Which should I be more worried about: this not-safe-for-work-but-flattering fantasy, or the fact that I was informed about it by Phil Plait, who must be searching the web for “PZ Myers tag team fantasy”.
My wife isn’t going to let me travel any more, either.
I would be much, much more worried about the former. Just saying.
PZ! You so totally scored, dude!
Hmph. How come I never get groupies?
Awww. Phil must be heartbroken.
Except, of course, that Phil gets to go on a cruise with me in August.
I’m also realistic. I know I can only be attractive in the abstract.
Proof (if any were needed) that atheism leads to immorality and lewd behavior. Fire up the ovens, honey, I foresee another holocaust soon.
PZ? You’ve graduated to the groupie-stalker club.
I thought you were in this business just for the groupies.
Who lives? Cthulhu?
I call Poe’s Law on that one.
Just in case go take your wife to dinner. It’s not your fault but it can’t hurt.
@#5 BecauseHeLives —
Hopefully, you’re a Poe.
If not, you desperately need to get a sense of perspective. Lewd sexuality does not lead to killing people.
Are you one of those “Pink Swastika” nutjobs too?
I followed the link and laughed out loud. Also, followed a tip from them to http://midwestteensexshow.com which I flat out love. My youngest is already 21, but advising all my kids, even the 30 year old, to view this site. I hope it is still around when my grand children are old enough to need it.
Ciao, y’all
Biologists get all the girls. Everyone knows that.
“I know I can only be attractive in the abstract.”
Naw, I think you are most attractive in Materials And Methods.
Embarrassing for you that she thinks a grey haired (perhaps slightly balding) old man like Dawkins is more attractive though.
Number 2 to Dawkins?
Must be that uber-suave accent of his.
PZ Myers, the Avis of rockstar biologists.
Well, Dawkypoo is well sexy.
Speaking of virtual worlds, was there ever a play-by-play for those of us who’re too oldfangled to visit 2nd Life?
“Naw, I think you are most attractive in Materials And Methods.”
I thought you had to be attractive before the introduction? The abstract seems the better place for attractiveness. ;D
if only…
I think you have to be famous.
Brownian, OM: Hmph. How come I never get groupies?
Hey! Aren’t you the one getting fan mail from Marisa Tomei?
Hmph. I don’t want to hear a thing from you! ;-)
Not to rain on anyone’s hypothetical parade, but this smacks of cult-of-personality.
Weirdness.
And the people I’ve met who really are like that, scare the shit out of me…
Not the brightest crayons in the box…
Biologists get all the girls.
—–
Brownian, OM: Hmph. How come I never get groupies?
Shit. Try being a sociologist.
OK, admittedly, I’m not really interested in the girls. But sociology is not the place to go for groupies. Hell, one of the things I used to love about queer activist conferences was the opportunity for a fun weekend hookup. I wouldn’t even sleep with any sociologists–we’re not an attractive group.
The only groupie I’ve ever had was completely off limits. A fellow student of his, someone I had known for a couple years, informed me that he had joined the class because of a crush on me. Of course, undergrads are off limits–and even if they weren’t they tend to be too young and silly–so I wouldn’t go there, but he wasn’t even a cute undergrad.
“My wife isn’t going to let me travel any more, either.”
To regain your mobility you might introduce your wife to any of the better chastity belt manufacturers. They’re not just for ladies any more.
Given a choice go for the silk lined models. The silky stimulation almost makes up for the confinement and greatly reduces the amount of chaffing. A desirable result, assuming your not into the masochism.
Note to self: Become a prominent evolutionary biologist and atheist writer/blogger.
This whole thread is starting to reek of Too Much Information.
Aw get over it, Spinoza. Obviously you’ve never been a teenage girl.
I’ll give the kid points for taste. Also for a new-to-me term: “Eiffel Tower.”
just tell ’em you’re a cephelapod in disguise and cross-species fertilization attempts don’t work too well.
whaddya expect, PZ, after all, everyone of your stature gets groupies. its a price — or fringe benefit — of the shtick, don’t ya know.
;-)
Eiffel Tower? Gad, I feel old, anyone know what that is?
…
Mike:
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=eiffel+tower
Eiffel Tower? Gad, I feel old, anyone know what that is?
http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=eiffel+tower
I can only hope that Skatje doesn’t read this blog.
And, you know at least one smart-alecked UMM student is going to bring this up tomorrow, right?
@#27 Mike —
Also… (see def 2).
Damn! Talk about a morale boost.
Sounds like a kind of female version of the sex fantasies in Woody Allen’s short story “The Whore of Mensa.”
http://members.tripod.com/waitalia/short-uk.html
Dawkins and Myers, definitely; do me some Darwin, trash talk creationism, a little down and dirty on alt med … you both know what us skep-chicks like — just a quick intellectual experience, and then leave.
I wondered if the providence of this were going to come up. In fact, I got a trackback from a site that had that up as a link in the same post.
But alas, poor PZ. He’s Number 2.
Rule 34 strikes again.
PZ? I know you don’t need my advice, being an adult and even older than me, but bring flowers home today. Don’t ask. I once got into trouble with the missus over something she dreamt I did, and this stuff is much more real. So bring flowers. It’s the least you can do.
That sound I just heard. . . I think it was Matt Nisbet’s brain asploding.
In vaguely related news: http://entertainment.slashdot.org/article.pl?sid=08/05/26/2249243
“… Quick! Test out and move the bars on the pretty graph! Can we make Slashdot.org the “Smartest Website in the World?” (It’s curretly number 2 behind ScienceBlogs.com.) …”
PZ Myers (#4):
Coturnix (#13):
You never know when you might become intensely ravishing to a footnote fetishist.
Straight people are crazy. “Eiffel tower”? That’s just a low-grade threesome. No big deal.
I’ll be honest, this woman looks like she might kidnap and rape you, PZ. You better start carrying your pepper spray.
Very funny post.
ROFLMAO
science groupies.
sounds like something out of “Far Side”.
For all the things to be linked for!
If anyone is interested, the more reasonable works from the kids in the video can be found at http://tehjuggernauts.blogspot.com. We are the outspoken atheists in a small BibleBelt college town, and usually the fruits of our labors are a bit more academic.
Still, we will happily take a link from Pharyngula!
-Amber
P.S. Dr. Myers, your wife can rest easy. I have my own atheist to curl up with. =D
Proof (if any were needed) that atheism leads to immorality and lewd behavior. Fire up the ovens, honey, I foresee another holocaust soon.
Kenny? is that you?
Kenny? is that you?
I’ll fire up an oven. I think he’s stink might make my grilled bratwurst funky though.
@#45 Ichthyic —
I don’t know, Kenny doesn’t strike me as the morphing type. He’s proud of his insanity…
OTOH, the content and style of the post are in the vein of The Kenny….
I’ll fire up an oven. I think he’s stink might make my grilled bratwurst funky though.
heh, that reminds me, I finally saw Tim Burton’s “Sweeny Todd” the other night.
gruesome.
not a bad idea, though. Good bit of recycling, even if they apparently needed a better scrubber on their smokestack.
;)
It should also be noted that this video is actually a “outtakes” from the show “Beautiful Flower and Penis”, located at beautifulflowerandpenis.blogspot.com
Beautiful Flower and Penis is an internet sex show that attempts to open up dialogs about sexual issues. We live in a very conservative part of the country, and open conversations about sexual education and health are rare. It is an abstinence-only education culture, where they put child care in the High Schools, but don’t hand out condoms in the Nurse’s Office.
As twenty-somethings who are still in college, talking about sex is the only way we have to fight back against the religious taboos which are being applied to our bodies through laws and legislation. It is the only way we have to normalize the human sexual experience, when all those around us try so hard to chastise us for being humans.
I urge you all to check it out.
It isn’t only me drooling over intellectual brain candy, I promise. =P
Flowers will not save you
“Do not desire her beauty in your heart, Nor let her capture you with her eyelids.”
“For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.
Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,
Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,
Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.”
BecauseHeDrones
“For the flesh lusteth against the Spirit, and the Spirit against the flesh: and these are contrary the one to the other: so that ye cannot do the things that ye would.
Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness,
Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies,
Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God.”
blah blah blah blah blah
(Kenny would never say, “Fire up the ovens, honey.” He’s not that colorful. Really.)
For all the things to be linked for!
We are the outspoken atheists in a small BibleBelt college town, and usually the fruits of our labors are a bit more academic.
That is so funny!
PZ…
You must know that you are considered to be the Fabio of the interweb.
“I can’t believe he’s not Dawkins…”
IDiots don’t have groupies. Damn, PZ – Ben Stein’s panties are really going to be in a twist over this one! ;-)
@#50 BecauseHeLives —
You are way too hung up on the sex thing. Go do yourself a favor and read Song of Songs (aka Song of Solomon, aka Canticles). And then masturbate. For a really, really long time.
It will help, I promise.
Hey there. I’m the producer/director/editor of Beautiful Flower and Penis. Sorry if the video startled you. It’s all in good fun.
Thanks for watching.
And then masturbate. For a really, really long time.
It will help, I promise.
well, he should watch out for chafing…
OTOH, he can using the froth coming out of his mouth for lubrication.
@#49 Amber Culbertson-Faegre —
From one twenty-something college student to another, nice job :). The dichotomy between the acceptability of sexuality and of violence in our society is really bizarre and perverse.
on a similar note, a (fake) picture of adam savage from mythbusters busting the myth of goatse-man has recently surfaced.
“blah blah blah blah blah”
Humperdoo!
Hrm, one of the guys in the videos from the Beautiful Flower show has been blogged about on here before.
I’ve read about this MSU group here and there, especially over at venganza.org. Good job kids. Keep up the good work.
@ Etha #60,
Thank you so much for your vote of confidence!
We are from Springfield, Missouri, which is a ridiculously religious area. The fear of all things sexual has bred a culture where students are threatened with expulsion for handing out condoms in the high schools, and STD testing is virtually unavailable.
Our voices are all we have, but living in Springfield sure gives us a lot of opportunities to practice using them. =)
-Amber
Yeah, no kidding. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve had that conversation. Though they themselves may not even be fully aware of it, many parents (I’d guess more than 50 percent) in this country would rather their grade-school child see fictionalized death and dismemberment than fictionalized sex (even fade-to-black-before-anything-really-happens sex) or even something as natural and inoccuous as a momentary baring of a breast. Now try to imagine the number of kids who saw movies like Revenge Of The Sith long before their tenth, eight, or even sixth birthdays. I’m quite sure that it’s way, way more than zero.
Bizarre and perverse. Indeed.
/petpeeve
*innocuous
Fixed that for ya!
Though they themselves may not even be fully aware of it, many parents (I’d guess more than 50 percent) in this country would rather their grade-school child see fictionalized death and dismemberment than fictionalized sex (even fade-to-black-before-anything-really-happens sex) or even something as natural and inoccuous as a momentary baring of a breast.
Or even breastfeeding.
@#65 Kseniya —
This reminds me of an anecdote about the reaction to a female/female kiss shown on Star Trek: Deep Space Nine (the episode was “Rejoined”). Some woman wrote a very angry letter expressing her indignation that two women kissing each other could be aired on TV. In response someone involved in the show (I think Ira Steven Behr) asked if she would prefer to see two women shooting each other. She replied with an unequivocal yes.
Some woman wrote a very angry letter
I wonder if it was this woman:
NOT A CHRISTIAAAANNNAAUGH!
DARK SIDED!
http://www.ebaumsworld.com/video/watch/12753/
Wow. She looked positively evil there for a moment. Funny how that works, isn’t it?
(She did give a good show, though.)
“Do not desire its comfort in your heart, Nor let it capture you with its inanity.”
heh.
that’s about the size of it.
“…for if captured, forever will your destiny be guided by fear.”
This child Amber is charming, adorable and obviously VERY intelligent. Congrats on attracting the best and brightest, PZ. “Beautiful Flower and Penis” is some good work.
But I don’t get this from BecauseHeLives: [do not] “let her capture you with her eyelids.” Yes, I get the Biblical reference, but WTF?
I’ve been complimented on many things, but no one EVER mentioned my eyelids. Is there such a thing as an eyelid fetish?
Eyelids aren’t a sexual characteristic in themselves, but they can be a nonverbal sexual signaling mechanism.
Think “come-hither look”, or “flutter”.
Nanotechnology is the way to go if you’re after science groupies. I’ve only been in this for a year, its nerdy and unsexy in the extreme, and I’ve still already gotten three drunken marriage proposals. good stuff. made my day!
Be sure to submit that to the film festival Randy Olson suggested.
Best evolution recruiting video EVAR.
Yeah, Owl, probably means “bedroom eyes”. But I still think it’s an odd verse to pick if you’re trying to proselytize teh heathen . . .
My wife and I first got together over a dense lithium aluminosilicate, working out the flexibility of the framework in terms of the rigid units :)
Re. the issue of violence versus sexuality in movies: thinking about it, I’m wondering if one of the differences is that seeing violence in movies doesn’t make me want to commit violence, whereas seeing sex in movies does frequently make me want to have sex. The solution is probably much more sex in movies.
Amber, re your #64 and supra, nice site, nice blog, nice work. Hang in there and do the good work. I am an old guy, but unlike many of my contemporaries I see lots of young people that make me feel happy and secure about the way the world is going. I hope you and your colleagues will fare well.
Ciao (you kids get off my lawn!!!) y’all
But I don’t get this from BecauseHeLives: [do not] “let her capture you with her eyelids.” Yes, I get the Biblical reference, but WTF?
Isn’t that what that crazy Christian school in Pensacola called “making eye babies”?
*reads URL* What. O_o
I’m not clicking that!
The headline is right. Only on the Internet. But the important thing is, this is happening somewhere, whereas 20 years ago, it wouldn’t’ve. This means two things. 1) Sex is being discussed more openly. 2) Science is sexier.
Kseniya (#65):
I count myself very lucky that when I was in grade school, my parents let me watch movies like Gandahar, a.k.a. Light Years. A French animated film, whose English-language screenplay was written by Isaac Asimov, and which starred the voices of Penn and Teller — oh, and did I mention that its cultural sensibilities were, well, French?
Blake, I’ve never heard of that one. I wonder if NetFlix has it…?
I don’t think the English-language version has come out on DVD. I found a VHS copy in a bargain bin a few years ago.
Fun? You entice two married men to commit lewd and lascivious acts with a scarlet temptress, a thorn among lilies, a triple breasted Whore of the Interwebs.
That they are fools who deny God and worship Satan does not excuse your wanton behavior.
When you go down on your bended knees before Jesus do not think that your scarlet lips will gayne you admittance to his inner podium.
#86 BecauseHeLives babbled
and
Two of the funniest things I’ve read today (admittedly, the day is still young).
Please tell me you are a Poe? Or maybe it is funnier if you aren’t….
Well I guess if atheism and being a scientist correlate well with intellegence and the brain size, this could be sexual selection…
Oh come on, smart men are stupidly attractive :p
I don’t think I’d like to gayne access to Jesus’ inner podium. Unless it’s true that Jesus was really a woman.
Etha, I think the triple-breasted-whore (a Heinlein ref, I believe) gives the game away. Well done, BecauseHeDrones!
And…
Not entirely off-topic.
Hello All!
Being one of the crazy kids who helped make this video, I just wanted to thank you all for the positive feedback. It’s good to know that you are all having just as much fun watching as we did making this lovely gem!
Oh, and PZ? Don’t be offended that Dawkins is the sexier one…I mean…we all went to see Expelled and got thoroughly turned on by that man’s inability to be pwned. If it makes you feel any better, he is only just *slightly* sexier and we are all still totally and completely part of your fan club.
Have a great day!
Lauren
“Triple-breasted whore of Eroticon Six” is the Hitchhiker’s Guide epithet for Eccentrica Gallumbits, whose entry falls just before Earth’s. Most scholars are of the opinion that the thrice-breasted Martian prostitute in Total Recall (1990) is an allusion to the Douglas Adams story.
Blake, yes, of course you are right! I’s Adams, not RAH. Duh! I’m somehow brain-dead from the weekend. And I didn’t even drink! :-p
I don’t think the trophy wife needs to shorten your leash for this bit of fluff. On the other hand, your poor daughter will no doubt get a hard time over it.
It’s Dawkins accent that blows my skirt up…
Hmm. Accent vs. beard…accent vs. beard…. I’ll have to think about that one for a good long while.
http://www.berm.co.nz/cgi-bin/video/play.cgi?VewbAGR1dow
George Gaynes plays Commandant Eric Lassard in Police Academy – remember the podium scene?
No offense to PZ intended, of course, but I think I’d have to go with the accent rather than the beard. Mmmm, British accent, especially when saying smart things…
Besides, don’t you know that this Dick is un-cock-friggin-blockable? ;-)
A.) I can’t believe I was the first one to reference that.
B.) Actually, now that I look back over my days as an anime fangirl, the whole betentacled-cephalopod concept is… intriguing. I may need to revise my conclusion.
Thanks for saying “not safe for work” right there in the link! And I was about the click on it. Your kindness and thoughtfulness just never ever ends. Can’t wait to click.
Don’t miss the seriously good work being done by these folks:
http://tehjuggernauts.blogspot.com/
“… The good news:
Work of Teh Juggernauts was just linked on PHARYNGULA!
The bad news:
All of the work for atheism and reason that the team does, and we were linked because I jokingly allowed Carly Ann to film me for BF&P ….”
Hey, whatever gets the guy’s attention ….
She wasn’t the best looking girl in the world, but far from the worst. And she’s got enthusiasm for you, and that counts for a lot in the sack. If it weren’t for the whole wife issue, it’d be worth a roll.
gandahar:
http://www.torrentz.com/7a7b504174d00055030f36ff8d9cb2de1703a41d