1. birgerjohansson says

    I am just like the fat Jesus Michelangelo painted to balance the two skinny ones (this was before the pope made him paint over the excess jesii and the kangaroos).

  2. davidchapman says

    PZ Myers

    I’m just like Jesus

    We’re both bearded white guys who can’t dance.

    PZ the messiah?? Come on, you’re nowhere close.
    Jesus can’t dance on water!! Can’t you?? :)

  3. davidchapman says

    Also, ferrchrist’s sake, does anyone know what the last word of the sentence at the bottom of this venerable tome says?? “Featuring a Host of Miraculous………….”
    What’s?? It’s driving me nuts.
    (Yeah OK, sad, I know. )

  4. blf says

    Mr Carpentersson was an evolutionary biologist?
    No wonder his cultists are soooooo interested in sex…

    (And I guess nailing people to a tree was an early form of preparing a microscopic slide…)

  5. Endorkened says

    Moves. Miraculous moves. Which in this case apparently consists of that one dance step everyone did in late 80s/early 90s cartoons to save money on animation.

  6. lakitha tolbert says

    That is Carleton’s Dance from The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air from the early 90’s. Meant to be danced to the tune of “It’s Not Unusual” by Tom Jones.
    That dance was created specifically for Holo-Jesus.

  7. moarscienceplz says

    Jeebus may look like he’s doin’ Neo’s bullet-dodging dance, but if Jeebus can’t even dodge spears and nails, I’m pretty sure bullets would have no problem finding his soft, fleshy bits.

  8. azhael says

    Aaaaand i should have really read all the comments rather than go atraight to posting….
    Sorry lakitha xD

  9. woozy says

    To the contrary, not as witnessed by a field of hundreds this Easter in San Francisco’s Golden Gate Park, not only can Jesus dance. Jesus can twerk.

    One thing I like about living in this area, is you can have a Hunky Jesus Competition and … not have actually hear about it.

    (All right, all the “San Francisco is actually more repressive then anywhere else because you delude yourselves into thinking you are more progressive and are blind to your shortcomings, you tyrannical hypocrites” can begin.)

    (As can all the the “The fact that you take delight in sacrilege of Jesus just means that deep down you actually care, you tyrannical hypocrites”.)

    (The simple fact is a few hundred people thought a Hunky Jesus Competition would be fun. So they had one. And they had fun. And everyone else who wasn’t interested didn’t have to have anything to do with it. So they didn’t. And no-one was put out in any way.)

    (Actually I’m sorry I hadn’t heard about it as it looks a little fun.)

  10. jackal says

    The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, an order of drag clown nuns, holds the Hunky Jesus contest every year as part of their Easter festivities. This year, they added the Foxy Mary contest. The purpose of the Sisters is not to insult, but to broaden the scope of what is considered acceptable and good. Also to spread love, joy, and info on safe sex.