You Should Need A License To Use The Internet

Some fucken ridiculous shittebagge just e-mailed me what purports to be a “flyer” announcing some stupid motherfucken event thatte I’d sooner drive nails through my dicke than attend. The motherfucken file is EIGHTEEN motherfucken megabytes, and it is some kind of “.pub” file which I don’t even know whatte the fucken fucke thatte is, and I certainly have no program that can open the motherfucken thing.

And this same fucken ridiculous shittebagge is constantly e-mailing absurdly large files for no goddamn good reason. Like when we have a motherfucken journal club, she fucken SCANS IN THE GODDAMN PAPERS AT LIKE 1200 PPI and e-mails the goddamn motherfucken 50MB scans, when she could goddamn motherfucken e-mail the fucken link to the fucken paper.


  1. barbrykost says

    A .pub file is from Microsoft Publisher. Only Publisher will open it.
    Your shitteebagge is apparently not too bright.

  2. Buffy says

    Yes, the file is probably a Microsoft Publisher file. The person who sent it should have known that few people are likely to have that program. S/he should have converted it to a PDF before sending it.

  3. Etienne says

    “should have known”… Then again, you have people who send pictures by doing a copy+paste of the jpeg file into a .doc and sending the .doc, because they were taught how to send a .doc file through e-mail, but not how to send a .jpeg file.

  4. Jaketoadie says


    I can do you even better, I used to work phone based tech support (still do, but for a much better company now) and I asked one of my callers to take a screenshot of the error she was getting. They had a tool that when you pressed printscreen it would take a screenshot and open it in a picture viewer. So she took the screenshot, printed it out from the viewer, scanned it in, then sent me the scanned image.

    When I saw that my brain died a little in protest.

  5. jamessweet says

    So she took the screenshot, printed it out from the viewer, scanned it in, then sent me the scanned image.

    Ah hah hah hah hah hah, awesome. I lol’d for realz.

  6. Aquaria says

    My mother still can’t figure out hyperlinks.

    I’m reasonably sure I was switched at birth with somebody else’s kid. Funny thing is, I was taken home by the wrong family originally (seriously). I always swear I went home with the right family that day.

  7. jeremy says

    Thankyou comrade. Prefer to read your writings rather than the video posts. Just my 2 cents. More text please…

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *