The JesusWeen Story

I won’t wear a costume this JesusWeen eve—
The lord is my shepherd; I shall not deceive
This holiday’s different for folks who believe
For folks who have Christ as their savior

I won’t be a hero, cos Jesus comes first
I won’t be a villain, cos Satan’s the worst
I won’t ask for candy; the candy’s all cursed
(That’s typical godless behavior)

I’m giving out bibles to trick-or-treat kids
They’re looking for chocolates to quiet their ids
But self-satisfaction, God’s message forbids,
So candy bars surely are sinning

Though Satan is hiding, and wearing a mask,
The godly confront him and take him to task
So each trick-or-treater we simply must ask:
“Is Satan or Jesus Christ winning?”

This JesusWeen, children from all ‘round the block
Will visit our porch, ring the bell (or else knock),
And, getting a bible, will cry out in shock:
Hallelujah! Sing glory of glories!

Cos JesusWeen’s all about Jesus, and love
And gifts that are given by God up above
Cos candy these children are sick to death of…

And other such fictional stories.


  1. Die Anyway says

    I had not heard of this. Must have been too busy playing Angry Birds. But, Digital Cuttlefish to the rescue… now I know. I did and internet search and found out it’s quite popular, or seemingly so. Proponents always make things sound bigger and better than they really are.
    In any case, I’ve grown tired of Halloween. It has become too commercialized, too big, too impersonal. The neighborhood kids don’t come to the house anymore. Their parents take them to church parties (maybe that’s the JesusWeen and I just didn’t know it had a name), the shopping mall, city sponsored festivals, or some such. A couple of years ago I decorated my yard, put on a costume, painted my face, bought a tub full of candy and had like 3 kids come by. I ate the candy and haven’t done that since.

  2. The Ridger says

    It’s sad. Some places everyone is so terrified of poisoned candy or abductions or something that never actually happened, so the kids are trucked off to supervised parties.

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