Prognostication Poll for Palin


This poll misses a golden opportunity.

What do you think Sarah Palin should do next?

Run for president.
46%
Run for some other office.
5%
Continue speaking as private citizen.
10%
Something else.
40%

“Something else”? But what? I can imagine lots of things I’d like to see Sarah Palin do…like get an education, or join the circus, or get eaten by wolves.

If you answer “Something else”, I think you’ll just have to expand on your answer here.

Comments

  1. aplaceinthestar says

    I’m sure I’m not the only one who would very much like to see her FOD.

  2. Lorence says

    I vote “Something else”, specifically, become a quiet, reclusive private citizen so that we don’t have to hear her screeching any more.

  3. Brownian, OM says

    I vote she gets an education. Like say a master’s in ‘getting eaten by wolves.’

  4. Janine, Mistress Of Foul Mouth Abuse, OM says

    Find a cozy cave and move in. And learn how to hunt wolves without the aid of a helicopter.

  5. Bill Dauphin, OM says

    I note for the record that “Spontaneous Human Combustion” doesn’t seem to be on the list.

  6. cervantes says

    She’s already joined the circus.

    She could actually learn how to shoot a rifle and hunt moose. (According to Levi she doesn’t know which end of the gun to hold.)

    She could become the “Turkey Whisperer.”

    She could become an evolutionary biologist.

  7. JD says

    If she does become an adult film actress, a certain type of bagging will be par for the course.

  8. obscura_max says

    I like the “get eaten by wolves” option. Unfortunately they’d probably be killed despite their great service to the world.

  9. Givesgoodemail says

    15 run for president
    1 run for other office
    4 private citizen
    80 something else

    Amazing how objective and true these polls are.

  10. David B says

    I thought ‘get an education’ too.

    I was thinking of an education in biology, geology and cosmology, but second thoughts, if she did take that on board she might want to talk about it.

    I’m not sure that a spokesperson of her talent would actually be an asset, so second thoughts leave me with STFU.

  11. RichVR says

    She should stick her head so far up her own ass that she eventually disappears in a puff of ignorance.

  12. Sili says

    Grow up.

    Take proper care of her kids – let them live and get edumacated.

    Weld the doors of the clown car shut.

  13. SteveM says

    from the article:

    Speaking for the Liberty and Freedom Foundation, Palin said that she felt very welcome in the Permian Basin.

    I think she meant to say “Permian Era”.

    “STFU” would get my vote also.

  14. https://www.google.com/accounts/o8/id?id=AItOawn01OmbrUbekysrWehp_rdSQyvR_ijS3dQ says

    Yup, I picked “Something else”, and STFU is certainly what I wish she’d do.

  15. BarbieWanKenobi says

    STFU pretty much sums it up for me too.

    84% for something else now…….

  16. Janine, Mistress Of Foul Mouth Abuse, OM says

    MAJeff, are you trying to compare Palin with Yukio Mishima?

  17. Nerd of Redhead, OM says

    STFU is good. Retire back to Alaska, and become a recluse is also good.

  18. rattlehed says

    i was thinking FOaD, but i’d watch her in porn. put something in that mouth to shut her up.

  19. vbalbert says

    If I were for the killing of people because they’re stupid (I’m not because I would be on the list in several places, besides I don’t like murder) I would suggest she go meet God as soon as possible, but I think I like the idea of giving her an education. That said, I don’t think a standard education would be effective. I suggest something in the flavor of A Clockwork Orange.

  20. legistech says

    Instead of just being a hockey mom , start actually playing hockey.

    Or, better yet, pro boxing. Yeah, that’s it… I’d pay to see that.

  21. KOPD says

    I vote for:
    Find an uninhabited portion of Alaska (I don’t know for certain, but I think those still exist), and move there with all your teabagging friends. Secede from the US and form your own country where there are no taxes or government-run services. Build it in a valley near sea-level, by the coast – after all, global climate change is a myth, right?

  22. steve8282 says

    I went with run for President, Over a long campaign she would screw up so many times that Obama would be a lock for term 2.

  23. JohnnieCanuck says

    14% means that 38 people think she should run for president. If I could only be sure that she would lose the election, I’d have considered a strategic vote for her too.

    In the poll that is. Given that I become an alien (!) when I visit the States, I won’t be doing any voting soon, I hope. Palin would be just the sort to unite Alaska with the contiguous states by annexing Canada.

    We really have to make that border less porous. First Asian Carp terrorists and now Palin are sneaking across. Not sure which is worse.

  24. MaleficVTwin says

    If she does become an adult film actress, a certain type of bagging will be par for the course.

    Douchebagging?

  25. https://me.yahoo.com/hairychris444#96384 says

    Maybe she should become a full time medical research volunteer….

  26. Sastra says

    I wonder how she would do as a contestant on Survivor? Probably quite well. Survival skills, physical challenges, social game, lying, wheedling, manipulating, and looking good in a bikini. The impressive ‘older woman,’ catching her opponents offguard and flirting with Probst. She’d finally be fun to watch.

    Ok, I vote her onto the Island.

  27. winters says

    Something else: Sarah Palin and Michelle Bachman drive off into the sunset Thelma-&-Louise style.

  28. legistech says

    Seeing her attempt to become the first woman to swim the Bering Strait would also be rather entertaining.

  29. https://me.yahoo.com/a/eatMaooXuPhfRk8tyfQfiipnaAU-#186bc says

    I voted for something else and that would be to “Do me a favor. Put your lip over your head… and swallow.” Max Goldman, Grumpy Old Men.

  30. Bill Dauphin, OM says

    OK, PZ… I know I can’t really complain (see #7), but you had to know this was going to turn ugly, right? ;^)

    JohnnieCanuck (@33):

    Yah, I wonder how many of the votes for “Run For President” are from people who think her candidacy would guarantee Obama a second term? Or who just think it would be amusing to watch? You have to know that every comedian — left, right, or center — wants her in the race!

  31. MaleficVTwin says

    Lead Texas to secession. Pay liberals to leave first.

    The rest of the country would likely be OK with that. It would also raise the average IQ of the US by around 20 points.

  32. Chuckster says

    Wouldn’t we want her to run? That alone should assure victory by the other side.

  33. Feynmaniac says

    Show she loves Jesus so much that she will take a vow of silence for him. If she really needs to communicate she’ll do so by writing notes on her hand.

  34. hznfrst says

    Winter (#40), she could do Thelma and Louise one better by taking Mann Coulter along for their little skyride.

  35. Feynmaniac says

    Sometimes I think unleashing Palin was McCain’s revenge on the universe for what he suffered…….

  36. Janine, Mistress Of Foul Mouth Abuse, OM says

    Enough of this anti-transgender bullshit, hznfrst.

  37. lunchboxsw.wordpress.com says

    I heard via TMZ that Palin may be putting in to replace Oprah when she ends her show in 2011. … Heaven help us!!

  38. Caine, Fleur du mal says

    hznfrst, you can stop being such an obnoxious assclown now. If you can’t, shutting up will work fine.

  39. Madjik9 says

    I dislike having this annoying douche on my mind in any way shape or form, so my answer is short and very un-original.
    Sarah Palin, PLEASE FUCK OFF.

  40. Krystalline Apostate says

    I’m sure I’m not the only one who would very much like to see her FOD.

    Freight On Delivery?

  41. louis14 says

    I couldn’t vote – the code doesn’t appear on the page for me. Is that a country thing?

    I would have voted for ‘Make a TV series with Richard Dawkins, where she sits and listens carefully as he explains the wonders of reality to her, using only his teaching ability and a few yards of duck tape.’

    I guess that’s ‘something else’.

  42. burnett210 says

    Ms. Palin should go back to Alaska and be a mother to her children. She should also cook a nice meal for her husband. He would probably like a BJ too, which has the added benefit of shutting her up for 10 minutes.

  43. Zeno says

    Ha, ha, ha! She should go to California State University, Stanislaus, next. And she is! (For the university’s 50th anniversary.) I have a good friend there and I’m teasing him about his institution’s leadership choosing Palin (of all people!) to celebrate the birthday of an institution of higher learning. (I should not mock my friend. It wasn’t his decision.)

    The old saying was “Turkeys from Turlock.” The new one will be “Turkey to Turlock”!

  44. Rachel Bronwyn says

    I’d be fine with her just fucking off.

    I can think of numerous other things she could do that would benefit herself and others like stop being an absent parent. Be involved in your special needs child’s life and have “the talk” with your teenagers.

    Ultimately though, for my benefit, she could just fuck off. I`d be pleased with that.

  45. Levi in NY says

    Have a life-changing experience which causes her to lose faith in Christianity and become a flaming liberal.

  46. phydeauxspeaks says

    Current results:

    What do you think Sarah Palin should do next?
    Run for president. 5%
    Run for some other office. 0%
    Continue speaking as private citizen. 1%
    Something else. 94%
    Total Votes: 1344

    Something else…. STFU, as many others have said…. and be forced to actually live the life she’s claimed to live, just to see if she’d survive the first winter.

  47. S says

    Come on PZ, isn’t “eaten by wolves” in poor taste? Seriously, I have no love for her and I know that her tribe is the worst thing USA has produced, but when we say things like that it gives “them” a chance to portray us as malicious and evil.
    My choice would be her getting an education – thats always a good thing, for anybody. Some math, physics, biology, cosmology….just the basics of these, at least.
    And please don’t call me a concern troll.

  48. Kamaka says

    And please don’t call me a concern troll.

    OK. You’re not a concern troll. Really.

  49. JeffreyD says

    I would like to see her involved in a theological argument and take it to a “higher” court. Of course, if there was any real justice she would do something useful with the rest of her life by using a short handled spatula to lift roadkill and moose droppings along the Alaskan Highway.

    I do note that she could make a lot of money for the Reptile party by being a born again, right wing porn actress. (Ouch, my testicles just ascended into my chest in horror.)

  50. https://www.google.com/accounts/o8/id?id=AItOawmVCRS6uKXY5v9-Sl3jMKxcz_Evl55aDck says

    PLEASE let her run for President.

    Free popcorn for all – I promise (and also most of the booze).

  51. Brownian, OM says

    Come on PZ, isn’t “eaten by wolves” in poor taste?

    I would think you’d have to ask the wolves that.

  52. Caine, Fleur du mal says

    Come on PZ, isn’t “eaten by wolves” in poor taste?

    I expect that depends on just how hungry the wolves were.

  53. greg.bourke0 says

    I really do hope that she runs for president, even if I didn’t vote for that option. It would be (pardon the expression) a Godsend, you cannot ask for a better/more incompetent opponent in a presidential election. It would be a foregone conclusion that would force those Republicans with a lick of sense to realise they’ve been backing the party of absolute insanity. If I prayed for stuff, I’d pray for that.

  54. AdamK says

    …the youngest child, whose name keeps eluding me.

    Me, too. Tick? Bic? Truck? Toke? Tiff? Something like that.

  55. S says

    Ok I don’t know how to quote the other comments (someone tell me), but #81 was a witty reply to my comment. However, my point is that stupid ideologies should be conquered by better ones, not by wishing personal harm to their proponents – unless their ideology includes harming others (bin laden, ann coulter).

  56. Shaggy Maniac says

    It would be a foregone conclusion that would force those Republicans with a lick of sense to realise they’ve been backing the party of absolute insanity.

    Don’t be so sure; both Ronald Reagan and GWB were elected. Twice.

  57. Michelle R says

    Come on guys, you just KNOW you want her to run for president. Imagine the hilarity!

  58. Sili says

    I expect that depends on just how hungry the wolves were.

    Well, I guess it is pretty unfair.

    Unless someone gives the wolves some guns and a helicopter.

  59. alistair.coleman says

    See how many times she can bounce a basketball in a year, then try to break that record

    That should keep her off the streets for a while.

  60. IanM says

    But she said that media reports mischaracterized the conservative message as inciting violence.

    “ ‘Take up your arms’ means voting,” Palin said

    “Lock and load, honey, we’re headed to the voting booth!”

  61. Shala says

    Something else: She becomes a 4chan troll.

    What? It suits her intelligence well enough.

  62. Kamaka says

    Ok I don’t know how to quote the other comments (someone tell me)

    See that blockquote thingy down below…that’s the one.

    However, my point is that stupid ideologies should be conquered by better ones, not by wishing personal harm to their proponents

    Palin being eaten by wolves would be most entertaining…besides, it’s natural.

  63. akshelby says

    Yes, Trig is the name of the youngest child. The going theory is that it is short for Trisomy-G, as he has Down’s Syndrome. (Isn’t that just so cute?) ;/

    I vote for her just fucking off and retiring somewhere other than Alaska. We’re really tired of her up here. Really tired.

    If she can’t do that, then I vote for her being eaten by either a polar bear or wolves. Considering her predator control policies, which are still in place, it would be poetic justice.

  64. Janet Holmes says

    Are you kidding, only 4% for “Run for President”? Of course she should run for president!! It would be more fun than the circus and it would expose the Republican party for what it is, morally and intellectually bankrupt.

    I can’t wait for a Palin Presidency run, I lie awake night’s dreamin about it. Of course I’m not from the US, if I was I might feel differently, although considering the looney-tunes that regularly run for office over there maybe it wouldn’t really hurt. Or are you worried she might win? I never thought of that!

  65. Seti says

    I’d like for her to get sued so much she goes seriously bankrupt, loses her house and ends up working three low-paid jobs just to feed her kids. Then get swollen ankles from her six-to-midnight waitressing shift and have to give up work and go on food-stamps, can’t even afford hair-dye or botox any more so she goes all grey and wrinkled. And then gets featured on a “Where Are They Now?” TV special.

  66. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    For something else for Ms. Palin, may I suggest Mr. Ray’s Wig World?

    (First person to get it—aside from RickR who most definitely may not answer—gets a prize of marginal value).

  67. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    The going theory is that it is short for Trisomy-G, as he has Down’s Syndrome. (Isn’t that just so cute?) ;/

    About as cute as Trich, for trichinosis.

  68. akshelby says

    Seti #99:

    I’m changing my vote to your scenario. It’s most excellent.

    Schadenfruede at it’s finest.

  69. Carlie says

    I don’t care what she does, as long as she never shows up on tv, radio, internet, or in newspapers ever again.

  70. MikeyM says

    My favorite quote from the article:

    “I think with the passing of the health care bill, democracy is on the way out,” Biedeger said.

    (“I think with the coronation of Richard the Lionheart, the monarchy is dead,” William of Leeds said.)

    Nothing spells the end of democracy more than a bill being deliberated upon, passed by a majority of both houses, and signed into law by the President.

  71. JeffreyD says

    S at #87 – “However, my point is that stupid ideologies should be conquered by better ones, not by wishing personal harm to their proponents…)”

    As laudable as your sentiments are, and I mean that, not being sarcastic, I am afraid I see someone like Palin as a lost cause. You wish to see her ideologies conquered by better ones. Others have mentioned they would like to see her educated. Problem is all of her followers need educated as well and they share one major point with her, they wish to remain ignorant. I do not believe they can really be reached because they do not want to be. Proposing better ideas will not make a difference, that has been done. They are beyond the pale.

    As for wishing personal harm to her. Well, I would not encourage anyone to harm her. However, I am not a nice person in many ways and think the world would be better with a selective plague or two. Do I wish her pain? Not really. A quick death would be fine. Being struck by lightning while railing against the current administration would be a nice touch. All kidding aside, for her, Gingrich, most of her tea bagging ilk (elk?), proponents of domestic terrorism, etc., to misquote Mark Twain slightly, I wish her no harm, but would pass up all other entertainment to attend her funeral.

  72. https://www.google.com/accounts/o8/id?id=AItOawl1rYlMq3n72hr7d1WxhX-DSmO8zbKd4Bg says

    I vote for FOAD.

  73. Kamaka says

    I don’t care what she does, as long as she never shows up on tv, radio, internet, or in newspapers ever again.

    This thread is just wishful thinking…she ain’t shutting up anytime soon. She holds herself in very high regard. Her spewings in AZ were just played on NPR.

    S @ 75 + 87

    This woman is a theocrat. She believes she is entitled to be in charge because of her “relationship with gawd”. Feeding me to wolves would be kind compared to what she thinks I really deserve…an eternity of torture and torment.

    Google “dominion theology” to get a sense of what she and her ilk have in store for the rest of us.

    And while you’re at it, check out the seventh day adventists…that’s her religious affiliation.

  74. OurDeadSelves says

    However, my point is that stupid ideologies should be conquered by better ones, not by wishing personal harm to their proponents – unless their ideology includes harming others (bin laden, ann coulter).

    Seriously? How are you not a concern troll? You actually took the “eaten by wolves” suggestion seriously??

    Anyway, my “other” is: astronaut. Get her as far away from me as possible, please!

  75. Ströh says

    Anything else. I really don´t care what, just anything. Not that i don’t have a few suggestions:

    – Manned mission to Mars. Not to land, mind you, and not as a member who does something. Just as a member on a solo fly-by mission to test the equipment and effects of long spaceflights on human fysiology. If they turn out to be harmful at least we haven’t wasted anyone important!

    – 10-year mission collecting snow-samples in antarctica. Not as far away, but at least unpopulated. And she would contribute to science!

    – Clearing mines and IEDs in Iraq. Poetic justice, plain and simple.

  76. DominEditrix says

    Please, don’t poison the wolves! Wolves are much nicer creatures than the PalinPolyp!

    I’m in favour of her retiring to her beach-front house and keeping a [quiet] eye on Russia, in order to preserve the safety of our shores. A quiet eye, mind you. Be vewy, vewy quiet, we is hunting Russits!

    Alternately, if she could be set up with a The View-like TV show, sharing the stage with Malkin, Coulter and Bachmann, which would be broadcast from a locked studio, in video only, with subtitles written by Jon Stewart, Stephen Colbert, Margaret Cho and Rachel Maddow – well, I’d go for that. But only from a permanently locked studio.

  77. akshelby says

    the seventh day adventists…that’s her religious affiliation.

    I was under the impression that she’s affiliated with the Assembly of God denomination.

  78. blf says

    Return to whatever planet it came from. I admit to being curious about the colour of the sky there, but am quite happy if “they” just took it back without explaining that detail.

  79. Kamaka says

    I was under the impression that she’s affiliated with the Assembly of God denomination.

    You’re right. All those christers look the same to me.

  80. NoFear says

    “Something else” and to expand:

    Remain silent and appear the fool rather than speak and remove all doubt.

  81. Rorschach says

    Palin is an uneducated brainwashed theocrat who thinks ignorance is a virtue, so do her teabagger friends.She advocates violence with her use of ambiguous language and will undoubtedly have a go at the presidency.

    And if she won, I wonder if the CIA would decide to get rid of her, realising that a loon like her can not be allowed to run the USA.

  82. Mrs Tilton says

    I’m with S @75. Education is good.

    I would like to see Palin go back to university, really buckle down, learn as much as she can about math, physics, biology and cosmology, earn a good degree and then, as she receives her diploma, be eaten by wolves.

  83. gorunnova says

    I was forced to say “Continue speaking as a private citizen” simply because I always find something to snicker at every time I hear her speak.

    The only thing better than a stand-up comedian is a stand-up comedian that doesn’t realize they’re a stand-up comedian.

  84. Newfie says

    get caught on video making fun of the religious idiots that she knowingly fleeces

  85. Nerrin says

    Go away. Disappear. Never darken our national doorstep again. Be not.

    Alternatively, it begins with “S” and ends with “litting her wrists.” I think I could tolerate the “liberal” media bemoaning the loss of such a complete clown– I mean, great thinker, when we get to not hear whatever nonsense her vile little brain has puked up every day.

  86. John Morales says

    Kamaka,

    …that’s her religious affiliation.

    I read that, at first, as “her religious affliction”; I guess because it makes more sense.

  87. SC OM says

    Alternatively, it begins with “S” and ends with “litting her wrists.”

    You’re a laugh riot.

  88. speedweasel says

    She should send her family away on vacation then lock herself in the bathroom with a handgun and a bottle of Jack Daniels and ruminate over her failed political career until a solution presents itself.

  89. Free Lunch says

    She should spend some time learning enough to realize why she is a world-wide joke.

  90. Dust says

    Naked polar bear mud wrestling and porn.

    ‘Cause she is multi-talented.
    =wink wink=

    Also.

  91. Kirk says

    I think she could have a big future as a mature porn star.

    Serious question: does anybody know how her fan base splits regarding gender?

    I think that information is important in helping her decide whether to be a mature hetero porn star, a mature lesbian porn star, or a mature bisexual porn star.

    Regardless, she should seek out non-speaking roles.

  92. Atheist Chaplain says

    Instead of STFU how about she have an epiphany, realise that God doesn’t exist, suddenly start using the parts of her brain that has been left dormant for all these years and become an intelligent, articulate and charismatic speaker for Atheists all over the world.

    After someone cleans up the mess left by the Tea Baggers brains exploding and Bill O’Reilly bursting into flames from self righteous indignation and self immolating, the World will finally realise how wrong it has been for the last 2000 years.
    The Catholic Church will place all the people responsible for committing child rape and abuse as well as all those who took part in trying to hide the odious perpetrators from prosecution, open its vaults to the poor and its secret archives to academia all over the world to study.
    Scientology will be openly mocked in the streets and the human race will burst forward in an era of reason and educated enlightenment.

    Hey!! if I’m going to wish for something that will never happen it may as well be this :-)

  93. Kamaka says

    Regardless, she should seek out non-speaking roles.

    Does “uh uh UH, OH MY GAWD!” count?

  94. Thunderbird 5 says

    Seeing as she believes in so many biological impossibilities, I’d like to see her attempt the anatomically impossible. Live on the Glenn Beck Show.

  95. Crudely Wrott says

    I voted for Do Something Else.

    After watching some video of her and McCain on MSNBC just now, I’m convinced she could work the clubs doing Tina Fey.

    I also think the zippered jacket was on purpose as well as her stand up comic/outraged conservative citizen shtick. Tacky. And darkly hilarious. Her target audience becomes more distinctly defined. Poor ol’ John.

  96. alysonmiers says

    Go to a cabin and pray, Sarah. Go find a nice cozy cabin in the wilderness, where no one except God can hear you, and pray for all our heathen souls until we accept Jesus into our hearts. We’re all counting on you, Sarah! Pray for us! Don’t rest from the praying until we love God as much as you do!

  97. Kirk says

    Does “uh uh UH, OH MY GAWD!” count?

    Excellent question, but I think that would be a difficult speaking role for her. Too many words, although one of them is repeated which makes it easier.

    I’m smiling, though, as I think of her reading it off the back of her hand.

  98. Nerrin says

    You’re a laugh riot.

    Oh, by suggesting suicide, I just meant politically. Y’know, like how she told people to “take up your arms” but meant “vote.” /snark

    Okay, okay, low blow, suicide jokes aren’t cool, I’ve been rude on the internet, etc. I am just so incredibly sick of her. And we’re going to probably be stuck with her for a few years yet, barring her outright death.

    If she gets murdered, no matter the motives or circumstances, she can then be lionized as some martyr to conservatism. If she dies by accident or natural causes before she further self-destructs (politically) or alienates her base (if that’s possible anymore), she gets to stay “golden” forever in their eyes. An actual, honest-to-Bob suicide seems like the most expedient way to let her crash and burn, as long as we can ride out some “driven to suicide” pseudo-martyrdom bullocks for a while afterward.

  99. Paul Macgowan says

    How about “read a book” … no wait how about read lots of books … include a few science ones, get a basic education then maybe she could make a informed contribution to politics.

    Until that time she could go a live in a Cave because she does not want all that “science stuff”

    PS I have posted a mp3 of “Canberra Skeptics in the Pub with PZ” at:

    http://www.mediafire.com/?muin3jzmyy4

  100. reverend.pj says

    My wife suggested Palin should crawl under a rock, and stop using her children as stage dressing.

  101. https://me.yahoo.com/a/DhjBEuJ8pt63x6eBKuPx0Jv9_QE-#7c327 says

    Is it immoral for me to suggest suicide?

  102. Deiloh says

    I want Palin to run for President. Four more years of Obama wouldn’t be so bad.

    Then I would want her to stop focussing on politics and become an advocate for Down Syndrome research. Yeah, she may be a dolt but she could do a lot of good fund raising.

  103. Sioux Laris says

    Learn enough, wherever, that would allow her to speak rationally and reasonably, without lying or exaggerating (except in situations where the humorous intent cannot be misunderstood, even by the pig-ignorant crowds that now lustfully worship her very ordinary ape-descendant body).

  104. Rey Fox says

    “Wouldn’t we want her to run? That alone should assure victory by the other side.”

    Quit saying that. All of you. That’s the attitude that got us Reagan. And Bush. It CAN happen here.

  105. OnePumpChump says

    One more vote for porn. I might check it out for curiosity, but I don’t think I could jack it to Mrs. Palin. But damned if every male Teabagger wouldn’t be working it to a bloody stump if she did even softcore.

  106. thehumanmichael says

    she should get her tubes tied. then maybe go “into the wild” style and look for a magic bus to live in.

  107. cuco3 says

    I think that “something else” is fine, if we take it to mean “none of the above”.

  108. Dave Dell says

    Absolutely, she should run for president. Anything to have the wingnuts waste their money. I tell my ex-father in law, “If you think she’s so great, make out that $2,000 check and send it to her.” No money going out the door yet.

  109. mtgap.wordpress.com says

    There are plenty of things that it would be nice if Sarah Palin did, but “nothing” is also a very intriguing option.

  110. subbie says

    MILF porn.

    Not for me, personally. Although I recognize that she’s an attractive woman, for some reason she just doesn’t do it for me. Apparently I’m more a brains than boobs guy, I guess. I’m only thinking of the joy she could bring to others.

    As an aside, who is this Saint FU that so many of you are speaking of?

  111. chuckgoecke says

    I also vote for pron, but something specific. Larry Flynt produced a film called “Nailing Palin” back in 2008, with a very pretty and convincing actress. She should go to Larry and ask him to reshoot it with the real thing. I’ve heard there’s a funny exchange from near the beginning. Two Russian soldiers have their big SUV (I guess its like a Russian Hummer) break down near the Palin home. They knock on the door and ask to use the phone. Sara lets them in and asks them who they are going to call, and one says with a heavy Russian accent, “The KGB”. Sara airheadedly asks, “Whats that.” He responds, rolling his eyes, “The tow truck”.

  112. Trouble says

    Whatever she should do, it would be preferable not to have a list of tacky sexist stereotypes to choose from. Porn? Be a proper mom? Seriously? Surely a bunch of people with a taste for science and reason can do better.

    I can’t believe my first ever blog comment on Sarah Palin is doing anything like defending her, but still. Retire to quiet oblivion, get an education in critical thinking, start a charity for teenage mums; not this other crap.

  113. S says

    Hey #105:

    And please don’t call me a concern troll.

    Then don’t act like one.

    I didn’t!

  114. Tom Coward says

    Please please please let her run for President! Pretty please with sugar on let the Repubs actually nominate her. That should finish her and them off for the next 40 years or so.

  115. Kirk says

    Tom Coward:

    I hope you are right.

    But I think it’s likely you are wrong. Don’t underestimate the power of mass stupidity. This whole thing is very dangerous.

  116. Trouble says

    Speedweasel – not concerned at all. If I were a concern troll I’d witter on about how it makes the community look bad or gives the other side ammunition. It does both, but that’s not my point.

    If you can’t critique obnoxious behaviour in a movement you support (long time reader, first time commenter) without being accused on concern trollery, then where can you? I don’t like sexism when it comes from what I think of as my side of a debate. I expect it from fundie conservatives who don’t think women belong in the public sphere. I can’t be bothered paying them the compliment of rational opposition is all. I concede that charging in with it on your first post somewhere tends to trigger people’s bullshit detectors, but till now, I figured that “me too” wasn’t sufficiently interesting to contribute.

  117. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    @Trouble:

    If you can’t critique obnoxious behaviour in a movement you support (long time reader, first time commenter) without being accused on concern trollery, then where can you?

    You’re exactly right, and if we can’t reflect on/critique our own, we’re in bad shape. Too many “movements” defend their tribe at any cost, and it’s destructive.

    On the other hand, people draw lines in different places. To some of us who’ve been involved with outspoken atheism for quite a while, we’re very tired of being told to be on our best behavior all the time. When someone comes in and says, “that’s low humor, and you’ll win more friends with dispassionate argument,” it often sounds like:

    a. Good grief, we’re never allowed to let our hair down like normal people and just have a belly laugh

    b. We have to be “proper” all the time, and can’t indulge in humor (and yes, sometimes immature humor)

    c. The critic has no awareness of the amount of time and effort we spend actually attacking substance, so is too quick to pick an irreverent moment out of its context and scold us

    I think it’s understandable why this gets tiresome, and why some of us have a hair trigger (admittedly, yes, that hair trigger can lead us in the wrong direction, but it’s not completely unjustified).

    I get that S sincerely didn’t mean to be a concern troll. And yes, some of us Pharyngulites are so primed to see concern trolling (remember, we have to fend off the Chris Mooney’s of the world constantly, even when we’re not doing anything that controversial) that we can jump the gun.

    But I do think S’ reaction, and the reaction against it, are understandable if we look at the broader picture and try to step into each other’s shoes.

    Note – I’m not defending the out-of-line nasty sexism against Palin that’s happened in this thread. I’m only talking about what appears to me to be an overreaction to PZ’s original “eaten by wolves.” And honest to Pete, that’s the sort of mild humor you’d see on any comedy show poking fun at the affectations of political figures. It’s really, really not over the top.

  118. tsg says

    Hey #105:

    And please don’t call me a concern troll.

    Then don’t act like one.

    I didn’t!

    Really? Let me check again:

    Come on PZ, isn’t “eaten by wolves” in poor taste?

    Complaint about the tone. Check.

    Seriously, I have no love for her and I know that her tribe is the worst thing USA has produced,

    Claim to be on the same side. Check. Waiting for the “but”…

    but

    There it is! Here comes the concern:

    when we say things

    Who’s “we”? You got a mouse in your pocket?

    like that it gives “them” a chance to portray us as malicious and evil.

    and how it hurts “the cause”.

    My choice would be her getting an education – thats always a good thing, for anybody. Some math, physics, biology, cosmology….just the basics of these, at least.

    and the barely veiled appeal to “civility”. The only thing your missing is “sometimes I’m ashamed to call myself an atheist”.

    Sorry, this is not only concern trolling, it is textbook example concern troll. You could teach classes. And that you preemptively “not a concern troll”-ed means you knew it.

  119. Caine, Fleur du mal says

    Josh, OSG:

    I’m only talking about what appears to me to be an overreaction to PZ’s original “eaten by wolves.” And honest to Pete, that’s the sort of mild humor you’d see on any comedy show poking fun at the affectations of political figures. It’s really, really not over the top.

    Exactly. And a good part of the joke there is Palin’s own actions, involving helicopters and high powered rifles, towards wolves.

  120. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    And a good part of the joke there is Palin’s own actions, involving helicopters and high powered rifles, towards wolves.

    It sure enough is, and that should be obvious to anyone, which is why I’m slightly less sympathetic to S than I might be, but I’m trying to strike a balance.

  121. speedweasel says

    Trouble, I deliberately didn’t use the term ‘Concern Troll’ because I see a difference between being concerned (boring) and being concerned to the point of trolling (annoying).

    Josh, Thank you for elaborating on the exact position that I hold with respect to many of the ‘concerned citizen’ toned posts we get whenever any of us get a little flippant or generally start to display humour.

    You nailed it, welcome back ;)

  122. Josh, Official SpokesGay says

    You nailed it, welcome back ;)

    I’m trying to do less “caustic angst,” Mrrrm. . .:))

  123. Caine, Fleur du mal says

    Josh, OSG:

    but I’m trying to strike a balance.

    And you’re doing a fabulous job. Just imagine what Colbert or Stewart would do with this material. I imagine “get eaten by wolves” would the very least of it. ;D

  124. Usyless says

    Would ‘going gently into that good night’ be too harsh? Probably. So, like the 18th Century wife she so wishes to be, let her be seen, not heard.

  125. ChrisD says

    Remember when that Psalm about a world leader “going away” was used in reference to what Christians should pray for?

    The desire for death was wrong then and it’s wrong now.

  126. Shala says

    I retract my previous “something else” in favor of Palin becoming a World of Warcraft zombie.

  127. S says

    Hey tsg at #175:

    All those points in your checklist show that I expressed concern. There is a difference between expressing concern and being a concern troll. Since you seem unable to grasp it, for reasons I will not speculate upon, let me explain:

    People express concern for all sorts of reasons. Not all do, not all need to do, some do, and it it is mostly out of a desire to improve the community or movement they love being a part of. You know, being in earnest, and acting in good faith? Ever heard those phrases?

    A concern troll is one who expresses concern repeatedly to derail an otherwise interesting discussion, and with no higher motive.

    Expressing mild frustration does not make me a frustration troll. Expressing fascination doesn’t make me a fascination troll. Expressing incredulity does not make me an incredulity toll, so here goes: How is it that someone literate enough to read this blog needs things explained to him or her so patiently?

    “Barely veiled appeal to civility?” You got me there. And the reason I pre-emptively concern trolled is that I knew there would be a loser who would write a long complaint (complaint trolling?) about anyone who criticizes even a tiny aspect of the community (not a mouse, I think even you know what community I’m talking about) we all feel part of when we come here. You proved me right.

    No comments on that “ashamed of being an atehsit” jibe. Just unnecessary provocation that only a troll would respond to.

    To everyone else: I am not American, and I did not get the humorous part about the wolves. I wasn’t suggesting that we (yes tsg, there is a “we”) should never let our hair down. Sorry if it seemed so.

    If I were a troll I would keep this going, but since I am not, I will not write on this again. Oh and yes, I will continue to express sincere concern occasionally. I think it’s a good thing to do. Hear that, tsg?

  128. Caine, Fleur du mal says

    S:

    A concern troll is one who expresses concern repeatedly to derail an otherwise interesting discussion, and with no higher motive.

    Wrong. You are valiantly attempting to justify your concern trolling, but that’s exactly what you were doing. People took it very easy on you, in spite of what you might think. If you had actually gotten the humour involved, it wouldn’t have been central to your concern.

    Mentioning a “higher motive” is a concern troll tactic. You have not moved on from the “I’m concerned” motif, you keep defending it. This also is the mark of a concern troll.

    You didn’t want to be labeled, I get it. That doesn’t mean you weren’t being (and still are being) a concern troll. We see more than our fair share of them here, so it’s a bit silly to tell tsg (or any other regular) he doesn’t know what he’s talking about.

    Bye now, and when you stop by in the future, try to lose the constant concern over tone. It doesn’t go over so well.

  129. Ichthyic says

    Please please please let her run for President! Pretty please with sugar on let the Repubs actually nominate her. That should finish her and them off for the next 40 years or so.

    strangely enough, that’s very close to the same thing many of us said when W ran against Al in 2000.

    …and again when he ran for re-election.

    *sigh*

  130. Caine, Fleur du mal says

    Ichthyic:

    strangely enough, that’s very close to the same thing many of us said when W ran against Al in 2000.

    …and again when he ran for re-election.

    I remember all too well. It’s the one reason I will not, for any reason, suggest supporting that brainless god zombie for a presidency run. The situation as it stands is much too dicey, and I’d really rather not see my later years in life as nothing more than an attempt to survive Idiocracy with minimal damage.

  131. chrstphrgthr says

    Not the most popular option expressed so far, but I am not the first: Suicide. It’s my default suggestion for most politicians, pundits, religious leaders, fear/hate mongers, sowers of injustice, etc.

    The idea of being a mother to her children is almost right (the implications are insulting, for sure), but I would rather children, in general, weren’t raised by people like Palin. Her children need to be disillusioned with her kind as fast as possible. Hopefully their mother’s absence speeds their jading.

    If my wish were to come true, I would prefer televised suicide, preceded by apologies for and renunciations of all she has claimed to stand for. Tears, lots of tears and gasping sobs and then… um… Anyway, another guaranteed failure at presidential politics isn’t a bad idea, either. The hilarious outcome of which hopefully encouraging her to end it all, publicly.

  132. Caine, Fleur du mal says

    chrstphrgthr:

    Not the most popular option expressed so far, but I am not the first: Suicide.

    What was I thinking when I wished she would simply sink into obscurity!

    Thanks to such simpletons as yourself, chrstphrgthr, we end up dealing with concern trolls. Honestly, think for two seconds before you put your fingers to keyboard. Some idiocy does not need expression.

  133. Al B. Quirky says

    President Palin. It just sounds so… right!

    “There’s such an appreciation here for your freedom,” Palin said.

    What a honey!

  134. Rorschach says

    I know it upsets SC more then myself, but she is right, an ugly thread, and predictably so I guess.To all the suicide and pron advocates, go kwok yourself sideways with a Leica rangefinder.

    Not the most popular option expressed so far, but I am not the first: Suicide. It’s my default suggestion for most politicians, pundits, religious leaders, fear/hate mongers, sowers of injustice, etc.

    In that case you, dear Sir/Madam, are an asshole.

    strangely enough, that’s very close to the same thing many of us said when W ran against Al in 2000.

    Exactly.I think it is irresponsible to wish for her to run, there is a pool of at least 40% of the population in the US that would almost certainly vote for her, +/- 20% of undecideds, so this could go very very wrong.

    And fwiw, I didn’t see the tone concern trolling claimed above.He thought one term was in bad taste, that’s not concern trolling.

  135. Janine, Mistress Of Foul Mouth Abuse, OM says

    It is official. Al B. Quirky is an idiot.

    What you call a quirk is just foolishness.

  136. Monty Burns says

    I’d like to see her in the next edition of the popular porn video series Batshit Crazy Christian MILF Does Alaska. I think the next one is #117. Look for it soon at your neighborhhood adult video store.

  137. Caine, Fleur du mal says

    Janine, MOFMA, OM:

    It is official. Al B. Quirky is an idiot.

    There are a lot of idiots in this thread. They keep on coming out of the woodwork.

    As for Palin’s notion of freedom, it involves a great many other people being dead or locked up.

  138. Perplexed says

    There are a lot of idiots in this thread. They keep on coming out of the woodwork.

    Hmmm idiots being drawn to Palin sounds about right. Oh dear I may have just proved myself to be one of them, she is just too astounding to ignore. Here is the latest example of her brilliance I have encountered

    “He who has actually proposed some solutions the Obama Administration does not want to listen to Senator McCain or any other Republican and that of course leads to a greater problem that we have in Washington DC and it’s that lack of the new Administration’s ability and enthusiasm for listening to those on the other side of the aisle who have some good solutions that they want considered”

    I think that’s her position on immigration but who knows.

  139. Caine, Fleur du mal says

    Janine, MOFMA, OM:

    Caine, I am sure that you are also witchy.

    Oh yes. I certainly wouldn’t survive one of La Palin’s little witch hunts. Or one of her demon hunts, devil hunts or evil liberal hunts.

    You can guess that this is coming.

    Mmmm. Yes.

  140. Caine, Fleur du mal says

    Perplexed:

    Hmmm idiots being drawn to Palin sounds about right.

    That’s certainly true enough. It’s not just those idiots though; it’s also the idiots in this thread who think Palin should commit suicide, run home and be a mommy, etc. If you can’t find the brainpower to mock and dismiss her without calling for death, mommyism or porn, then you have no call attempting to mock in the first place. (Not that you’ve done that at all – you did it right, by using her own words as dismissal and mockery.)

    She is like watching the proverbial trainwreck whenever she opens her mouth; it’s hard to ignore such a stupendous lack of thought.

  141. defides says

    Lots of possibilities popped into my head.

    Make her an ambassador – I think she could learn a lot in a Moslem country.

    Make her work for a year or two in a caring profession – if you don’t have them over there she could become a UK social worker – dealing all the time with people who are too stupid to clean up the rubbish and detritus from their own living room floor.

    Or give her a job in whichever branch of the US administration is responsible for enforcing CITES – after seeing the evidence of what brutally uncaring animal smugglers can do to beautiful, rare and helpless animals, she might re-think her approach to wildlife.

  142. rons says

    It is clear she has no empathy for anybody or any thing less fortunate than she is. Suicide is really not an option, she couldn’t figure out either how to pull trigger or how to take the pills. She is eminently qualified to be a crash-test dummy. Alternatively, an undercover agent to infiltrate a white-slave ring.

  143. God says

    “I love her,” said Shelly Rollins of Midland, who was hoping to get an autographed copy of Palin’s book Going Rogue. “She reminds me of me.”

    I love both Sarah Palin and Shelly Rollins because they remind Me of Me.

  144. Joe Fogey says

    I too am for spontaneous human combustion. With all that hot air, it should be easy.

  145. John Morales says

    Ah well, might as well join in.

    I’d quote Catherine Aird: “If you can’t be a good example, then you’ll just have to serve as a horrible warning.”

    I’ve liked that one since I first encountered it. :)

  146. brotheratombombofmoderation says

    I was trying to think up something snarky involving Sarah Palin, Lisa Ann (porn actress who played Palin in the Hustler parody), and Tina Fey but I think Tina said it best:

    They recently made a porn movie, this is true, about Sarah Palin, and then the same adult actress, Lisa Ann, played me in a porn parody of ‘30 Rock.’ Weirdly, of the three of us, Lisa Ann knows the most about foreign policy. But I know the most about three-ways.

    http://mediadecoder.blogs.nytimes.com/2009/11/19/at-ad-council-dinner-tart-humor-from-tina-fey/

    My wishes for Sarah Palin are two-fold:

    (1) She should develop her education and intellect where they are consistent with her ambition.

    (2) After having one of her childen come out as gay, she becomes the most passionate and dedicated PFLAG (Parents, Families, and Friends of Lesbians and Gays) mom in Alaska where she puts her folksy charm to work making the world a better place for her gay child and everyone else.

  147. Aquaria says

    Palin’s a fundie nutbag, so she should live by their rules-what’s she doing being in a position of authority over any man? She believes that all of us should go home and take care of babies. Well, you first, Sarah.

    Fucking hypocrite.

  148. Aquaria says

    Oh, and I can’t believe anyone has to explain the eaten by wolves thing, after Palin bragged about shooting wolves from a helicopter.

    It’s called poetic justice, concern twits.

  149. chuckgoecke says

    As one of those who put forth a crass sophomoric pron wish for Palin, I am truly sorry. It is an awful stereotype to inflict on beautiful women anywhere, no matter what their background, that they might be as dumb as Sarah Palin. While I’m apologizing, I wish to wag a finger at all who wished her being eaten by wolves. This is a crass and inaccurate stereotype of wolves. As if they would actually eat a person, no matter how tasty they may look, and that they would be petty enough to hold a grudge against someone simply because they were mercilessly aerially hunted by them.

  150. Peter Henderson says

    “Something else”? But what?

    Definitely a TV reality show. Somthing like what Katie Price (aka Jordan) has doen on TV over here. “What Sarah did next” has a nice ring to it . Huh ?

    Maybe not.

  151. shonny says

    So trying to sell you guys shares in
    PALIN FOR PRESIDENT INC. would be a waste of time?

    Not that I would buy any, but seeing the mass hysteria in the US before, during, and after the signing of the health bill, who knows?
    Nutty as fruitcakes, except fruitcakes are not armed, usually.

  152. Ing says

    No one else is mentioning it?

    Ok….The Trig=Tri-G is not true. Or at least VERY unlikely to be true. No record of medical jargon or slang I’ve found has had TriG mentioned PRIOR to the story. The story was made by the Huffington Post (And we all know they never bullshit). I hate Palin, I assure you. But I think Trig if anything is short for TRIGGER, as you know…they’re whiter than an albino in a blizzard. It’s not likely the kid’s named after the condition he has. Let’s keep our valid snarky and nasty remarks reality based.

    That said, I go for something else..>Appear on Colbert…and CRY. I want to see Captain America rip her to shreds.

  153. Carlie says

    This is a yahoo headline right now: “Palin to tea party rally: Don’t sit down, shut up”

    Oh, how I wish the grammar used in that sentence actually reflected her message.

    Palin has made it clear several times that her children were all named after the towns in which they were conceived. That’s already ridiculous and crass enough that I really don’t think anyone needs to make up anything else.

    *My participation in this thread in no way should be considered an endorsement of any statements wishing harm to Palin, as I only want her to STFU.

  154. Gregory Greenwood says

    Increasingly it is not simply the illogical, paranoid rubbish that pours from Palin’s cake-hole that depresses me, rather it is the fact that anyone who displays such willful, crass ignorance should possess such relatively high stock with such a substantial cross section of the American populous. Despite repeatedly demonstrating her staggering ignorance of the major issues of the contemporary world and leaving her woo-fueled anti-scientific bias on permenant display, she is still one of the most popular public figures in modern day America (though she is, to be fair, also one of the most reviled among liberals)

    Leaving aside her uncomfortably close brush with real power and her inveterately corrupt and incompetent governorship of Alaska, she has since become the oft hailed ‘darling of the right’, who still has significant influence over the opinions of millions and has made vast sums of money through the publishing of her biography and the general whoring of her (doubtless heavily embroidered) experiences during the last Presidential election.

    Palin is living proof that in modern America gross stupidity and extreme religion bordering on a personality disorder are no bar to wealth, success and power.

    Still, I suppose no one has ever seriously accused the Republican party of being a meritocracy.

  155. Peter B. says

    Do an explicit nude spread for Hustler before disappearing entirely. As long as she succeeds in the latter, I don’t even care if she attempts the former, but it sure would amuse many of the commenters above.

  156. Ing says

    I might point out that all this bullshit about health care by republicans…what we got was more or less a WEAKER version of what they offered up (but never delivered) as an alternative to Hillarycare in the 90s.

  157. Rey Fox says

    “Palin has made it clear several times that her children were all named after the towns in which they were conceived.”

    Not according to what I found on Google. Citation, please.

  158. DexX says

    She could join a circus where she would be educated in the finer points of being eaten by wolves.

  159. Bill Dauphin, OM says

    I agree with Josh OSG (et al.) both that we need to make a little space for jokes, even if they might be a bit outre, and that we might be a bit hypersensitized around here on the concern troll issue.

    That said, I also agree with SC, Rohrschach, et al., that this thread has taken a seriously ugly turn. And the thing is, the deeply ugly end of the spectrum tends to drag down the jokes that otherwise might get by as merely edgy with it. My own comment, about spontaneous human combustion, [a] clearly couldn’t be taken by an audience of <>skeptics as a real threat; [b] involved a sort of cosmic, karmic retribution, rather than violence done to Palin by any person (including Palin herself); and [c] was not related to gender or sex. I think it was pretty defensible (and funny)… and yet, as the thread has played itself out, I find myself regretting having said it, because in the context of some deeply ugly stuff, I feel ugly about what I said, too.

    Threads often seem to take a special turn for the ugly when the subject of our (perfectly well earned) derision happens to be a physically attractive woman¹. Somehow, when the ideas we hate are embodied in a beautiful woman2, otherwise decent, compassionate people seem to feel empowered to move their rhetoric in the direction of sexual degradation and sexualized violence.

    The stuff involving porn or sex acts (e.g., the suggestion that Palin should give Todd a BJ, because that would at least shut her up for a little while), in particular, is more than a little bit disquieting to me, because they seem to be equating sex and sexuality3 with degradation and punishment, and that pernicious social meme is one of my very largest pet peeves.

    Look, I’m a non-dead heterosexual male. I agree with Ron White that “once you’ve seen one woman naked… you pretty much want to see the rest of ’em naked.” Sarah Palin is, in purely physical terms, more than average attractive, and I have no doubt I’d find a film of her having sex arousing… but fer criminy’s sake, please stop trying to tell me that such a film — or any other sexual scenario involving her — would have anything to do with her “getting what’s coming to her.” That’s not only degrading to Palin and to women generally, it’s also inappropriately dismissive of human sexuality per se.

    ¹ Yes, I’m including *nn C**lt*R here. If you saw a picture of her without knowing who she was or what she stands for, most of you would rate her as at least “attractive” by the standards we normally apply to People Famous for Something Other Than Being Beautiful&copy: It’s her ideology that’s hideous, not her face or body; deal with it.

    2 Or a beautiful man, for that matter. The embedded sexism of our society ensures that we notice women’s looks far more easily (and the notice we take is often more vicious), but good-looking men in politics (e.g., Dan Quayle and, more recently, Scott “Nude Model” Brown) do occasionally come in for some extra commentary/criticism.

    3 There is no truth to the rumor that Sex and Sexuality is the title of a recently discovered unpublished Jane Austen manuscript! ;^)