Pardon me, but is my brain leaking?

You know, all those tubes and oozing liquids, it’s hard to know where my cerebrospinal fluid ends up.

During intercourse the woman absorbs the literal cerebral fluid and essence of the man, the fluid that contains the nutrients the man chooses to feed his brain; so don’t ever “it’s just sex, im free and liberated” me.

General Jack D. Ripper would be so proud. People who understand biology, not so much.


  1. Artor says

    Cerebral fluids? I must be doing something wrong. Of course, I never liked mind-fucking people, so maybe that’s why my experience has been different.

  2. says

    Obviously, more attention to the mineshaft gap is required. Oh, wait a moment: If the appropriate ratio is ten women to one man, those men will have no cerebrospinal fluid remaining after doing their mile-deep duty to perpetuate the human race…

  3. wzrd1 says

    Artor, for some, I thoroughly enjoy mind-fucking them, but they really have to go out of their way to be so deserving.

    As for nutrients and brain, IRT sex, it’s just that the Creator had a sense of humor in designing man. Giving man two heads and only enough blood to operate one at a time.

  4. christoph says

    Doctors would actually tell young boys that semen was spinal fluid and warned them not to waste it. This was back in the late 1800’s through the 1930’s and 40’s.

  5. Reginald Selkirk says

    During intercourse, the woman absorbs the literal cerebral fluid and essence of the man she’s sleeping with…

    If one or more of you is sleeping, you’re doing intercourse wrong.

  6. weylguy says

    The Jack D. Ripper line was spot on, but I thought it was “Art imitates life,” not the other way round.

  7. Owlmirror says

    Leaping ahead ….
    So the only way to not drain cerebrospinal fluid is for a woman to have sex with another woman?

    And if two men have sex with each other, they’ll merge and share their cerebrospinal fluid, and become a collaborational powerhouse? That’s how Glibert and Sullivan worked their magic?

    (I haven’t looked to see if there is Glibert/Sullivan slashfic, but this scenario raises all sorts of interesting possibilites…)

  8. wzrd1 says

    Reginald Selkirk @ 7, doesn’t that presuppose that the one a woman is sleeping with is one that she had intercourse with?
    The obvious solution is, don’t sleep with the one that one was just screwing.

    But, in her universe, where does her lubrication come from, is it also CSF?

  9. wzrd1 says

    The blood-brain barrier was a bit too expensive for me to justify expending upon, so I got rid of the brain.
    Being married for so long, I found it was largely unused anyway.
    The upside was a massive improvement on the sex life, as only one head required life support.

  10. Alan G. Humphrey says

    Here is an example of taking a comment literally and running with it. Hearing, “Men think with their dicks.”, she decides to Empress upon her captive audience this Xeet. Maybe thinks this seminal work will get the attention of Musk.

  11. birgerjohansson says

    As all body fluids freak me out, stuff like this (plus low libido ) have made sure I have never attempted this kind of interaction.

    This sounds a bit like the extra-terrestrial monster in ” Who Goes There ” (filmed as The Thing ) who tries to infiltrate the bodies of victims.

  12. birgerjohansson says

    The android Ash (played by Ian Holm) had enough tubes and oozing liquids for a whole ship crew.

  13. Artor says

    I have no questions about The Former Guy’s mental competence. It has been evident for a long time that he has none.

  14. nomdeplume says

    My favourite bit is the word “literal”. I do not think that word means what she thinks it means…

  15. microraptor says

    christoph @23:

    Weird Al put it best:

    And I thought that you’d gotten it through your skull
    What’s figurative and what’s literal.
    Oh but, just now, you said
    You literally couldn’t get out of bed.
    That really makes me want to literally
    Smack a crowbar upside your stupid head!

  16. chrislawson says


    It certainly appears their blood-brain barrier isn’t keeping their brains from leaking the other way.

  17. raven says

    About all I got out of reading this is Empress must have skipped all of sex ed from kindergarten to college.
    Actually, according to Google, this is a very old belief, dating at least as far back as 600 BC.

    Leonardo da Vinci and the origin of semen – PMC

    National Institutes of Health (.gov) › articles › PMC4213433

    by D Noble · 2014 · Cited by 12 — The view that semen was derived from the spinal cord was old enough to be denied by Alcmaeon in the sixth century bc, but Plato and …

    Even Leonardo da Vinci diagrammed it this way. Notably, according to the article above, he later corrected his drawings to testes only.

    It is still a current belief, but only among far out lunatic fringers.

    Empress didn’t think it up, she copied it from someone else.

  18. wzrd1 says

    Don’t get me started on the actual origin of semen, orgasm and odd results.
    Some, such as massive histamine response on orgasm newly discovered.
    And accompanying that, a somewhat longer observation of decreasing quantity.

    Suffice it to say, my intracranial helmet of CSF remains unlimbered, that BBB thing protecting it from the havoc below the hood that’s ongoing.

    Given that a sperm sample purely of testicular origin would be a trace quantity, while prostate emissions are a wee bit larger, as in trivially measurable.
    Sperm work best by dilution. Otherwise, they’d be trying to swim through something similar in consistency to jello.

    Oh, previous symptom, burning sensation corresponding to prostate on orgasm.
    I’m at 4 sigma in certainty of origin and issue, but well, it’s not worth the effort to go to doctor a half mile away.
    Unlike Elon, I’m not in the litter making business and have absolutely zero desire to produce young that would end up without my guidance as they mature.
    And well, salivation still works, tear production still works, so it’s not one worrisome syndrome.

    Now, excuse me, I’m actually exhausted. From taking a leak.
    Pharmacy was contacted for a beta blocker refill on Thursday, Doctor received refill request by COB that day.
    Doctor finally assed himself to refill my beta blocker after COB on Tuesday, due to insurance bullshit, beyond 7 day refill requests are denied.
    So, I’m going on day two of beta blocker withdrawal rebound and feeling like shit on rye.
    With a wonderful addition, over the weekend, a molar fractured and gouged a literal quarter inch hole in my tongue.
    Upside, doctor’s orders triggered a message to check the medical portal and I learned I’m nearly overdue for a TSH screening and coming up for an abdominal aorta ultrasound.

    Still, considering doctor waiting twice for two weeks to refill beta blockers, I am considering firing the practice.
    I’m not shy of firing idiots.
    I’m also far from shy about hiring physicians who will say no, when a suggestion is entirely inappropriate.
    My first selection point is physician review sites that scathe the physician for not prescribing antibiotics for what’s obviously a viral infection.
    Once met, forming a partnership of open honestly, entirely.
    Currently, I’ve stuck myself with a practice where I deal with residents. Previously, not a problem, but it seems that the Fellow’s not been tracking things well.

    So, feeling like dogshit on rye, with a shat into coffepot chaser.

  19. jd142 says

    Whenever I see these ‘random young person exposes lack of education posts” here and elsewhere, I always wonder if anyone has tried to correct this woeful misinformation/miseducation and what the response is from the author. Never really been motivated to look it up and find out though. Maybe I should change that.

  20. christoph says

    @ raven, # 28: Thanks, I didn’t know it went back that far. Did you know the ancient Egyptians thought the brain was only for producing mucous? Lots of historical misconceptions about bodily fluids.

  21. Alan G. Humphrey says

    From the last part of the Empress screed, I get a whiff of, “Woman, the sun is still up, so get thee back into the kitchen…”, type of conservatism. If my senses are correct, then the chances of reeducation are slim.

  22. Walter Solomon says

    Very outdated anatomical information. Da Vinci’s drawing “The Copulation” shows the seminal vesicles being connected to the base of the vertebrae so, I assume, this error was once believed.

  23. says

    I’ve seen similar ideas from the Incel et. al. crowd, only it’s male DNA that alters women instead of cerebral fluid.

    If this Empress is actually a black woman, and not some white guy pretending to be one she may have gotten her ideas from the Hotep movement, a group of Afrocentrists with odd ideas about Egyptian history, and all sorts of other things. Calling herself Empress would fit in with their weirdness.

    birgerjohansson@16 Happy Science! I watched one that guy’s reviews/taketowns of a Happy Science movie recently. I’d heard of them before via watching a couple of episodes of Kamen Rider Fourze, the 2012 entry in the long running Japanese superhero franchise. One of the main characters was played by an actress who later dumped her mainstream entertainment career so she could appear in Happy Science productions. Happy Science founder Ryuho Okawa died earlier this year.

  24. battycat13 says

    Way I see it, this one could use a few more nutrients going to her brain.

    Someone wanna tell her jumping up and down afterwards won’t prevent pregnancy?

    And lemon Juice won’t help you rob a bank?

  25. wzrd1 says

    batty, dad offered to drive delayed delivery wife in his dump truck.
    Yeah, such bullshit still exists, if it existed in my era, some dimwhit propagated it.

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