can be applied broadly and immediately without any financial or technical hurdles.

    I wonder if these people sit around smoking cheap weed all day or if they think scientists are these lazy fucks and if we just put our goddamn minds to it then, presto, all of the world’s problems will disappear.

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