At most local news


Oh and by the way – it’s completely unimportant, but then again it perhaps led to things that were important, so it might be worth mentioning – the first person Ismaaiyl Brinsley shot was his ex-girlfriend, Shaneka Thompson. He shot her in the stomach.

Nancy Leong at Slate says this is a pattern.

We live in a country where shooting your ex-girlfriend is at most local news.

According to media reports, the management of Thompson’s apartment complex distributed a letter to other residents stating that her shooting was the result of a “domestic dispute” in order to reassure them that “this was a private, isolated incident.” When three women are murdered by their husbands or boyfriends every single day in the United States, domestic violence is just another routine event—merely a landlord-tenant-relations issue of no concern to anyone else.

Of course, later that day Brinsley went on to murder New York police officers Wenjian Liu and Rafael Ramos, so we now know that his shooting of Thompson was no private, isolated incident. The more difficult question is why anyone ever assumed that it was.

Well it’s like this. Brinsley was mad at his own personal ex-girlfriend. That means he’s not going to shoot the rest of us in the stomach, because we’re not his ex-girlfriend. The same applies to all those other private, isolated incidents of domestic violence. All we have to do is not involve ourselves with someone who will shoot us when he gets pissed off, and we’ll be fine.

Too often, our society resists taking domestic violence and other forms of gendered violence, such as stalking and sexual assault, as seriously as other kinds of violence. We need to stop dismissing gendered violence and start learning from the pattern present in one incident after another. Men who engage in violence at home are often men who engage in violence outside the home. And men who devalue women’s lives are, by definition, men who devalue human lives.

And for another reason, too. Women’s lives matter. Even women who aren’t cops or celebrities or important in some way.

And just a few days ago, Man Haron Monis held 17 people hostage for more than 12 hours in a coffee shop in what quickly became known as the Sydney siege, which culminated in the deaths of two hostages as well as Monis. Both during and after the hostage standoff, considerable attention focused on Monis’ Islamic ties and purported religious extremism. Yet far less note was made of his extensive history of violence against women. At the time of the standoff, he was out on bail for charges relating to the murder of his ex-wife, whom he had also threatened and stalked, and he had been charged with more than 40 sexual assault offenses dating from 2000 and allegedly involving seven different women. As Clementine Ford aptly observed, this information “paint[s] an incredibly disturbing picture of someone with a deep and aggressive hatred for women.” Yet this disturbing pattern of violence against women apparently failed to raise the kind of red flags that would have led to confinement—or at least closer supervision—of Monis.

I suppose that’s because violence against women is seen as “domestic” and that is seen as not a threat to people in general.

We need to stop seeing these various manifestations of misogyny—aggression, stalking, domestic violence, sexual assault—as a separate species of problem. Certainly men who engage in violence against women often do so for gendered reasons. Sometimes men are angry when women don’t obey them. Sometimes men feel that women owe them something. And women often suffer when they don’t act the way men want them to. But the consequences of misogyny and gendered violence don’t stop with women.

I’m really not sure that’s a great way to frame it. I’m not sure violence becomes worse just because it doesn’t stop with women. I’m not sure violence is more benign as long as it stops with women. Obviously Leong doesn’t mean to say otherwise, but I’m not crazy about the way she framed this.

Given the clear connection between private and public acts of violence, the relative lack of media attention to Brinsley’s attack on Thompson is inexcusable. Although local media and Twitter linked her shooting to that of Liu and Ramos within a few hours, many mainstream media outlets failed to mention her or devoted only a single sentence to her shooting until much later.

Same again – not the best way to put it.

Mind you – I didn’t mention Thompson yesterday either. Guilty as charged.

Certainly ending violence against women is a worthy aim in and of itself. But we also need to see misogyny as a warning sign both of violence against women and of violence, period. What if Seung-Hui’s stalking behavior had resulted in concrete punishment? What if Rodger’s aggression toward women had been taken more seriously? What if the various charges against Monis had been deemed sufficient to warrant his incarceration prior to trial?

Of course, taking gendered violence seriously is not a panacea. It’s not yet clear whether treating Brinsley’s shooting of his ex-girlfriend as a mere domestic dispute delayed the police in discovering his deadly intentions. Perhaps handling the event differently would have prevented the tragic deaths of Liu and Ramos. Perhaps it wouldn’t have.

What is clear is that gendered violence is often a prelude to other forms of violence. Moving forward, we should treat gendered violence as real violence, and its harms as part of a pattern that affects all of us.

Well, really, I think we should treat gendered violence as something that matters whether it affects all of us or not.

 

Comments

  1. Crimson Clupeidae says

    I wonder if the stats are the same for domestic violence by women (which I understand is a much lower rate). Is it because it’s primarily done to women, or is it primarily because the perpetrators of domestic violence usually are constrained in their targets?

    Not that the reasons are exclusive, mutually or otherwise.

  2. Claire Simpson says

    Thank you for highlighting this – I live in Maryland and saw the news reports and was frustrated at how callous some of the reporting was, like Brinsley shooting Thompson was a mere footnote. It took me some time and digging to even find out that she had (thankfully) survived.
    It’s always the unspoken implication that if a woman is hurt or killed by a partner or ex, that she in some way had a measure of culpability that makes me sick. People rarely come right out and say that (although the discussions around the Ray Rice incident did) but sometimes I feel like the domestic violence tag carries that baggage. It’s like the “domestic” qualifier in domestic violence somehow lessens the violence part, in a way that we don’t use for other terms.

  3. starskeptic says

    “…his own personal ex-girlfriend.” Ophelia, you do manage to fit a great deal of commentary in a minimum amount of space.

  4. Sastra says

    When ‘domestic violence’ involves someone shooting a mother, father, sibling, cousin, or grandparent, is it treated as an “isolated incident’ which the rest of us need not worry about unless it ‘escalates?’

    From what I’ve seen such people are generally considered extremely dangerous. I don’t think there’s the same “well, maybe they wouldn’t let him have the remote so there’s blame on both sides” attempt to mitigate the circumstances.

  5. Anthony K says

    “…his own personal ex-girlfriend.” Ophelia, you do manage to fit a great deal of commentary in a minimum amount of space.

    Ha! I thought the same thing at the same place starskeptic did.

  6. says

    I struggle with the idea that violence counts or doesn’t count depending on the status of the victim. Certain actions are always wrong, period, and full stop. That’s ethics 101. Life isn’t perfectly either/or, but some actions and situations are close enough that it is virtually the same as either/or.

    I can injuring/kill someone to prevent them injuring/killing me, or someone else, or if I have the close to 100% belief that they’re going to kill someone else so soon after our encounter that there’s no time to call the cops. I can’t injure or kill people if they hurt my feelings, or if they are absolutely horrible people, or even if they express the desire to hurt/kill people far enough into the future that I can call the police and let them deal with it. At no point does my like or dislike of the person come into play in making that decision, and so when the police are dealing with these situations they shouldn’t take ANY detail of the victim into account when deciding whether a crime has been committed. “Domestic violence” is a nonsensical description. If I punch someone in the face who isn’t posing a direct threat to me, should it matter if it is my wife, my boss, or a random person in the street? NO! The punch is the crime, and it should be treated as a crime until you can prove you can justify it.

  7. quixote says

    Like other commenters, this has set me wondering what are the statistics about calm acceptance when the victims are children or parents or other relatives in the house? Is there the same “it’s just ‘domestic'” when women shoot their husbands, boyfriends, ex-lovers?

    Why do I feel certain the answer is “no”?

  8. Decker says

    Both during and after the hostage standoff, considerable attention focused on Monis’ Islamic ties and purported religious extremism. Yet far less note was made of his extensive history of violence against women. At the time of the standoff, he was out on bail for charges relating to the murder of his ex-wife, whom he had also threatened and stalked, and he had been charged with more than 40 sexual assault offenses dating from 2000 and allegedly involving seven different women.

    Someone should slip her a note about Gamil Gharbi’s father.

    Yes, as in both the case of Monis and Ismaaiyl Brinsley, the term “Allahu akbar” most certainly translates to “I wanna latte”.

    However, in the case of that van incident in France, the term, though repeatedly invoked, meant something entirely different, something along the lines of :”Je n’ai plus de freins!”

    And just like that rape epidemic in Sweden, there is absolutely no Islamic component to any of this.

    None whatsoever.

    And as Molière exclaimed in “La Malade Imaginaire”: “Voila pourquoi ta fille est malade!

  9. Decker says

    So what’s your point, Decker? That Ophelia isn’t blaming Islam enough?

    Ophelia didn’t write the article, she merely posted it.

    Anyone remotely familiar with The French Bard would know that that author mistakes the symptoms of the maladie for the cause.

    And speaking of The French, their entire political class is right out of “La Malade Imaginaire”

  10. Decker says

    And I’d like to add that Ophelia, at least from what I can tell, doesn’t necessarily agree with every last aspect of every last article she posts.

  11. says

    Anyone remotely familiar with The French Bard would know that that author mistakes the symptoms of the maladie for the cause.

    What does any “French Bard” have to do with an English-language article about incidents in Australia and the US?

    And speaking of The French, their entire political class is right out of “La Malade Imaginaire”

    What the fuck does that even mean?

  12. Decker says

    What does any “French Bard” have to do with an English-language article about incidents in Australia and the US?

    And speaking of The French, their entire political class is right out of “La Malade Imaginaire”

    What the fuck does that even mean?

    It means that French ( and Western) elites do the rundown of the symptoms and then declare them the cause. Molière’s work is extremely corrosive. In english it’s called “The Imaginary Invalid” I encourage you to read it because it’s a real hoot!

    This was Montréal yesterday.
    http://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/montreal/yves-francoeur-montreal-police-union-boss-says-multi-ethnic-population-a-risk-to-officers-1.2881517
    …And here it is today!
    http://www.torontosun.com/2014/12/22/man-arrested-for-terrorist-threats-against-montreal-police

    I always carried a machete to protect my granny.

    Even in church!

  13. says

    Okay, there’s racist cops in Montreal too. Not sure why you had so much trouble getting to that point, or why you had to mention Moliere in the process; but hey, better late than never.

  14. says

    It always seemed to me that someone willing to take the life of someone close to them is probably not going to hold the lives of other, random people in very high regard. The cultural kowtow to the “heat of passion” defense is just an enabler.

  15. johnthedrunkard says

    Of course, police shootings (by and of) were once ‘local news’ as well. This reminds me of the UVA abduction/murder, where the perpetrator’s DNA had been on record in untested rape kits for years.

    Someone commented that DNA records for MANY crimes would solve rapes and murders at a huge rate. Perpetrators tend to leave trails of violent crimes behind them, animal cruelty, arson, bullying, burglary etc. are red flags for future violence.

  16. A Hermit says

    I’m ashamed to admit that until now I not only didn’t know her name I didn’t even know if Shaneka Thompson had survived the attack. And it took some serious googling to find out…

  17. bigwhale says

    So are we supposed to hate Islam more?

    It seems to me that treating symptoms by educating and providing economic opportunities is what will weaken the hold of Islam. Blaming beliefs held by progressives as well as radicals(Allahu akbar) only isolates them more and strengthens the negative effects of religion.

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