An Old Guy in the Waiting Room Told a Big Fish Story

I don’t know what it is, but the minute I make eye contact with an old person, they just start talking to me. Today, I had the pleasure of talking to a gnarly old gentleman, here for his wife’s lung cancer treatment, and very concerned about his granddaughter, who enjoys driving while drunk – with her kid in the car.

In one of his lighter moments, he told me a yarn about his trip to Mud Lake.

I don’t know how to get there. I just follow the smell of the fish.

That day, I was fishing so long, I ran out of bait. I went back to the dock and stepped onto land. Right at my feet was a great big rattlesnake with a frog in its mouth.

I knew frogs were great for fishing, so I stepped on the back of the snake’s head and took the frog from its mouth. Then, I wondered how I was going to get my foot off the snake without getting bit, so I reached back into my boat, grabbed my bottle of Jim Beam, and poured it into the snake’s mouth. He laid down and went to sleep, so I got back in the boat and used the frog for bait, catching northern’s and any number of big fish.

The minute I ran out of frog bait, I felt something rub up against my leg. I looked down to see the snake – two frog’s in his mouth, looking up at me.

As I laughed heartily, he reached back for another joke:

Hey! Did you hear how big the one-armed man’s fish was?!

Humanity can be fun, sometimes.


  1. chigau (違う) says

    As an old person, I must say that I am happy that our cardiologist is a couple of years older than Doogie Hawser.
    I think.

  2. says

    his granddaughter, who enjoys driving while drunk – with her kid in the car.

    Get a big insurance policy on the kid’s mom and make sure the kid is always strapped in.

  3. John H. Seidel says

    I heard a longer version of that joke from a biplane pilot while we were waiting for it to be fueled up. He told it in a Southern accent and embellished it a bit. Then we went up and had a great time floating around in the sky. It was a good joke then, and it’s good now. Gotta remember to carry some whisky with me whilst fishing.

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