It’s inevitable now

The Minnesota Senate has approved gay marriage. It now goes to Governor Dayton, who has already said he’ll sign it, and then we’re at last edging our way into the 21st century.

Not everyone is happy about it.

"In my heart, I grieve on both sides. Because I know what it’s like to be alone and I know what it is like to have somebody close to you and love you. But I grieve inside because I feel we are opening the doors to Sodom and Gomorra. And in the end, God is going to be the judge," said Nelson, of Blaine, tears running down her cheeks.

I would bottle your tears and perhaps dot a little on my wrists every morning — Eau de Schadenfreude. Or perhaps I would drink them like a rich bitter wine, and laugh. Those aren’t tears of sorrow, but of nasty cruel bigotry — you didn’t get your way, you weren’t allowed to demean other citizens of this state in the way you wanted, and now you get to weep in frustration, while I have no sympathy.

And to compare the happy men and women who can now aspire to share equally in love and marriage with evil, wicked horrible people from your book of lies, to tell yourself they are damned and will be destroyed…well, I’ll dance an especially happy spiteful dance on your broken dreams of oppression, lady.


  1. mythbri says

    And in the end, God is going to be the judge

    Said every bigot on the wrong side of history, ever.

  2. says

    I’m okay with a nonexistent judge. They seldom hand down harsh rulings. (Their minions, on the other hand — those nutcases terrify me.)

  3. says

    Ugh. Listening to some of those senators envoke Jesus, the Holy Spirit, the scriptures…just about made me puke. Eventually, though, and in spite of the fundie bigots, we won! Proud to be a Minnesotan today!

  4. Goodbye Enemy Janine says

    Poor Nelson, of Blaine. Is she going to have to marry an other woman. Is she going to have to change her life at all?

    Sorry, I am not humane enough to feel any pity for the likes of her.

  5. mothra says

    NPR has interviewed some whining pastor calling it a dark day. He stated that as a pastor of a small church he emphasized the death and resurrection motif in most sermons and added, ‘we’re not going away and we will be back.’ Too bad the reporter did not respond with: ‘Yes, in the last legislative session, you and yours tried to write bigotry into the MN consitution. Your actions were put to death, and a better MN has been resurrected.’

  6. lurker in a strange land says

    And soon Texas will follow suit…uhm…and soon…
    oh crap, I forgot I live in the strange land of Texas now.

    Maybe next century.

  7. Rey Fox says

    Tell her that God isn’t really into the whole city-wide smiting thing anymore. I mean, unless you count cities on coastlines prone to hurricanes. Or cities on major tectonic boundaries.

  8. Goodbye Enemy Janine says

    Will Goodhair lead Texas out of the Union is this becomes federal law? It is not like he never has suggested that before.

  9. Goodbye Enemy Janine says

    Thanks Audley. Now I am picturing PZ as half of a bear couple. Which would be the Trophy Bear™?

  10. says

    The most glaring falsehood in her entire statement: she knows what it is like to love.

    Don’t worry dear. You got to inflict a lot of damage. Like I told that evil Lynne Ostermann, you managed to run out the clock on my partner’s life. Fourteen years of not marriage ended when she died in January. So never fear, dear evil lady, you did your Lord’s work. How proud you must both be of raiding my marital assets to put into faith based initiative proselytizing. How proud you must both be of making this incredibly impossible ordeal all the more difficult.

    Frankly, I wouldn’t worship anything that can look at the warmth, love, comfort, companionship, and happiness that was us and call it bad or evil. That you can tells you exactly how twisted and, dare I say it, unnatural your beliefs are. The only thing more unnatural than looking at us and being repulsed by that love would be for parents to reject their offspring. Oh wait, your faith encourages that too!

    It must be very, very hard to go through life with absolutely no innate instincts as to what is good or bad. No wonder you are so easily twisted by the spite-filled words of money grubbing preachers. I can’t wish any worse on you than is already the case: you are trapped in this world with your mind and your heart. And you cannot take joy in things that are good and lovely. And you take joy in hate and strife. I’m not sure why you even bother worrying about Hell when you are more than happy to live in it in the here and now.

  11. Ulysses says

    Poor Nelson of Blaine. Her hopes for denying her fellow citizens the same rights she enjoys are dashed.

  12. says

    Yay for MN!

    I’ll dance an especially happy spiteful dance on her grave. If it’s not too inconvenient, that is. Otherwise I’ll just be happy that she’ll be forgotten, another typical Xtian bigot, American Midwest, circa 2013.

    Nah nah nah nah, nah nah nah nah, hey hey, goodbye.

  13. marcus says

    “How come Gomorrah never got a ‘sin’ named after it?”
    What, you’ve never heard of ‘gommoralingus’? It’s very hot and is still on the books as illegal in 25 states.
    Congratulations Minnesota!!

  14. dianne says

    When New York passed our marriage equality bill, my opposite-sex marriage was dissolved and I was forced to marry a woman. She’s very nice, but I miss my husband. :(

    But I thought once you legalized gay marriage polygamy automatically became legal too. Can’t you and she join your husband in a group marriage?

  15. Goodbye Enemy Janine says

    And now our collective snarking is interrupted by a real story about real pain that people like Nelson, of Blaine are actually calling for. The tears spilled by Nelson, of Blaine were never for the partner of Barbyau or for Barbyau. They are selfish tears, cried for a selfish ideal.

  16. frankb says

    Ah, Nelson of Blaine, that’s Christian Love that is. I live south of the border in Iowa and I am relieved that one of our neighboring states has converted.

  17. says


    Now I am picturing PZ as half of a bear couple. Which would be the Trophy Bear™?

    Trophy Bear™ would be the one with the most chest hair.


    Can’t you and she join your husband in a group marriage?

    No, because it would have to be multiple partners of the same sex. New York totally sucks now!

  18. Randomfactor says

    Gomorrah’s sin was excessive pride. Its punishment was NOT getting a sin named after it.

  19. says

    Just barely under 25% of states now. Hopefully we get to knock off a few more in 2014, and even more still in 2016.

    I love the smell of progress in the afternoon.

  20. Brother Yam says

    I so enjoy hearing about how god is gonna this and how satan’s gonna that and Minnesota is gonna go somewhere and, and, and…

    Man these people are so fucking stupid. The same tears have been shed throughout history over other social improvements (women voting, civil rights, etc.) that you’d think that these clowns would recognize history and get on the right side of it.


    They’re just look like the morons that fought against busing and any other civil rights victory — small-minded and bigoted.

  21. dragon says

    @6 Janine:

    Sorry, I am not humane enough to not feel any pity for the likes of her.

    FTFY. You are the humane one.

  22. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    A three minute cheer with confetti for the Minnesota Senate. A free first drink at the Pharyngula Saloon and Spanking Parlor tonight, with free drinks all night after the Governor does the right thing with his pen.

  23. Louis says

    I don’t understand the problem. The bible clearly says if a man lies with another man ,as he would with a woman, then he must be stoned. What with gay marriage being legalised in several states and marijuana being also legalised in several states, I’m thinking the USA got more biblical.

    Fucking god-botherers, they complain even when they get everything their own way.

    Or have I misunderstood something?


    P.S. To save someone “explaining” it to me, I get it. This Am An Joke. Yay Minnesota!

  24. anteprepro says

    But I grieve inside because I feel we are opening the doors to Sodom and Gomorra. And in the end, God is going to be the judge,”

    This is conservatism in a nutshell: Tears of rage from fear of change.

  25. carlie says

    I am very sorry, barbayu. I wish you could have had all the protections and acclamations that you both deserved.

  26. NitricAcid says

    @barbayu. Very sorry about your loss.

    @#5 I thought that was what “gommorhea” was named after.

  27. says

    Michelle Bachmann is threatening to leave Minnesota. And she too has Sodom and Gomorrah on her mind:

    Congresswoman Michele Bachmann threatened to leave Minnesota today if the state goes ahead with its plans to legalize gay marriage.

    In an interview with a local television station, the conservative firebrand said she believes God will destroy Minneapolis once the legislation is enacted, and wants to be far away when the reckoning happens.

    “The Bible is very clear on this issue,” she told KSTP-TV this morning, “Homosexuality is a sin, and God will punish communities that support it
    “Sodom and Gomorrah thought they could defy the will of God – and we all know what happened to them. If the governor signs this legislation into law the Minneapolis-St. Paul region will be next.
    “I have a friend from Eden Prairie who’s already packed everything she owns into her car and is driving out to Montana as we speak. These are very scary times. I don’t want my family to be the last ones out.” …

    The Daily Currant link.

  28. says

    ^ That is a spoof site, unfortunately for my state, fortunately for someone else’s state.

    Many thanks to you all and your kind comments. Today has been a surprisingly upsetting day.

  29. says

    Uh-oh, someone please warn Oregon, as Michelle Bachmann may be on her way to Eugene. Also, she provided more details regarding the path of wrath that her God may take:

    “I don’t know what it will be, Bruce,” she said, “it could be an earthquake. It could be a volcano. It could be some sort of flesh eating virus. All I know is that God does not let homosexuality go unpunished, and Minneapolis is next in line for his wrath.

    “It breaks my heart to think that the Democrats are willing to play politics with the lives of so many Minnesotans. And I hate to leave so many of my constituents behind, but I urge them – please, please – follow my example and get your loved ones to safety before it’s too late.”

    In a subsequent interview with The Daily Currant Bachmann says she’s not sure where she’ll go if she leaves, but is seriously considering Oregon as a possibility since its constitution bans same sex marriage.
    “I’ve heard wonderful things about Eugene,” she says, “and I think congressman DeFazio may be vulnerable to a challenge. They’re the nicest people in the world out there, I’m sure we’d be welcomed with open arms.”

  30. says

    Yep, The Daily Current is a satirical site. Note that we cannot tell the difference between a satire of Bachmann’s view and what she actually says.

  31. says

    Here are some things Michelle Bachmann actually did say, as opposed to the satirical imaginings of The Daily Currant:

    … During an appearance at the evangelical Liberty Counsel’s Awakening 2013 captured by Right Wing Watch

    , Bachmann urged attendees to keep up the fight against gay marriage, abortion and “Islamic jihad,” claiming that God supported those campaigns. She then took a line from the Bible’s book of Ephesians to suggest that these battles are supernatural struggles against the forces of evil.

    “Because we need to recognize the desperate situation of our condition, not only in the natural but also in the supernatural,” she said. “Because as the scripture was read from the pulpit at Margaret Thatcher’s funeral, we fight not against this world, we fight against the powers and principalities and ‘Prince of the Air’; that’s where we need to focus as well, is on spiritual warfare…” …
    Watch out for Satan! Video and more detail at the link.

  32. says

    Apologies for borking my blockquote tags in comment 37. Everything from “During an appearance” to “spiritual warfare” should be within the blockquote.

  33. anuran says

    She is absolutely right about the Sodom and Gomorrah thing. The problem is, she doesn’t know her Magic Book very well.

    Ezekiel 16:49-50
    Behold, this was the guilt of your sister Sodom: she and her daughters had arrogance, abundant food and careless ease, but she did not help the poor and needy.

    Thus they were haughty and committed abominations before Me. Therefore I removed them when I saw it.

    Hospitality to strangers has been sacred in Middle Eastern cultures as far back as we have records. Charity towards the poor and needy isn’t just a good idea according to the Abrahamic religions. It is a categorical, no-excuses-accepted imperative. So yes, this Nation, and the Republican Party in particular is guilty of the Sin of Sodom. If Invisible Sky Wizard really is in charge like they say we can expect the smitings to begin any day now, just not for the reasons they believe.

  34. Nerd of Redhead, Dances OM Trolls says

    Many thanks to you all and your kind comments. Today has been a surprisingly upsetting day.

    No doubt strong emotions are percolating through your mind.

    Every time the topic of gay marriage comes up, my question is how does the marriage (in Canada) of the Redhead’s gay cousin and his long time partner hurt the long marriage of the Redhead and myself. The silence is deafening. And the reactions of those bigots calling every time Illinois brings up said topic when they get the Redhead who can’t find anything wrong in one person marrying another person they love is amusing. The gasps of horror and incoherent sputtering of said bigots must be priceless, but I only hear about it second hand.

    At a family reunion shortly after the above marriage happened, I commented how if one listened to their complaints of each other, they sounded like a long term married couple venting, but going nowhere. Not surprising how fast other people picked up on that once it was pointed out to them. They’re still together today, just as the Redhead and myself.

  35. otrame says


    I am so sorry. I can understand why you’d be upset today, even though you must be pleased for all the couples for whom it is not too late. Wish I could give you more than a virtual hug.

  36. raven says

    I feel we are opening the doors to Sodom and Gomorra.

    Another xian illiterate as well as a bigot.

    The sin of Sodom was being run by an old version of the Tea Party!!!

    Ezekial 16:


  37. raven says

    Oops something happened to my blockquoting. Once again.

    I feel we are opening the doors to Sodom and Gomorra.

    Another xian illiterate as well as a bigot.

    The sin of Sodom was being run by an old version of the Tea Party!!!

    Ezekial 16:

    49 “‘Now this was the sin of your sister Sodom: She and her daughters were arrogant, overfed and unconcerned;

    they did not help the poor and needy.

    50 They were haughty and did detestable things before me. Therefore I did away with them as you have seen.

    The sin of Sodom was being run by the forerunner of the GOP.

    There is a lot of proof the xian god doesn’t exist. If it did, there would be a lot more lightning bolts and a lot few xians.

  38. frog says

    I’m sure that some of them–possibly even Nelson, of Blaine, and almost certainly Bachmann–are completely faking their devoutness and subsequent fear that marriage equality will bring on the apocalypse. But there are genuine, real people whose only fault is being unfortunate enough to grow up in a brainwashing and indoctrination camp that has stripped them of their ability to think critically. Their delusions are causing them real terror. If it were anything but religion, we would be offering them counseling and medication.

    I hope the subsequent lack of smiting will let at least some of them start to figure out where they went wrong.

    That said, my gut reaction is summed up as, “Cry, you hate-mongering, fear-mongering, deluded bigot. Cry rivers. Cry until you need to guzzle Gatorade lest you dehydrate.”

    Also, this puts me in mind of one of my favorite movie-quote modifications:

    “What is best in life?”
    “To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to dip your cookies in their tears.”

  39. raven says

    And in the end, God is going to be the judge,”

    I can live with that.

    A lot of countries and states have already legalized gay marriage long ago.

    So far god hasn’t done anything. Nothing. (Well, at least he is consistent. He hasn’t done anything tangible in centuries.)

    Apparently Nelson of Blaine can’t or she wouldn’t be weeping tears of rage and hate. Xians always claim their god is all powerful and act like he is dead. Or nonexistent.

  40. illdoittomorrow says

    frog, @ 48,

    “What is best in life?”
    “To crush your enemies, to see them driven before you, and to dip your cookies in their tears.”

    Yech… sounds a little too salty for me.

    I soooooo want a sample of Eau de Schadenfreude, though!

  41. Ichthyic says

    It’s sad that my Mom’s best friend, who was from Minnesota and left long ago for CA, did not quite live to see this day. She would have been very proud of her birthplace, I’m sure of it.

  42. Erp says

    As others have pointed out the sin of Sodom and Gomorrah according to the Bible was being harsh to strangers and the needy. Jewish midrash (later stories expanding on the Bible) goes into a bit more detail which gives an idea of how Jews perceived the Bible story. For instance according to one story, Sodom not only was filled with people who individually didn’t care for the poor and the stranger but even passed a law making it a crime to help the poor and the stranger (shades of certain places making it a crime to give any help to an undocumented alien or feed the homeless).

  43. lexie says

    Congratulations Minnesota! Also Congratulations to America for nearly 25% of states recognising all couples!!!!

    Maybe one day my country will join you in the 21st century :(

  44. unclefrogy says

    the last nail in the coffin of my faith was the contradiction between the love of jesus this god of love and the loathing bigotry and self hating hypocrisy of the rest of the teachings.
    I find it hard to trust the religious very much.

    in less than 50 years marriage equality will have been the idea of the good christian churches
    uncle frogy

  45. thumper1990 says

    @Chigau #5

    How come Gomorrah never got a ‘sin’ named after it?

    Not a sin so much as a consequence of sin… Gomorrhea :)

    [For the spell-checking types, the typo is deliberate]

  46. David Marjanović says

    Nate Silver gives it until 2020, albeit with appropriately large error bars:

    Nate Silver and Chuck Norris once had a fight.

    Even Nate Silver couldn’t predict the result.

    Gomorrah’s sin was excessive pride. Its punishment was NOT getting a sin named after it.

    Full of win.

  47. Worldtraveller says

    Congratulations Minnesota! 12 down, 38 to go? Doesn’t sound so bad. :)

  48. Rieux says

    Party (with Gov. Dayton, signing the marriage equality bill) on the Capitol steps in St. Paul at 5:00 central, everybody!

  49. anchor says

    I concur with Worldtraveller: Congratulations Minnesota!

    I wish neighboring Wisconsin and other states roundabouts could come to a similar mind…that eminently right thing to do will never happen with that cursed governor Walker though…