It’s a ridiculous myth that sharks have magical properties that prevent cancer, but it’s not true: sharks do get cancer. Furthermore, even if they did have low rates of cancer, grinding them up and powdering them and tossing them into your gut for chemical breakdown would no more cure your cancer than it would turn you into an unstoppable ferocious eating machine with gills.

Add them to the long list of species being exterminated on the altar of sympathetic magic.