The only anti-vax argument worth having


Whose urine should you drink instead of getting a flu shot?

Also urine delivery is important. Drink it through your mouth and your nose, and get your urine massages, and be sure to get a teaspoon of urine in your belly button every day!

Comments

  1. johnson catman says

    Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! So 45 was just trying to make sure the prostitutes in Russia were protected when he was watching them pee on each other.

  2. says

    The comment I found to be the worst is the last one: categorizing your children into the damaged one and the undamaged one? What the fuck is wrong with you?

  3. says

    I suppose it would be pointless to explain just why you urinate in the first place. People are terrifying in their willingness to embrace stupidity.

  4. says

    PZ:

    categorizing your children into the damaged one and the undamaged one?

    And the ‘damaged’ child is going to end up with a lifetime’s worth of toxic baggage, too. That parent will make that perceived difference more than apparent.

  5. devnll says

    Sooo…. do exercise, change your lifestyle, live happily (low stress)… and drink and bathe in piss. But it’s totally the piss that will improve your health!

  6. A Masked Avenger says

    I’m willing to bet a free lunch that Orange at least was taking the piss.

    I’d also give a lot to convince this woman to start adding her kids’ urine to her bath water. And also post some sort of convincing evidence of having done so, for the convenience of CPS which I would promptly call.

  7. says

    Unfortunately some celebs, like UFC fighter Lyoto Machida, have publicly stated they drink urine. I wouldn’t be surprised if Gwyneth Paltrow advocates doing so sooner or later.

  8. says

    I wouldn’t be surprised if Gwyneth Paltrow advocates doing so sooner or later.

    If someone verrrry carefully crafted their claims they might be able to get away with selling “PaltroPee, the detoxifying brew of green tea and pee, chemically identical to the micturant of the star herself!” (Use ClooneePee for men if you prefer a more macho, kickier detox)

  9. Larry says

    How does one have their body ravaged by heavy metals? Did s/he consume excessive quantities of lead, arsenic, and chromium when younger? Or perhaps, worked in a hat factory or a gold refinery for decades, using mercury without protective clothing and a mask.

  10. vucodlak says

    I drank my own urine, once upon a time (I was maybe 5). I proudly announced that I had done so to a gathering of adult family members. I did not receive a book deal, nor was I hailed as a ‘wellness guru.’ I got an eternity of uncomfortable, staring silence, followed by a quiet, revolted admonition: “Don’t do that.” I didn’t, though I was rather pleased with myself for horrifying a bunch of medical professionals.

    That opening question creeps me out. Part of that is that it reminds me of the beginning of Clive Barker’s “The Hellbound Heart,” wherein the summoner of the Cenobites keeps a tank of urine nearby in case they want him debase himself. He suffers for his lack of imagination.

    How does she mean “use their urine?” Is she going to bathe in it? That’s a lot of piss, and it does ‘spoil’ fairly quickly. Is she going to inject it? Sepsis is a nasty way to die. Is she going to drink it? It’s no good cold, I can tell you that much, and it doesn’t keep so… that’s (probably) a felony. Really, there’s just something seriously squicky about ‘using’ a child’s urine on (or in) your body. I suppose it shouldn’t necessarily be a crime if all she’s doing is having them take a cup into the bathroom, but still…

    Don’t do that.

  11. robro says

    Wonder how teal parent might feel if their “undamaged” son contracts a vaccine-preventable disease? Or a friend of his contracts such a disease? I guess it’s too much to hope that Child Protective Services might step in.

  12. says

    I bet Gwyneth Paltrow’s personal pee would receive a premium price. And if she’s concerned about volume, she could sell homeopathic dilutions!

  13. Matt G says

    Isn’t this one of the traits we ascribe to crazy people? We find them living in their parents’ basement surrounded by mason jars of their own urine?

  14. blf says

    Ignoring that an influx of unvaccinated loons is not what Puerto Rico needs at the moment, these unvaccinated loons should go there to avail themselves of the post-hurricane urine-contaminated drinking water and get a case of leptospirosis.

  15. kevinv says

    Way back in college I saw a speech by John Waters, he told a story about how one of the strangest things he saw was working with Johnny Depp. Apparently people would drain the waste storage on his trailer in hopes of getting more than just his pee I guess.

  16. jrkrideau says

    Your boys are so lucky to be free of vaccine damage

    And so unlucky to have you as a mother. Let’s hope you don’t kill them with your incredible stupidity.

    categorizing your children into the damaged one and the undamaged one? What the fuck is wrong with you?

    Obviously a lot but this is standard anti-vaxer terminology and thinking.

    I’m willing to bet a free lunch that Orange at least was taking the piss.

    Probably not. Something like this seems fairly normal. Now, the bleach enemas to treat autism sounds a bit nasty; and no, I am not joking.

  17. Feline says

    I’ve had a lot of people through the years tell me that urine is sterile, and therefore safe to drink (no, it can’t be sterile since it came out of the urinary tract, which is noticeably not sterilized). Which I would guess comes from the fact that in the short term it’s better to drink piss than salt water (I believe, haven’t actually looked at the actual concentrations), but one really shouldn’t view “better than worst” as “the best”. The binary there is really unwarranted.
    Also, it’s disgusting. Just like eating placenta.

  18. TheGyre says

    Her body is ravaged by Lyme disease? Doesn’t she know there are antibiotics for that? And if it has progressed too far there are meds to treat the pain? The only way I’d drink urine is if I were adrift at sea and I ran out of water. I doubt that would even cure my thirst.

  19. vucodlak says

    @ TheGyre, #25
    RE: drinking urine when lost at sea
    Provided you were properly hydrated to start with, and you haven’t sweated too much, you can drink your urine once (or maybe twice) before it becomes too much work for your kidneys to process. That’s what I’ve read, anyway; I wouldn’t swear it works, and I haven’t tried it. In any case, it won’t buy you more than a couple of more hours.

    On the other hand, if you’re lost in the desert you can (and should) piss in your solar-still’s hole to reclaim the water.

  20. Pierce R. Butler says

    Though not sterile, your own urine may be suitable for cleaning a wound, since it won’t have any bacteria in it which you don’t already have antibodies for.

    The trick is positioning yourself so that whatever gouges you does so in a urethra-accessible place. (Both these points also apply to wound-licking; combining the two might provide a placebo effect for those who inspired this post).

  21. emergence says

    Okay, so these people think that vaccines are dangerous, but drinking and bathing in piss is healthy? I’m beginning to think that these people are getting their information from the backwards dimension. The next thing you know, they’re going to start saying that head trauma improves brain function and chewing on rocks is good for your teeth.

  22. chigau (違う) says

    Pierce R. Butler #27

    The trick is positioning yourself so that whatever gouges you does so in a urethra-accessible place.

    Please provide a diagram of this situation.
    *winkwink*nudgenudge*

  23. vereverum says

    Falstaff: Sirrah, you giant, what says the doctor to my water?
    Page: He said, sir, the water itself was a good healthy water; but, the party that owed it, he might have more diseases than he knew of.

  24. says

    @#17, PZ Myers

    And if she’s concerned about volume, she could sell homeopathic dilutions!

    …you know, I bet you could raise a fair amount of money at some sort of atheist/science event by selling overpriced water with fake labels saying “homeopathic dinosaur urine”.

  25. multitool says

    I am on the fence whether Orange is just a troll exploring how much he can get gullible people to debase themselves.

    I mean, imagine you are such a troll. Would you write it any differently?

  26. mykroft says

    If they think drinking urine is good for you, imagine how robust their health would be with fecal supplements. They’re full of probiotics!

  27. says

    @#17 – The Vicar (via Freethoughtblogs)

    “homeopathic dinosaur urine”

    And of course don’t forget plastic, that’s made out of 100% recycled dinosaurs – what could be more natural than that?

  28. blf says

    “homeopathic dinosaur urine”

    Dissolving and shaking a dinosaur to extract its urine seems cruel.

  29. Rich Woods says

    Dissolving and shaking a dinosaur to extract its urine seems cruel.

    As does hitting it with a leather-bound bible.

  30. says

    On the other hand, if you’re lost in the desert you can (and should) piss in your solar-still’s hole to reclaim the water.

    Wasn’t this part of the idea behind stillsuits in the Dune books?

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